I want to be dead

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I want to be dead, I can't see another option. As I have said I have depression before, I'm coming to realise that treatment or recovery is not a option. My life feels like such a waste. Nearly all of my life I've felt like a user or have felt used by family, my 'friends' and by everyone. To get treatment I may have to reveal secrets that will make my life worse than what it always is... By reveals secrets about myself and others I will be making life difficult for myself and others involved.

Aspies develop compulsive lying as a defense mechanism, unconsciously. By the time you realize it you've probably misrepresented enough truth to feel guilty about it. Please read my post here.

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt207282.html

Sometimes all we need is a new perspective.

Please consider that I am telling the truth

Secrets. We all have them. Unless they're really out there like murder, they're not that unique. Feel free to get it off your chest. It will lighten your load.

It is really out there It relates to something being inflicted on me. I will try to ring the samartians

Last edited by Duncan on 20 Aug 2012, 12:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I hope you called them... I really, really do. You don't need to suffer alone. Might sound like bullsh*t, but it's true. Doesn't mean that I won't be annoyed as hell the next time I'm struggling and someone says something like that to me. I'm sure I'll roll my eyes. But I'll only be doing myself a disservice.

Regards Duncan.

Regards to all.

Thanks for the support. I have rang the Samartians they gave me a possible way around the barrier that was preventing me from getting treatment.

Well as long as you are going to do this as that call was the first step.
Nobody deserves to die.

Last edited by PastFixations on 20 Aug 2012, 4:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Well done Duncan. That was a big step in the right direction.

Glad to hear it. I've been there myself.

Very relieved to hear it, Duncan.

Regards to all.

I've been suicidal before and actually tried it. The thing about wanting to be dead is that when you are dead you won't be able to enjoy it because you won't know it, because you'll be, well, dead.

As long as you're alive theres always a chance for things to get better. There isn't when you're dead.

Revealing those secrets may have a cathartic effect, and if your doctor told everyone, (assuming it's not something he's required to report) you could sue him.

The Good News: I want to be alive. I will getting treatment...in time.

The Bad News: I had to take a chance on making life more difficult to save my life.

To those this following:

At the moment I am partly homeless but working to get a place and a job asap.

Basically starting my life over

good luck with starting your life over itll be hard but better for you. is there no homeless shelters or anything nearby and friends or family that can help you out?
ive wanted to die recently but i am also working on improveing things that get me down its going well for me i hope it does for you too!