Meltdown because of mentally challenged people.

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Today I went out with my social worker to do some shopping at a plaza where a home for people with severe mental illness or are mentally handicapped is close by. I hate that home more than life itself after being forced to stay there shortly after my diagnosis with Asperger's because I had no other place to go, and I wish with all my heart that the place would burn to the ground after the hell I went through in there. Anyway, after some shopping my worker and I go to have a coffee at a nearby doughnut shop. While we're in there a bunch of people from the home come in and start making an awful racket. My pleasant one-on-one conversation is continually interrupted by various grunts and yelps and very loud talking. That's when I just lost it. I jumped up and grabbed my cup of tea, spilling it everywhere and stormed out. Then I flung the cup onto the sidewalk and continued walking as fast as I could to the Wal-mart. My worker did not follow me. She seemed to have once again disappeared, as I was searching for her all over the parking lot and checking the stores. I know she's more concerned that I may damage her car if she drives me home in my state than causing damage to myself. I ended up taking the bus home because I couldn't find her and I had no other ride, it's very far from my apartment and even then the bus only stops as far as downtown and I have to walk nearly half-an-hour the rest of the way home. She didn't even call me to make sure I got home okay, it's as if she doesn't care at all. I know it's very wrong and immoral to react that way around mentally disabled people but I'm sorry to say I really don't care!! ! I can't stand it when people all around me talk loudly, cough a lot, laugh a lot, squealing kids, snarling teenagers, or people making rude sudden noises. It activates my fight or flight response in the same way when if a normal person were stung by wasps. And I don't care about what I "should" have done instead. I'M NOT SORRY I DID IT. Right now I wish I lived a million miles away from every other human being and had everything I need like food and clothes dropped to me from a helicopter.

That sounds like a pretty heavy case of sensory and emotional overload.

The shopping plaza - at least if it was fairly busy - would have raised your (fight/flight/stress) arousal level to some degree. You may not even have noticed it unless you checked out how tense your muscles were. I am only beginning to realise how tense I get (without always noticing it) when I pass through shopping arcades and other "busy" public places. I feel "pressed in" and "hunted" - I just want to get through the area as fast as possible. Just seeing all those bodies moving about annoys me subtly - at a subliminal level it is too visually busy and "flickering".

Anyway, so you go into a cafe and there are all these intense, unpredictable social, auditory, and visual sensations. Given that you might already be a little stressed, that cafe full of unusually "active" people could easily push an Aspie over the top with sensory and emotional overload. Too much for the Aspie brain to process. That needn't be prejudice, just sheer sensory overload.

I can certainly imagine feeling like that.

A nice quiet park could be a better place to hang out with your coffees and doughnuts, if there is one near by. Shopping plazas are a known issue for people on the spectrum, I would have thought.

I totally agree with the first poster. I had to deal with the noise and aggervation from the mentally challenged people (and other types) for a long time. I'm glad I'm not in public school anymore.

With all due respect, based on your behavior, you might belong in this group home.

Your social worker probably just sees you as another "ret*d" based on your actions.

In addition to having to be responsible for all of the "various grunts and yelps and very loud talking" of the other clients, the social worker also has to deal with yet another disruptive person who throws hot tea all over a public place, then litters and runs away.

It's obvious the others didn't just happen to show up, but rather they were brought there as well, and your social worker, who is also their social worker, was responsible for you all as a whole. You wanted her undivided attention, and when you didn't get it, you threw a tantrum with no concern for the others around you, including patrons of the doughnut shop.

My opinion disagrees with this profoundly.
There are so many errors with this 'analysis' I'm daunted even thinking about listing them.
Especially since -in my experience- organic computers that output these kinds of concepts wont listen, wont adjust at this time.

I hear you lostonearth35, been there, so have many others.
You're not weird, or wrong.
This is what everyone does (yes I mean everyone... again_with_this just did it) once passed their threshold.

