I just cannot cope

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I cannot deal with my family right now. College deadlines are quickly approaching, and I really want to apply for two colleges. One is here in my County, and the other is a specialized college in Vermont for people with disabilities like ASD. However, my grandmother and my mother (who mentally is just an extra appendage of my grandmother ) are completely against me. All that I hear is that I am not good enough, that I'm too immature, that I'd never survive on my own, that it's too far away (The one in Vermont, although they consider the one on the other side of the county also "too far away"), and that even if I get accepted (which they say I won't) that I'm not going to the one in Vermont, that they won't pay a cent, and to "give it up" because I'm going to community college, if anything.

An English teacher and close counselor told me that the only way I can do well in life is if I get far away from the influence of my grandmother

maybe your counselor can help you with finding scholarships? Apply to both of those colleges!

There's no fixing or pleasing toxic people. Get them out of your life if at all possible.

But it becomes a problem when I have to try and come up with the application fees (My family wont pitch in). And my counselors never have time. My mother and grandmother refuse to lend a hand to help.

Thats kind of a problem when I cannot live on my own

Contact each school about your family situation and the application fees and see if the school will waive them.

Have you filled out the FASFA? If you qualify for government grants (different from loans) you might get the school to waive other fees too.

my dad told me I couldn't afford to go to college and I'd "just get married anyway." I got a full tuition scholarship and went.

you might want to think about a small job, maybe a paper route so you can afford some application fees. having your own money would do good things for your independence and confidence.

i will pray for you.