One week into graduate life...

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And I already want to go back to school. I don't want to be an adult anymore. My phone died, I lost my social security card, my mom hates me, and I just can't take it. I'll never amount to anything. I'm trying to ask her for help and she keeps yelling at me to stop crying. I'm sorry that the prospect of my identity being stolen isn't important to you. She just tells me to calm down and I'm sorry but that doesn't work. I would think she knows about my meltdowns by now, considering I've lived with her since birth. She's such a selfish b***h that I wonder why I ever loved her in the first place. I don't know why my crying pisses her off so much. How much is it to ask to get a hug from my mom? Apparently it's a lot. I wish I could get a job and move out as soon as possible. I don't care that I can't drive. I would rather walk to work than rely on that b***h. Now I'm bawling my eyes out and she's pissed off at me for crying about something that's really serious. I know she's never lost her social security card so that puts her on a higher playing field as someone who's better than me. She's always been better than me. At my age she was engaged, skinny, beautiful, and had a degree and job for 2 years. If I was more like her, she would love me.

What if a company wants my social security card when they try to hire me and I can't give it to them? They won't be able to hire me then and they'll think I'm irresponsible when I'm not. I just moved back from college so who knows where my card could have ended up. I just hope some identity thief doesn't have it.

It'll be all right. *hugs* Have you tried going to the Social Security office and getting a new card? I lost mine a couple of years ago and I went to the office and had them send a replacement in the mail. It happens more often than you think. As for your mom, I hope everything works out, I'm going through a lot of the same stuff with my dad right now. It stinks but hang in there!

Don't worry Erisad! You are not damaged! I too compare myself to my parents when they were my age and my sister. All were/are "successful adults" about five years earlier than me. In fact sometimes they compare their success at my age to my non-success to try to prod me out of non-functionality, I guess, not realizing that that is not an effective strategy.

Anyway: for some reason, things like losing my Social Security card, which I have, has never bothered me much for some reason, maybe cause I have no assets. I guess different things affect people differently.

I've for a long while thought what a great person you are and thought I wished I had a chance to know you in real life! I know that has nothing to do with your mom/your becoming-adult issues, but anyway, you're a person I admire and I definitely wouldn't call you damaged!

Oops, double post. Well to make it worthwhile:

((((Erisad))))

(that's a hug, btw)

I'm sorry you lost your Social Security card. It is kinda scary. Go down to the Social Security office and get a new one. It sounds like your mom hates you, which is not unusual for aspies, it seems that many of us have parents who hate us. How can a parent be so cruel to its own flesh and blood? My dad abused me, but he was schizophrenic, so it wasn't his fault. Some people on WP sound as if they have sadistic parents. Maybe you should move to a city and find work. I know you're scared of cities, but when the alternative is living with that wicked mom of yours...

so pretty, thanks purchase.

Seems like your mom is very harsh. I am sorry. My mother was like that also.

Do you have someone else - like a good neighbor friend or older mentor you could go to? They might be able to help you with the job search like with networking and stuff?

Also, does your mother know you are on the spectrum? If she did, maybe she would understand your difficulties and the challenge of transitioning from school - a structured environment - to the world of work - where you have to present yourself socially and all that.

I hope you find your Social Security card soon! Do you have a pass-port? I got all my documents back using that after my wallet got stolen once.