Meltdowns don't last forever. You already know that lots of people have lots of problems and your social-worker may have had her own version of a meltdown when she lost you. The reality of the world is that we can't expect anyone else to really do much better than we can do. Be strong. With all the stuff you've already been through we know you're durable. Remind yourself when you can 'you are proven durable'.

Meltdowns are normal. If someone isn't super happy about how their own meltdown went, I'd encourage them not to feel guilt or shame (because it's counterproductive and wastes time*) and see if there are ways to make their next meltdown more happy.

*(ppl w/ASD could have so many things to feel guilt and shame about -if they choose to listen to angry ppl- that we're talking about losing literally years cumulative off of our lives.
We don't have enough time...)

I'm not sure what I did, exactly, but I stand by what I say. Feel free to list the errors of my analysis, as I'm always open to new ideas. Dismissing me as an "organic computer" who won't listen isn't constructive, and very presumptuous of you.

Part of the problem is that you're not "looking at the big picture." Why would these other folks from the home just happen to show up? Perhaps you're not familiar with group homes and social workers. My mother's friend works in a group home, is responsible for a party of people at an outing, and talks about how each individual one of them often specifically demands her time, even when she's responsible for the group as a whole. She said the outpatients who come to these things are often no better. That these individuals in the group don't seem to know/care that they're actually in a group, and want her undivided attention. And often, they'll get emotional and throw a fit if they feel they're not getting 100% attention.

While we can understand sensory overload, it's important to remember the specifics of this situation and look at it from an outside perspective. So please, feel free to "list all the errors with this 'analysis.'"

Hey. I made an album about people with AUtism. It can help you. Please go listen. It will answer your questions.
http://nibirunon.bandcamp.com/album/nibirunon

I understand what you mean OP. A few weeks ago I had to get my younger daughter out of school early for a Dr appt. After the Dr we went by McDonalds. Now, we have a "mental health center" here in town that has a day program for mentally handicapped people. They take them places a couple of times a week. On a walk, out to eat, to a park, etc. On this day it was the McDonalds.

They got there right as we did and my daughter told me what she wanted and went to the bathroom. I was trying to decide what I wanted and there was one of the people from the center in line next to me, so I told him to go ahead. Bad idea.

He spent about 8 minutes asking every conceivable question about every product they had. Whats on it, does that have to be on it? Can he get it with this instead? Why is it called that because the last time he got that it was called something else. No, he wants a burger with this, that and the other thing on it. No, not that, it was something else, what else do you have? This went on until I was honestly about to say "JUST ORDER A FREAKING BURGER!! !!" when he finally figured out that what he wanted all along was a Quarter freaking Pounder. The first thing he asked about.

God!

While we were eating, there were two of them (Mr Arthur who walks everywhere and who I know) and the ordering guy, going around talking to everybody about Jesus. I just said "Mr Arthur, my daughter is sick and she's contagious. That means ya'll could catch it, you best go over there". I like Mr Arthur. He had a traumatic brain injury and thats why he's like that. His ex wife hit him in the head.

I guess what you have to remember is they can't help being that way, and they wouldn't want to be that way if given a choice. I'm sure that everybody in this world has gotten on somebody else's nerves at one time or other. I guess we need to learn to put up with other peoples crap like that from time to time.

Uh, they're ret*d. They lack the mental ability to even know what they're doing.

I don't think that's comparable to NTs who are indifferent or smug, and actually know, or should know, that they're being rude.

I'm not listing them.
lostonearth35 vented.
It's not about you.

don't fret, you're fine, I'm positive you can cope with some anon poster having a differing opinion.

Those people have as much of a right to be out in public as you do. They also have a right to be alive as well.

They may get on my nerves, but the last poster is right, they do have the right to exist just like we do as we also have our own challenges to deal with.

I'm always open to hearing different opinions. That's why I'd actually like to hear them from you.

And it's not about you or me, it's about our reaction to the vent. And if it were me, I'd always appreciate feedback and a difference of opinion if I were to vent, even if I disagreed. Do you not feel the same? So, please, enlighten me.