I am being stalked and harassed by Kiwi Farms and SA

Post Reply New Topic

And every time I try to talk about it in a safe space they drag it out further. I need to be able to have a place to post about things, that are bothering me. I do talk about myself a lot. The internet is where I feel most comfortable communicating but instead I am a victim of these bullies. In addition to autism, I am a survivor of abuse, abuse from an intimate partner but also abuse from these degenerates. I have PTSD from the various associated traumas. They have tried to bring this into real life. They have tried to spread lies about me to my friends.

It started because a bunch of perma banned members of something awful didn't like my politics, they doxxed me and used it to try to paint a narrative based on out of context quotes and conjecture that I am a child abuser. I was a special ed teacher and they also threatened to spread this libel to the real world. It increased 10 fold when I came out of the closet and started transitioning to female. Kiwifar.ms discovered me when I offered comfort to another autistic trans woman and they have piled on the abuse.

Their intent is to spread these lies, to "warn" people about me. It's hurt my reputation and it has massively hurt my sanity. They have people who have befriended me only to leak things from my friends only status updates to the reprobates. I talk about things frankly with my friends that I don't want shared with the whole world. Target audience, boundaries, and context are utterly lost on these people whose sole agenda is to drive people with disabilities as well as transgender people to suicide. They handwave their abuse in that they have trans people on their staff but these people are the scummiest people on the internet and exist to legitimize the indefensible behavior the kiwis engage in.

I want to have a brave face and say it doesn't bother me but it truly makes me sick. I absolutely internalize what they say. And even as what they do in say is supremely destructive to me, and they are right that the attention they give me is hard to resist. Its very hard to look away. Part of it is that if I look away, I am not as able to anticipate and protect myself from them but also in moments where I am most vulnerable, when I am feeling most bad about myself I do look because it affirms some of what I am anxious about.

I went for a bit more than a month without looking but then they noticed and came to me. They know what triggers me, found my reddit and started posting it everywhere. They posted my dead name all over to, just to make me feel powerless and hurt. They have done this to many others. the SA permabanned folks use an animated photoshop gif of the exploding head of a transgender woman who took her own life via a shotgun. It is heart breaking to see this used as a running gag but it goes to show the degeneracy and evil that I am dealing with.

And they want to condemn me while they sadistically thrive on pain and suffering that they inflict on others.

Oh and the best part, my abusive ex-girlfriend is among them, giving them more dirt, and stirring the pot even after I have completely cut off her ability to contact me. Boundaries anyone?

Sadly they are protected by the law's total inability to deal with cyberstalking and harassment. I see now the destructive power of hate speech. They have all the power and I have none. It's not "free" speech.

What did I just read?

I honestly can't tell if this is real or if you think everyone is out to get you, not because of anything you said. Its just the level in which this harassment has continued is unreal to me, I almost can't picture it taking place. I am sorry you have to deal with this, have you tired to call the police? Did they say they can't help you because this is almost certainly illegal, I mean at the very least its slander. Also I am assuming these people have some level of computer skill to track your online accounts, what do you know about computers and can you be just as vicious to them? Track them down, attack them. Call them child abusers and cyber teenagers with no life. Be relentless and act as evil as you can towards them, attack stereotypes you personally have no problem with and remember, if the law can't touch them, it can't touch you. I'd make these peoples life hell, what kinda of information do you have of them? Cyber crime is my specialty and these people have pissed me off if what you say is true.

They're about a hundred Forum pages about me Kama all about how much I suck. They have links to stuff I supposedly said, but all of this out of context from vastly different years of my life and all of which is meant to build a narrative that I'm a pedophile. It's BS, I'm not a pedophile. I do have controversial opinions, and I have said stuff that I don't actually believe anymore, but over the course of 14 years who hasn't? Mercy and forgiveness are not in their vocabulary. It's all archived. And sadly it's all technically protected speech.


I've come to accept the truth is that no matter what I do they're never going to go away. I need to be able to live my life how I want to live it. Nothing I do is going to stop them. Even if I killed myself they would still keep going.

I think what I need is just some way of dealing with the emotional Fallout from it. I have genuinely internalized what they've said. I second-guess everything I do. I think of myself as disgusting. I probably hate myself more than they hate me, I'm just too cowardly to actually kill myself even if I think about it constantly. But I'm not going to give up expressing myself, I'm not going to give up expressing my opinion. I have a right to free speech as much as they do. And I should have a right morally, if not legally, to be able to be social on the internet, a place I feel more comfortable without being abused.

It sounds like you need a safe haven and a place to build up a good reputation.

How about doing some volunteer work? If your ex is nasty enough to vandalize a soup kitchen, you might consider volunteering at a mental health institution--even hardened criminals normally won't touch such facilities--they know how to lock you up for good.

So much to read I have been reading it for a couple of hours. They seem to rip on anyone with an ASD or is that just a coincidence?

This is a good reason to never use your real name online or post any personal information like your address or phone number or the name of the company you work for or posting any real photos and to keep your profiles private if you can. You don't want it to be traced to your personal life. I wonder how they figured out what your other user names were?

I would advise to stay off that forum and if you use any new user name, that would be a fresh start and to not mention your past and about any of this.

I'm sorry. Those people are awful. Try to stay off the Internet for a while and focus on other things.

I just got a message blackmailing me, demanding that I kill myself or that they will out my friend to her parents.

There links here that can be used for the reporting of abuse on social websites:
http://cyberbullying.org/report/

.........
General moderator note to thread posters: remember that this is The Haven and abide by the rules as posted at the top of the forum. Further failure to do so in this thread may attract formal warnings.

as an old person I don't understand why you don't just leave?
I mean, 200 years ago every person was locked in a village
and getting kicked out meant meant death through starvation, wolves or bandits

Don't you realise you're a global citizen and an internet denizen?

you can say the same stuff about them

and create the same storm?

20 years ago, there used to be places on the Internet where you could have a lively but respectful discussion without the intrusion of some idiot. Sadly, those places are gone, despite the efforts of many. Today you have tightly moderated forums where you don't feel free to express yourself, or places like this, where moderators have to remind participants to behave themselves.

Just delete your account on facebook and other accounts they have used to stalk you and try to be as anonymous as possible while you are online. You might have to make a new account on here in case they have tracked you down here too.

TW: Ableism, Racism, Cissexism, Heterosexism, Sexism, general vileness

These are the people I have been dealing with for years. A summary of the kind of people they are.

"We hate you because you are a fa***t. (See embedded link)
These people are the chief reason I want to kill myself, along with dealing with the stress of transitioning to finding a new place to work and a new place to live.

How in the hell do they KNOW that you are these things?

Obviously, they don't.

Obviously, they're just talking s**t.

Just go far, far away from this Site.

Run, run, run, run, run!! !! !! !! !

Lightninggrrl,

You don't have to leave this site - the other ones, yes; but not WrongPlanet!

Fnord

These people get off on your reaction, so the best thing to do is not give them the satisfaction.

Without that they are powerless.

Don't go on sites like Kiwi Farms / Something Awful, if you want meaningful discussions. These are for "s**ts and giggles".

Also maybe a 30+ maybe time for a change.