"If you take a couple days to cool off..."

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I remember those words. I read them as the fluster of internet drama swelled up around me from the laptop perched on a pillow on my lap. "If you take a couple days to cool off, you'll see that you're being a d!ck and apologize and come back."

I wasn't being a d!ck. In fact, the person who was talking to me wasn't even the one I'd had the disagreement with. It was a minor disagreement but the person's husband swooped in and really degraded me, called me a liar, the full ten yards. I was offended. So I was taking a step back from a mutual space on the internet, just a facebook group. This offended Ms. Busybody, who initiated her discussion with me by threatening to "be done with" me if I'm the kind of person who just leaves.

I'd already announced that I was leaving Facebook for G+ so abandoning that group was inevitable. This group has existed in several forms over the years from a newsgroup to a listserv to a livejournal community and now a facebook group. Many of the people were already in my circle (named this group name, of course) in G+, including Ms. Busybody. Am I really leaving?

I tried to talk to her. God help me, I honestly tried talking to this person. She was really very off the hook. I guess she was far more invested in whatever it all was than I was. I was just doing what I knew I could do to keep myself from getting hurt. I hadn't been hurt. I was insulted and offended, but not hurt yet. So she gushed personal details (mine as well as hers) onto my G+ in a post where I discuss having aspergers. This is a personal enough post, I didn't need her gobble-dee-guck on top of it. Apparently it was alright for her to call me a d!ck but it was not alright for me to say I was not a d!ck because then she started calling me nasty and demanding an apology.

I'd had enough. I deleted our comments and closed comments to the post. Then I began downloading my Facebook so I could delete the account. In that time, she got so mad at me... from talking smack on the facebook group I left (people tell me things whether I want to know or not) to removing me from G+ (who is doing the leaving now?). It all seemed so silly.

So I waited a couple days and then re-evaluated what had happened. I concluded that Ms. Busybody is an absolute psychopath with deeper attachment problems than I have and I'm so beyond and over the whole Facebook environment where to be friends with someone you have to tolerate their league of possibly jackwagon friends (or husband). I was happily done with Facebook and very pleased with how G+ is shaping up.

What's more, I realized something important, I don't give a rat's-ass about strangers who disagree with me and get rude. Their behavior is their problem. I'm not going to fight with them, try to convince them of my point of view, or bother to correct their misinformation if they have not already opened a polite and civil discussion that is friendly to that interaction. If they get out of hand with insulting, I'm done. No need to say anything back. I'm just done because at that moment, they no longer matter and what they say no longer matters. I'm done.

And everything's been better since that moment. I wish I could say so on G+ without making the remaining people of that group feel like I'm putting them in the middle of what Ms. Busybody turned into a big deal. I want to share with people that I've grown. This is a milestone. I don't give a crap! Woohoo! Because it feels good.

While I'm not blue or depressed, I chose the Haven because this post is very personal and requires some TLC in response. I'm not cold-hearted now. I'll put my life at risk to save another... I just won't keep them in my G+ circle if they cause fuss. My discourse and communication has been elevated and my expectations for others have been elevated. I feel more positive about my social time on the internet knowing there won't be a catastrophe of drama waiting for me.

I'm repeating myself so I'll stop this post now, but, man I really recommend this. Just stop arguing with jackwagons on the internet. You'll really feel better!

This is all incredibly true, I should take notes.

Also funny that the husband had anything at all to say about the wifes business, it was an internet argument.