Fathers Day Dinner Meltdown

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My in-laws always insist on doing dinners at restaurants for special events. I hate restaurants to begin with but by the time I was done yesterday I had completely lost it. Between the loud music in the background, kids running all over the place and adults taking forever to order there food. My wife felt so bad that my Fathers Day was ruined and has stated we won't do the dinners anymore but as someone who just found out he has aspergers I dont really want to tell my in-laws that I have aspergers. I figure after I yelled at the table yesterday they have some idea that something is wrong. I guess I just have to find away to deal with those situations better.

You don't have to tell your in-laws, or anyone else about your Asperger diagnosis. Just tell them that you find eating out to be very stressful, so you won't be spending your holidays that way any more, because holidays are meant to be enjoyed.

I suggest that from now on, you and your spouse prepare holiday meals at home the day or the weekend before, and then have the in-laws over in a more peaceful, and relaxed environment. With the food already prepared, you can just reheat and eat it, or serve cold meals, like sandwiches. You can even use paper plates and disposable cups on some occasions to make clean ups quicker and easier! Have the kids help with the food prep and clean ups, too.

We Aspies need to keep stress at a minimum. Take control of your holidays, so you can enjoy them. And, enjoy your life.

agreed Barbecue's and picnic's are the easy rout. when they get to be a little to much i just step away and act like im on my cell phone and pace As many times as I have told my family that when we do eat out that it has to be a calm resturant no sports bars and i love arguing every time no freacking booths, lol never fails!

I think I will probably go the route of bbqs and potlucks. I hate booths at restaurants. It feels like you are trapped unless you can luck into the side seats. I did leave in the middle of the meal to take a break so that helped but in the end I still list it so I think we have to do potlucks.

Are there any quieter restaurants where it is more chilled out with fewer people and less noise?
Or make an excuse that you already have plans without the in-laws and/or just see them for a bit after your meal with your wife.