It's never going to end

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I can't stop obsessing about why that relationship had to end, why he stopped talking to me, why... The pain is going to be there till the day I die but I can't do anything to make that day come sooner so I am stuck in hell. All I can do is try to distract myself and I'm sick of it. I wish he'd have just left me the f*ck alone in the first place, never emailed me, never paid attention to me, just left me ALONE if this was going to be the outcome. I don't know why this kind of "cut off contact" thing causes this kind of hurt to me, but the not knowing is driving me insane.



~Kate

i am sorry that you are hurting. but please entertain some "cold comfort" thoughts from an old fart that nobody wants anything to do with-
bad experience teaches indelible lessons, while one tends to become innured to good stretches that are not punctuated by bad experiences.
i don't know why the other person cannot find it in their presense of mind or heart to explain why they left you in the lurch, but keep in mind that it is they who fell down here and not you. you now know very well from this experience, that other parties are deserving of at least your [gently] honest thoughts when you are the party that separates from them for any reason. at least you had a good experience earlier on with this other person, many folk never get even that far in life, moi included. also remember, that nobody has the right to make you feel bad about yourself, without your permission. you are sole keeper to the keys of this permission, so you should never give this permission out to anybody, at anytime.
time heals, and you will also.

Thanks...I appreciate your thoughts. Sometimes I give out that permission too readily. I don't make connections very frequently and when I do, and they get broken off like this, it hurts deeply and it seems to take forever for me to get over it. I don't know if I can or if I will this time.

~Kate

I'm sorry. The only thing that ever helped me through heartbreak was finding a distraction or a new thing to be interested in. After a while I stopped letting heartbreaks ruin me cause I realized that someone who's a better match usually comes along.