Gone , medical emegency .

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I was gone from here two consecutive days when this computer lab was closed when I came there ~ But , I had a real bad medical thing happen to me last night ~ and it destroyed much of my bedding and clothing .
I had an involuntary diareeic(Sp??) reaction , I believe starting when I was asleep , which led to tons of liquid + chunks fecie coming out of my behind , and really soaking much of my bed .
It ruined nearly all of my bedding (including the yoga/homeless mat I'd bought myself , for my back ) , and I tossed the shirts I was wearing then , which were most of my wearing to bed hurts ~ It's cold at night (and I have to keep the window open at night , with the " lead/mercury " , already) ~ After I had tossed the bedding there was STILL plenty of liquid stool on the bed ~ I can't sleep in it now at all .
I really have to sleep to the floor now ~ I got only a partial replacement of my bedding .
I have really very little money , especially with an unusual expense this week ~ and , I had already decided that I could not do my laundry until after my next week's money comes ~ But , now , I don't have a full amount , even , of warm clothes planned for the bedroom alone to wear and I don't think I could buy a blanket as my money stands now , let alone a sleeping bag .
The sleeping on the floor - And , really , considering the yecchy left on the bed , I have to . I sorta doubt that , even if I cleaned it off some personally with the tiny few cloths I got , it would be non-smelly enough to sleep on . ~ is a problem , with my semi-crippled hard time getting up from the floor ~ And , if I can't sit on that bed I anticipate dressing being harder .
And , that mat (Which was thrown out, along with other bedding , remember .) really did seem to help my back a little .
If I somehow had funds that would let me get more sleeping stuff , of even cleaning-up stuff as well .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...Perhaps my talking about all this " my body hates me " stuff will repulse people ~ but it's TRUE !
My meant-for-wearing-to-bed shirts are mostly gone , and the bed still has liquid poo all over it ~ It takes up a massive amount of the room .
If I could among other things replace that mat and get a sleeping bag...I'd still be on the floor (Likely cold at night ??? ) in a hard to get up from there or dress situation - Likewise replace/expand my clothes somewhat...
Even as I write now , I have that feeling of wanting to liquid-poop in my outside clothes (which are in ~ better ` shape ,. Though , as I said , I had put off laundry , lack of money . I was also having the problem with my underwear that I've talked about . ~ And , just yesterday?? , I had a slight uncontrolled bowel movement that showed through , into the shorts I'm wearing now which got me disliked ) .
It's still here .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

Do you have a Laundromat nearby? That's open?

Do yourself a favor, and wash your sheets and dry your sheets.

It would cost you less than 10 bucks.

It's lots better than sleeping on the floor.

How much has the "poo" penetrated to the mattress?

...Aguably , I don't have 10 spare dollars now , lacking any sudden funds coming in .
I don't have the bedding (with one exception) I had last night , I threw it away and there still is fecie liquid on the bed I do have a couple of sheets/whatever (not a full bed or sleeping bag , say) , and the bed , certainly now with liquid poop still on it , is unsleepable on ~ Might even be after anything but a "professional cleaning , which I can't do .
The matress is a hard-ish , not fabric . thing and the poo appears to be 100% on the top of it not soaked inside .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...And , again , my separate t-shirts for warmth in the room at night are almost all gone .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...My warmth situation improved a bit after I wrote that , and then , this day , a cleaning lady came in and did the bed enough ~ But , I am STILL ! having the " poopy-pants " , briefly to the extent of having had 4?? maybe 3-2 pairs of underpants on in the last 24 hours (and I've barely eaten ~ perhaps some Meals on Wheels food made available contributed to this , as did maybe too my taking the excess-ater , etc. plls ~ which are helping reduce my weight , yeah , but doing this too?? ) ~ and NOT EVEN A DECENT LANTERN/FLASHLIGHT to make reading at night more do-able ! My " yoga " mat which I feel helped my back pain is gone , remember , too . If I just had some extra funds...

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

That's pretty nifty that you have a cleaning lady!

You could probably get a decent flashlight for under $10.

When I was a kid, I used to read by flashlight all the time.

You could wash the poopy pants using some sort of disinfectant soap. Poop stains are actually easy to get rid of.

...SO LITTLE MONEY now . Remember my cripked-ness - and lack of transpoatation - too .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

Tuesday is coming......

You might be able to get a flashlight for the cost of a meal at McDonald's.

...That post was done at the absolute end of my computer time at this lab , with the lights having been turned off (and my eyes having that " dazzled/overexposed " feel - in a windowless room , I wanted to get something up .
I do have as I have said these drugstore 2/$10 LED lights however you must , even if they're at their best , hold them in your hand The $40-ish lantern could stand up , on its own .
The worst of the poopy pants I am referring to are REALLY bad , I can't hand-wash them in a sink ! !! !! !! !! !!
I think it was kiind of an " emergency " cleaning lady , not a Hazel type - however maybe I'm trying to draw teeny distinctions .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

In a pinch, you can use those LED things.

