Harrassment through Emails... should I call the police?

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How do you know it's him? None of what he's done sounds illegal, so calling the cops wouldn't really be any sort of option. The emails sound like typical spam that everybody gets, and unless it has his name as the sender or he's signed them, I wouldn't assume it's him. Even if it's a first name it could be coincidence if there is no last name.

If I were you I'd just delete the emails without reading them and when you see the guy out in public, walk past him without making eye contact.

Have you contacted the police yet, or are you still dithering over what to do?

Take a look at the email address next to the same. See if it's something you might recognize, or if it even makes sense.

I've got e-mails saying those things from friends; but when you look at the email next to the name, it's not even the same. Also, try to identify if it's the same email sending all of them.

Like "From: Kimberly (Fatguy33@aol.com)"

Someone's phishing using their name.

I would block the emails from him. Unless they contain specific threats, there's not much the police can do.

Go now and get an Order of Protection. Stalkers are nuts and there are serious laws to take care of it.

http://womensissues.about.com/od/domest ... ection.htm

I agree with Midassyna on this. I would go one step further: Depending on where you live, I would seriously consider carrying a pistol of at least .38 caliber, learn how to use it, and by all means find out the laws in your state on self-defense. I don't have anybody stalking me, and carry one, though in my truck rather than on my person. Carrying a pistol doesn't mean you have to use it; it means the option is available if ever needed. It is important to remember that when seconds count, the police are minutes away.

I find the last two posts are very extreme, given the current circumstances. Yes, there are stalkers, and yes, some men cannot let go easily - or at all. They exist; my dad was an extreme example of one.

It is important to protect yourself. However, let's look at this rationally.

It does sound like there's an element of phishing going on. A link to another site - not likely something he'd do, by the sounds of it. More likely, he'd say something smart, or irritating, to get under your skin. It doesn't sound like he'd be the type to be able to hold back on the verbal abuse.

He is not necessarily responsible for the phishing. I'd just leave it for now. Plus, this could be unsettling you.

If the emails escalate, though, then you can escalate appropriately. However, if you make an issue out of something that isn't an issue, you risk antagonising a situation that could be resolving itself anyway.

Hang on a minute here. The guy has walked past him, made faces and said things, and now he's getting emails with links which may or may not be from him and we have folks telling him to call the cops, get a restraining order, and now even to walk around heavy? Holy hell, and people say I go overboard!

For real though, think about this a second. And when you think about it, keep in mind that I'm not trying to put down the OP's concern here, I'm only trying to put it into perspective from the standpoint of the law. The guy hasn't done anything illegal. Making faces and saying rude things is not illegal. It's rude, it's bad manners, it's bad home training, it's not illegal. The emails may or may not be from the guy, and if they are they may or may not be harmful. Getting the cops involved in this will make them think he's overreacting to everything and if and when the guy does something actually harmful and illegal they won't take him seriously. It's best to just ignore the guy and treat him exactly like what he is, an annoying ass, instead of building him up as a big danger that the cops need to handle. Ignore him. Stop scaring the OP by talking about stalking and guns and cops. Ignoring the guy is the best bet. A gun is the absolute last thing he needs! If he gets upset by a guy making faces at him he sure won't be able to deal with prison when he goes there for murder when he shoots the guy for being rude!

OP, the guy is a jackass and you just need to ignore him. Delete the emails. Avoid him. No contact with him. Don't speak to him, don't answer him, nothing. He will keep bothering you for a little while but he will get tired of it and find somebody new to bother. Unless you want to kick his ass for him, that's the way to handle it.

This man has already stolen from her and put his hands on her (grabbing her shirt) and threatened her. She has stated that "there's this guy who has hurt me many times before, in various ways". The emails do not sound like an isolated incident and it doesn't sound like the man is going to stop.

OP has to do these things:
1) Tell the man that you want him to stop contacting you. Using email is the best way to do this because it provides a paper trail. By law he is obligated to discontinue contacting you.
2) Document the occasions (previous and current) where he has violated your space/privacy/body/safety. This will establish a record of offenses.
3) If after you have stated he should no longer contact you and he continues to do so, file a police report and/or obtain an order of protection.
You should not live in fear.

Phishing OP from the man's email account can only occur if the man had her email in his address book to begin with, and OP said she never gave him her email address. Phishers cannot obtain email addresses from someone if they don't exist on their computers. So, it is likely that this man surreptitiously obtained her email address by other illicit means, and so her privacy is at stake at this point.

My only question to OP is: How do you know that it is he who has that email address? Is his name in, or a part of, the email address, making it obvious that it is him? In other words, did he specifically identify himself to you in the email? Did he once give you his email address in person?

I once got a phishing email from a "josh#####" email address, so I thought it was my neighbor, who had that name. However, it turned out that my neighbor had no such email address nor was his email account hacked. It was just a coincidence that he shared the same name as this phisher.

I would first establish that this is the guy who you think it is sending the emails. Then proceed to the steps I wrote in the previous post.

I agree totally; caution is the word of the day, especially when dealing with firearms. Having a firearm though hardly means one has to use it, but it is better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it.

But let me caution anybody who has read my words: NEVER threaten to shoot anybody, much less brandish a weapon, unless that person has made serious threats against person or property.

The OP is a guy too. I don't think this is a case of an ex romantic partner stalking someone. I think it's just an a**hole being an a**hole in a minor way.

I agree with carrying guns. I'm all for it. I'm for open carry. The thing is, not everybody is cut out to carry a gun. If the OP considers these emails something that the police might should be called over, then there's no telling what he might think he should shoot somebody over. Carrying a gun is not the best choice for him, in my opinion.

I agree. Not everybody is cut out to drive either. That doesn't mean I wouldn't recommend automobiles--properly used, of course.

Olive, thanks for pointing this out. It does change the dynamics a bit marginally, but it still smells at the very least like harassment if not stalking behavior. And if OP is concerned about his man's lack of boundaries and for his own physical safety, I do still think my measures would be applicable. Nobody should live in fear or undue stress. I am wondering how OP knows this other person to begin with.

I think it's shocking that someone would carry a lethal weapon, on the possibility that something might just happen. It puts the user at serious risk, especially should the time come they cannot pull the trigger. Carrying a lethal weapon surely creates fear and undue stress in abundance.

There is a saying "No one needs a gun...until you need a gun." You'd be amazed how many people have permits to carry firearms in public, and sometimes, they are used to stop evil. I myself was in a parking lot one night and a girl came running across the parking lot being chased by a guy. Turns out they were friends but had he been a rapist, I was prepared to stop the threat and protect her. There were no cops in the area. It's all about being prepared, and it's the one preparation that you pray you never need to use. The news doesn't cover it often, but there are plenty of stories of people who carry "on the possibility something might happen" and it does. Plus, with most people you'd never know they were carrying.

Here's an example. Police could never have made it in time to stop this robbery.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wWoLGC-n4i4[/youtube]