My insecurity in dating

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At the end of Spanish class the other day, two guys were talking about dating and girls. I jokingly said to them that I think that dating in high school is pointless and that a relationship wouldn't last long. Of course, I was partially being honest with my joke, since I have never dated a girl before and am little intimidated whenever I hear about others dating. One of the kids, politely, told me that he thinks that dating in high school is a good thing and that it helps build experience for relationships in the future. This got me thinking, what if I go on a date and not know what to do? I never dated anyone in the past, so what if I do go on one and I do something wrong or miss a social cue? I told my dad about it, he told me that I should think next time before responding to a conversation like that. That making a comment on something personal like that could hurt someone's feelings. I'm very upset over this and I do not know what to do.

It sounds to me that your interaction with the 2 guys after class yielded something positive, actually. What the guy said about dating in HS building experience for the future seems to resonate with you.

Maybe taking a pragmatic perspective on dating might ease your insecurities a bit. Dating is an appointment to share an activity with a member of the opposite sex to whom you're attracted. So what do you like to do for fun or diversion? An absorbing activity makes the social interaction smooth. You're interacting by sharing the activity.

You might miss a social cue. NT guys miss social cues, too. Girls are used to that. Yep.

If people get their feelings hurt over a simple disagreement, they should stay at home wrapped in cotton wool until they learn

A. That sometimes people will have different views than they do.

B. That openly disagreeing with them is not a personal attack.


Everyone does things wrong on dates, and every inexperienced person is nervous and not quite sure what to do. The key is to learn from your mistakes and not give up because you think you'll never be any good.