The cleaning lady probably gave you new sheets.

Do you still go to that place you mentioned to eat?

...I did spend money on more underwaer and a new " yoga "/homeless mat for the bed , but I sort of stabbed my baby brother in the back doing so .
My younger brother's birthday is next week .
I always send him a present , via the Internet , through this crappy Green Dot ATM card I have - and a personally selected card .
This whole last week I kept putting off going to get his card ~ which would involve going to get one , then , making my way to a weirdly out-of-the-way only full service USPO around here I know of (The one I'd used is closed now) to mail it , and buy a stamp there - Now , my birthday and Christmas cards to my brother are pretty much all the initiating USPO letters I do , even if a Walgreen's or CVS sells stamps they sell full books ~ And , having , finally , put in enough in the Green Dot (Being charged $4.95 to deposit every time plus they charge you $7.95?? a month from your account . ) , I meant to sit in front of these computers and arrnage - likely from Amazon - a gift to be sent to him .
Basically - of course - I took the stored money and bought the underwear and mat anew (Plus , some more " frivilous " spending that was also freed up .
I suppose the underwear and mat would be necessities , but I feel guilty still .
I do have to " make it up " eventually , too...
You know , I AM NOT KIDDING about it being a strain to read w-out extra lighting in the room ~ Or my eye-dazzledness , neither . It is also true that I am often tired and/or having my lower stomach/whatever pain attack me to make it hard to read at night , I have to , much of the time , lie on the bed , stomach down , and read what's on the floor ~ Or lie on my back and use the LED to light the page somewhat (Sometimes I more conventionally sit up , too .) ~ at times that pain does get to me .
And , bluntly , the $40 no-good lantern did leave the place lit up enough to read easily , without holding it .
And now it's gone .
I have to spend my money over and over again on the same things ! !! !! !! !! !!
If I had $ for " better " purchases , perhaps more durable things , maybe it wouldn't work out that way .....................
I have mediocre/not quite enough new sheets , didn't I mention that ?
I go less to St. Anthony's , they have been making available - somewhat irregularly - Meals on Wheels plastic meals , at the place , when I can I get some (You can get two a day) - However , I think at times the (Sometimes unreliably warmed up) MoW chow may have unfavorable stomach reactions .
I get so caught up in going to sleep somewhat early , for nothing to do , then waking in the wee smalls ~ Then being sleepy when it's more " normal " time .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...I see no reply for this - Over this last weekend , well , Saturday night/Sunday a (" Trigger " warning - Heh heh ! !! !! !! !! ) new apparently-starting-while-asleep pooping incident happened - It was less bad than before , but , it did leave discernable poo on the bedsheets , both of them - Not liquid this time , now this chocolate pudding-type consistency-looking poo .
So I threw them out , keeping the non-touched polyester blaket and sleeping under it on the bare bed , while put my untouched (Phew ! !! !! !! !!) but it smelled a bit mat (Which I had bought myself - the sheets + blankie are/were issue of the place) ~ It was Sunday , I knew nothing would get done anyway , I informed the front desk however - I told some staff today but I was told I couldn't get new sheets since I'd gotten one just last week .
Just a bit before going to bed that night , I had thought to myself that " maybe the excess pooping is over ":-( or similar .
Even if I avoid such accidents I have to go to the toilet so much ~ This A.M. , IIRC , I went to the toilet ~
Remember , a down-the-hall , at nearest , toilet that is pretty basic , and is just , in those rooms , a toilet and nothing more ~ I'm in an (improved) " bum hotel " , an SRO , remember .
~ And more liquid came shooting out of my butt ~ Okay , but as I dressed and got ready to go out I kept feeling the need to go back to the toilet and let more out ~ This happened three?? motre times and by the time I was finished my underwear was at least a touch (or more) poopy . This was underwear I had just put on , after the initial going . I still have it on now .
May if I didn't have to go out so much (ranted , I tend to want to...) , but I do , certainly to get this computer time I have to go out ...

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

I'm wondering if maybe you should call a doctor. All this pooping can't be good.

But make sure you keep your place at this SRO should you have to go to the hospital.

I wish you could make it more of a good thing for you.

Tomorrow's Tuesday. Get a flashlight, so you could read at night.

...The poopie may be inspired by:
(1) My perhaps rather poor diet (Oooh , did I mention the entire can of Goya refried pinto beans I'd had , not heated , the night before ? And RC Cola...)
(2) General whatever?? I have had this happen before .
(3) The effect of the water-reduction pills on me ~ I have lost a lot of weight , and a lot of bloat but it might have this side effect...
(4) I have only two teeth (My others got removed about 2007 , by this I-regret-my-involvement-with-them SS agency's arrangement , I have never had any dentures or anything . So , I maybe don't chew things/digest them enough at times ...0 . I've never had any serious " we'll gget you dentures " offer followed through on/whatever .
I don't think a haircut , etc. is going to " upscale " the look of that very much .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

Getting a haircut would help, no matter what.

Yeah....those pinto beans! That'll do it!