Accused of being condescending?

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I'm pissed about a particular friend who keeps calling me condescending. If I compliment him, or anyone in his presence, I'm condescending. If I try to offer help for something, I'm condescending. And here's me trying to show kindness in the only natural way to me. Do any of you get accused of being condescending? And have you been able to stamp it out? Because this guy is beginning to get on my nerves!!

Sounds familiar to me....

There could be lots of reasons for it:

The person you compliment is feeling insecure in the first place, therefore might feel condescended upon by anybody who comments on their looks or actions, which means you do not have to take it personal.

Your wording could be rather like the praise you would use to compliment a child ( f.ex. " That's an interesting idea you just contributed there." - ticks people off big time, although in my vocabulary it just states exactly what it says on the tin ... ).

The way you offer help (the mere fact to be offered help in front of others people often find embarrassing) should be rather an offer " Would you like some help with that?" than a overtaking statement along the lines of "Let me do that for you."

Also, a higher language level, grammar and vocabulary can sound condescending to some people.

Have you tried to broach the subject with your friend? If you let him know how his/her criticism affects you and your friendship he/she might be able to see your point of view?