Stressed due to change in routine

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My uncle is visiting this week, and while it's nice to see him, the change in my routine is basically making me fall apart.

The increased expectation to socialize stresses me out, as well as the feeling that I'm disappointing him, because I'm not naturally talkative and social.

The increased noise level is overloading my senses. (For example this morning while I was trying to make breakfast, he was showing us YouTube videos of harmonicas and yodeling, help!! !)

The change in my family's meal routine (and types of food) is yet another stress factor, that makes me lose my comforting, predictable routines that keep me feeling stable and happy.

It's triggering my old eating disorder symptoms, and I'm avoiding going to the kitchen to get food, because it would expose me to forced socialization and sensory overload by being around them.

It's making me wonder what he thinks of me, and whether he thinks I'm a pathetic unemployed loser who has no excuse, and isn't even trying – and then I'm beating myself up about it.

Anyway all of this is just making me feel really bad about myself, and I have no ability to focus or enjoy my special interests, because I'm just stressed and overwhelmed 24/7, and my brain seems to have shut down, and everything feels dull and foggy and fragmented.

Not sure why I'm even posting this here, except I think it's good to acknowledge and recognize that this is a symptom of autism, and an example of what happens when there is a change to my routine.

He's going home on Tuesday, so things will get back to normal soon, but in the meantime I just have to hold on, do my best to cope, and not completely lose it! (Also I love him and I want him to have a nice visit – it's just the change to my routine that I'm upset about!)

Sorry, I don't mean to be insensitive, I know exactly what you're going through, but that's just so ludicrous it's funny. Not to you, I know, but it sounds like something from a John Candy movie.

Okay, this is the place where I break out the Chamomile. It's not a miracle herb (you really sound like you could use some Medical Marijuana) but it can help. It's available at the corner supermarket in tea form, just remember to make it very strong - I use four teabags per cup. It's got a bit of a grassy flavor, but it's worth it. I find that it really takes the edge off the raw nerves without turning me into a space cadet. I'm told by those in the know that it's the equivalent of popping a couple of Xanax.

Good for about 4-6 hours. Good luck. Hang in there.

Haha, it's funny in retrospect, but when you're being bombarded with it first thing in the morning... Good lord!

Thanks for the chamomile suggestion, I will try that! I've had it in the past, and haven't really noticed much of a difference, but then again I didn't use 4 teabags at once... Heck, anything's worth a try!

(Updating because this is really helping me to cope!)

It's Day 5 of my uncle's visit, and I'm actually really proud of myself for holding together as well as I have. In the past, a situation like this would have sent me into a complete meltdown by now, with uncontrollable sobbing and crying, and I've managed to avoid that so far. So I see that as significant progress!

But all the little changes to my routine are definitely wearing on me. I've had blurred vision for the past day, and my mental focus is awful. I'm shutting down pretty severely, but so far I'm not melting down.

Today I ate something different for lunch than usual, and I feel really uncomfortable about it, because it's left me with a different kind of energy than I'm used to.

Also I've been adding to my own stress lately by questioning whether I ought to be trying to get a job (when I haven't managed that level of functioning, ever.) But the fact that I can barely handle a house guest for a week, or eating something different for lunch without completely falling apart and crying, indicates that a job is probably beyond my capability right now, and I shouldn't beat myself up about it.

I think I'm showing signs of improvement, just by the fact that I haven't had a meltdown over this. So I'm trying to see this experience as a victory rather than a terrible thing!

My guess is that it is the autism as I always experience problems like that to greater or lesser degree. I can't say any particular thing worked to counter the stress except trying to make some quiet time for myself at some point in the day to de-tox, re-charge, just have some peace. Whether thats possible for you I do not know, but consider the possibilities... something like staying up after they are asleep and then sleeping late over their time, sequestering yourself in the laundryroom while doing laundry - staying there thru the loads -, getting a conspirator to help and give you a break, like go food shopping and then stop for a long coffee, etc.