SHOULD be doing some financial planning

Post Reply New Topic

Instead of posting stuff on a forum, I SHOULD be making some phone calls and organizing my papers so I can finish the rest of my retirement elections and check with elder law specialists... but I find that stuff so hard to face. I have done parts of it already, but other parts remain.

It would be lovely to be able to discuss these matters with a spouse, but the spouse I have has early-stage Alzheimer's, and I really have no other family member to turn to. As often happens, my life challenges somewhat exceed my autistic ability to cope well.

Sounds boring, posting on forums is more fun.

True dat ...

I think I will limit myself to finding the relevant papers and planning what phone calls to make on Monday, because I am already too scattered today.

I texted my daughter to see if she would hang out with me today "because I feel needy," but there's no guarantee she will come through. If I have to guess, I'd say 40% chance of yes and 60% chance of no.

Hi, we will talk to you.

Thanks.... I spent the afternoon watching "Justified" on Netflix.

My plan is to be debt free. I’ve been paying into my pension for 17 years with 24 to go!

Anyhow I’m vested already so that’s good

What is a retirement "election" ?

Are the things you need to do things you don't know how to do? Or just boring tasks you can't focus on doing? Curious whether you need someone else to assist with actually doing math and making decisions, or if it's just one of those things no one Wants to sit down and do so you put it off until there's another human present so you'll actually get it done.

I went through all of this when my father fell ill from multi-infarct dementia, since my mother was also effectively disabled at the time (emphysema) and he had been her primary caregiver. It is hugely challenging (and I was working full time and overseas).

Not sure what state/county you live in, but if it's a good one, you may qualify for free legal aid / elder law / financial advice based on his age if not yours, without a means test applied. (You may know this already, but I'd be remiss not to mention it, since others here may not.)

Do you want your 401K paid out in one lump sum? (probably not, since your income tax on it would be high)

Or do you want monthly payments? If so, do you want them to continue as long as your spouse lives after your death, or do you want them to end with your death? Do you want income tax withheld? If so, how much?

What you choose will affect how much you will get at any one time. Unfortunately, the benefits office did not provide any explanation and estimates of these things, so I have to call them and ask for it. The lady I have to deal with has been slow and sloppy and blames it on "personal issues." I need to have the paperwork in front of me when I phone or I won't make any sense.

There is so much unfiled paperwork floating around that I have to sort through the papers first. Chaos.

No suggestions desired - just venting.

I'm in the US. I can get a good start on that from our local senior center, but I'm afraid I will probably end up hiring an elder law attorney because it's likely to be a complicated answer. We will need my husband to qualify for Medicaid if he ends up needing a nursing home, so how do I shelter my house and other assets to leave me anything for my own survivorship?

It's the sheer quantity of decisions that have to be made that boggle the mind, leading to my procrastination. I had less trouble than this when I retired from my own job; the retirement elections I must make now are from my first husband's earnings, which were split when we divorced 15 years ago. That benefits office is out of state so it all has to be done my mail or phone.