Meds *screams*

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Eaagh I told her and she didn't do anything, except tell me that if anything goes wrong I am to call her straightaway.

humm..
when something goes wrong, it is a bit late in the day for her help, isn't it?

With all due respect to your mum, this is not a very useful attitude. Side-effects outweighing benefits is one thing; but using medication to try to make yourself "better" has nothing to do with being weak; might as well say using antiseptic on a cut to keep it from getting infected makes you weak; true, the brain is a special case, but I'd advise you to consider carefully the implications that you are "weak" if you happen to take medication that helps keep dangerous demons under control; don't buy into it, is my humble opinion.

<sigh> I've been down the brain candy withdrawal side effects road more than a few times, though I've never been on any anti-psychotics. But, I think anything that messes with brain chemistry can be pretty nasty. I've tried traditional advice like taper off slowly; still didn't avoid sh***y withdrawals. [Anyone ever experience the "zaps"?] I’m in Paxil land right now, which I hear is very hard to get out of without incident. I don't know about anti-psychotics, but in my experience anti-depressants are like shooting in the dark, and they never work for terribly long. You should probably explore alternative treatments with your doctor, and discuss and weight the benefits/side effects carefully; if you don't trust your doctor enough to tell her, you need to find another doctor (seriously).

Godspeed to you on your journey.

Good fortune,

- Icarus

I rely on my synthyriod tablets, because I have hypo thyroidism and wouldn't function very well with out it, as it replaces a gland secretion that keeps me balanced.
I have a friend that uses insulin, and with out it her sugar diabetes would be out of control and she would go into insulin shock and die.

we don't leave these things we need behind . . . our medication is not like a cane for a broken leg, for when the leg mends we recycle the cane. No. . it makes us 'whole' and as long as we have these bodies the universe gave us, we take our medication and are grateful we wern't born into a time where we would suffer with out it.

Merle

I take 5mg of cipralex for anxiety.

I take 15mg of adderall xr in the morning and 10mg of adderall xr in the afternoon.

I love adderall xr (amphetamines). I never want to go off it. I am no longer depressed or chronically bored.

Zoloft is REALLY bad for the "zaps"! !! It's an awful, awful feeling. And it doesn't matter how slowly you go off it.

And I'd say SteelMaiden, that not taking meds that could help you have a better life, if you're not taking them because of a perceived social stigma or the like, is weak. If it's a matter of thinking you should be controlling your psychotic episodes yourself without the aid of meds, all I can say is, it ain't gonna happen. It's not your fault they happen. Take whatever help is available to you! Be happy and healthy!

Yeah, Zoloft is what did that for me. And I too did taper off, as carefully as I could. An my doc (who is quite good and bright) told me that tapering off of Zoloft isn't necessary. I guess that means you're getting zapped whatever you do.

And, I am reading the horror-story warning sheet that came with my Paxil. It includes, in part:

"BEFORE USING THIS MEDICINE: WARNING: ANTIDEPRESSANT MEDICINES MAY INCREASE THE RISK OF SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND BEHAVIORS IN CHILDREN AND ADOLESCENTS, AND POSSIBLY ADULTS, WHO HAVE SEVERE DEPRESSION OF CERTAIN OTHER MENTAL OR MOOD DISORDERS."

WTF?!? I mean, really, WTF?!?! It is fortunate that I actually died about a year and a half ago, so this doesn't really worry me too much. But if I were still alive, this would really freak me out...

Good fortune,

- Icarus

Hello Icarus, I have read so many of those nasty warning labels on meds now that I don't even heed them anymore. Seems they all could kill you! I think they're are a necessary evil, though.

I mostly went off the Zoloft because of those zaps, but now I'm taking Effexor and it does the same thing. Come to think of it, I think I've had the worst suicidal thoughts on Effexor, too. Hmmmmmm. What to do?

your experiencing withdrawal syndrome. been down that road before. ct lasts longer than a slower tapered withdrawal. best advice go back up till the wd is not so bad and make 10% cut in the dosage every 10 days. as for the psychosis theirs natural alternatives and therapy avaible. try seeing a naturopath.

i came off celexa after i had a horrible bout of suicidle thoughts and a severe compulsion to carry out some very bad things to myself . I went into a manic state 3 days later which lasted for a month then i dropped straight back into a psychotic depression . It was awefull i was actually scared of myself and what id do. I had to go to see a shrink in the end because i just couldnt handle it . The dr told me that it was highly unlikely the celexa had caused the initial suicidle thoughts and psychosis and that coming off them had not caused the manic state or follwoing depressions or psychosis . Its true to say i had been on celexa several times and had never had a problem either on them or off of them. the drs explanation is that some people have developing Bi-polar and that celexa is known to cause a worseing in that and speed up the severity of it. i am now on mood stabilizers and anti psychtics and beta blockers. i havent had a psychotic episode since ( thank god). My advice would be to see your Dr i know you said you cant, but you must try if you had psychotic episodes there is every chance they may come back and you really dont want that .

Desperation.
I can't go back on them. I know I should but I can't. My Mum would go insane. She would constantly torture me about it if I re-started. These tablets come with tiredness so bad that sometimes my sight would go blurry and I would just collapse on the floor and fall asleep... Like narcolepsy.
I can't go back on them.
But I hallucinate at night. I go into this weird world where I lose sense of all time. Time means nothing to me at night even when I have my mobile phone, my alarm clock radio and my watch around me. Last night I was playing a "guess the noise" game with my brain... WTF??? I remember saying out loud, "no, I don't want to play this game any more. I want to go to sleep." I couldn't go to sleep. I had to gatecrash my Mum's bed. And when I eventually fell asleep, she moved out of her bed and the minute I was left alone, I was absolutely convinced that my Mum's bedside lamp was somehow trying to kill me; WTF???? I went back to my bed and then MY bedside lamp joined forces with my Mum's bedside lamp... WTF??? And today I was convinced that my body was vile (my body is supposed to be great, I'm a long-distance runner, so surely my body is supposed to be well-toned etc...?) and that I had to get out of it. I cried a bit to my Mum, but she told me that she was busy and that she wanted to finish what she was doing, and that I have to stop attention-seeking and being an annoying baby. I went upstairs and tried to drown the thoughts and feeling with music, but it didn't work and I started whacking myself.
Still, when I told my Mum about last night, she said that it was probably due to me not taking the tablets, and that I have to be strong blah blah f***ing blah and that I have to not take the tablets, that I have to carry on, keep going, beat those tablets... I don't need them... F*** yeah see me wide awake again all night, convinced that my f***ing bedside lamp is trying to kill me (I stuffed it under my bed very early this morning). I'm so f***ing scared of this night when things can happen and nobody can hear me scream.