One staff person at my clubhouse will be the death of me!

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01 Aug 2011, 10:58 pm

Not really, but she's getting on my nerves.

I'm losing weight but I want to get to a goal that's right for me. I feel that somewhere between 165 and 200 lbs would be attainable for me. She said on the phone, "You could probably go even lower than 165." I got all snarky with her and said, "Yes...I know...I've heard it before. All women are supposed to be a certain size. Women can't be over a size 12. Women have to be small. Women can't have any muscles. I want to get down to 200 lbs to begin with and see how I do." My feeling is that those healthy weight range charts were made up in the 1940s when people were naturally a lot smaller. I'm not meant to be small and feminine built like my kid sister. I'm meant to weigh between 160 and 180 lbs with a very Mick Avory-like appearance. That woman is beginning to drive me insane. At least I go swimming 4 times a week. She probably sits on the couch and watches American Idol.

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jmjelde
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02 Aug 2011, 12:47 am

What's the clubhouse?

jmjelde
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02 Aug 2011, 12:53 am

What's the clubhouse?

Spazzergasm
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02 Aug 2011, 8:52 am

I think she was trying to be nice...

CockneyRebel
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02 Aug 2011, 1:03 pm

My goal is my own personal business. If you're interested in helping me than I welcome the help. If you're one of those sizeist people who think that larger people can't be happy or healthy, than I'm sure that the other members who have made their own threads in The Haven need you more than I do.

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CockneyRebel
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02 Aug 2011, 1:09 pm

May a moderator please lock this thread? I should have known that you people would act this way towards me.

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tomboy4good
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02 Aug 2011, 1:09 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:

I think you hit on something here. Being female, we are expected to look & be a certain size or shape. However, I think it's even more important to be happier in your own skin. :-)

Is there someone else there who might be more helpful instead of pushing something on you that makes you uncomfortable?

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CockneyRebel
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02 Aug 2011, 1:12 pm

tomboy4good wrote:

CockneyRebel wrote:

I think you hit on something here. Being female, we are expected to look & be a certain size or shape. However, I think it's even more important to be happier in your own skin. :-)

Is there someone else there who might be more helpful instead of pushing something on you that makes you uncomfortable?

There are a couple of people who would be able to help me. I'll talk to them about it. I can also ask the boss there if I could have a new contact person.

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tomboy4good
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02 Aug 2011, 1:46 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:

tomboy4good wrote:

CockneyRebel wrote:

I think you hit on something here. Being female, we are expected to look & be a certain size or shape. However, I think it's even more important to be happier in your own skin. :-)

Is there someone else there who might be more helpful instead of pushing something on you that makes you uncomfortable?

There are a couple of people who would be able to help me. I'll talk to them about it. I can also ask the boss there if I could have a new contact person.

Cool! Glad to hear she is not the only one you can work with. :-)

CockneyRebel
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02 Aug 2011, 3:59 pm

jmjelde wrote:

What's the clubhouse?

Stepping Stones, which is a place for people with mental health issues.

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CockneyRebel
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02 Aug 2011, 4:00 pm

tomboy4good wrote:

CockneyRebel wrote:

tomboy4good wrote:

CockneyRebel wrote:

I think you hit on something here. Being female, we are expected to look & be a certain size or shape. However, I think it's even more important to be happier in your own skin. :-)

Is there someone else there who might be more helpful instead of pushing something on you that makes you uncomfortable?

There are a couple of people who would be able to help me. I'll talk to them about it. I can also ask the boss there if I could have a new contact person.

Cool! Glad to hear she is not the only one you can work with. :-)

I'm also happy about that.

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hyperlexian
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02 Aug 2011, 4:30 pm

Spazzergasm wrote:

I think she was trying to be nice...

well, when CockneyRebel told the staff person of her goal, she wan't looking for someone to tell her to create a new goal. she wanted to share her aims and perhaps have some encouragement for that.

it's kind of like aiming for a B in a difficult subject in school, and having a school counsellor (who doesn't understand all of the factors and challenges behind your goal) tell you to go for an A. it can be really discouraging.

the staff member hurt her feelings and it made her frustrated. whether or not that person intended to be mean or nice is not really the point.

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Spazzergasm
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02 Aug 2011, 6:42 pm

hyperlexian wrote:

Spazzergasm wrote:

I think she was trying to be nice...

Ohhhh, I understand now.
I'm sorry Cockney! I didn't mean it like that.
I think 165 is definitely a fine goal.

CockneyRebel
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02 Aug 2011, 10:57 pm

Spazzergasm wrote: