Not deserving to be happy

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I do not feel I deserve to be happy. In order to make this simple, I will not go into the reasons why.

I wanted to find out if anyone else ever thought this about themselves for whatever reason.

I'm not sure if "deserving" to be happy is the right term. We are all entitled to pursue happiness. Anybody who tells me otherwise is as toxic as a scorpion, and will be similarly avoided. Avoid toxic people at all costs.

I've felt that way before it was something that I sorta out grew a bit. When I was younger I was blamed a lot for making other people's lives miserable. Not on purpose though. Basically I'd make a lot of social or other errors because of my bad LDs and it would inconvenience other people. I felt bad that I was dependent on people or inconveniencing them. My cure for that was telling people upfront that I have a disability that may interfere with my abilities to do things properly. That was one reason anyway. The other was my parents, I was super dependent as a kid and they actually admitted that all the time they had to spend helping me with things like school and stuff had interfered with their happiness. I'm not close with my parents anymore because they made me feel like a huge burden. Rather than feeling like a burden I just feel I have no place in this world. Which is slightly better because at least I don't feel like a worthless person. I just feel like a rejected person instead and it hurts a little less.

Absolutely! It's like if you're happy because you're numb, on antidepressants, or not being yourself...

Ignorance is bliss!

that is a thought that keeps coming into my head from time to time.

Happiness is subjective, I do agree that we have the right to pursue happiness but people have different perspectives on what happiness is. I think society wants us to believe that true happiness is a competition for the survival of the fittest or in terms of who has the best health, wealth and love but I think true happiness is priceless and comes from living in the moment or living for experiences.