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I've gotten to the point I'm about ready to beat someone to death.

I've been trying to start a small group of card game players to meet at the local cafe on a weekly basis, but regardless of the flyers I set out, regardless of the contact information I leave behind, and regardless of the friends I talk to that have some interest in the game(s) to be played, EVERYONE IGNORES ME.

It's not just this one attempt to get some people together, but EVERY SINGLE TIME I try to plan something out that involves more than just myself participating, NO ONE COOPERATES!

Everytime I've had a birthday party, no one shows. Every time I tried to plan a road trip, no one shows. Every single time I want to meet someone on a date, I have to practically pull teeth to convince this person to go out with me to a simple movie.

Even oneline e-mail based RPGs I design with infinite player flexibility and the easiest of rules, NO ONE SHOWS!

My parents keep patronizing me, telling me it's all in my head, or no one is out to make my life miserable, but when I'm being treated like a second class citizen, both being ignored for anything positive, and then being harassed for every little thing someone thinks is wrong with me, I tend to disagree, It isn't paranoia if they're really out to get you.

It even happens here, in WrongPlanet. Apparently, I'm just not cool, ret*d, or helpless enough to be a trendy Aspie.

Is it so much to ask that I get a LITTLE RESPECT from my peers? It's not like I'm a gimp, it's not like I'm going to change my entire wardrobe or smoke dope to win people over. Any "handicaps" I have as an Aspie, I can easily compensate for IF PEOPLE WILL SHUT THEIR MOUTHS, AND LET ME SPEAK IN SOCIAL INTERACTION.

That's another thing! Whenever I'm trying to assist a customer, answer a friend's question, or have a polite conversation with ANY family member, I will start talking, and IMMEDIATELY they will begin to interrupt me! It got to the point I shouted at the top of my lungs at some ret*ds who continued to cut off anything I said. Then they whined that it wasn't necessary to shout at them.

Well, had they shown me the dignity I deserved, and not acted like a bunch of worthless insects, I wouldn't have to shout, would I?

I want answers.

My parents used to say the same, even when they knew I had AS. Its the fact that people already have their opinion of us, and they dont like it. For whatever reason, mostly that they find us to be annoying or something of that nature. Ive had it happen in WP a few times as well, so your not alone there either.
What to do? I have no idea, most of the time I dont even know what I did wrong, or at least until its too late :/

"It even happens here, in WrongPlanet. Apparently, I'm just not cool, ret*d, or helpless enough to be a trendy Aspie. "

Is there such a thing as a trendy aspie?

To be bluntly honest I think it's more to do with the way you irritate the crap out of people. Even on here.

Goatman, I think its seriously your fault that people disrespect you. I have read plenty of your posts, you always have to be right, you demand respect but dont give anybody else any, you think people should do what you say ect... I thought I was bad WHEN I WAS A CHILD but I think even as an adult you are much worse then I was when I WAS SMALL AND BOSSY!!

Its obvious to me (and probably everyone else) that you think you are supirior, both mentally and physically and people see that and of course are not going to want to be around ya, or date ya or even listen to ya, if you come across as this online and ive never met ya, i can only imagine what a pain in the ass you must be in real life...

Sorry to be so rude, but I think that you need to look at yourself in the mirror and realize it is you with the problem and not everyone else.

I feel the exact same way, especially on forums, no one ever replies to my posts and im super nice! sure I may swear up a storm but it's never directed at anybody.

Im also a notorious thread killer, as soon as I post on a thread the thread dies.

I bet this thread will only last a couple more posts now before it withers away JUST because I posted on it. If it lasts any longer I will jump for joy.

My friend. . . .

I think it would help if you worked a little more on listening, and showing the people to who (whom? whatever.) you are listening the kind of respect they would wish to be shown.

Meanwhile, I hope you're able to deal with the frustration all right.


It's very hard to feel not listened to.

That said, you are a bit abrasive at times. . .

Please tell me this is sarcasm?

And if I am always the first to show respect to others, and they still give me nothing but crap? There are people who my coworkers curse on a constant basis, being some of the worst, most harsh individuals we have ever had the displeasure of dealing with. However, when I am around others, I ALWAYS use "Sir", "Ma'am", "please", "thank you", and stay on my best behavior.

There are people who have tried to have me killed, drugged on illegal narcotics, and institutionalized on falsified diagnoses who I still acknowledge with my best behavior while in their company. And I am not doing enough to show respect to them? I have been through hell and back, only to be told I have to bend over to take more of a social raping? Is that right?

As for the frustration, I'm certain a 5 to 12 mile run will prove effective. I will be content as long as I can keep up with my designated projects for my weekend. The company toolbox prototype needs to be built, and there's a novel to be written.

My advice to you is to cease with incorporating those words into your vocabulary. Change your behavior, too. Stop being so wrapped up in adherance to others. There comes a time to respect (approx. 5% of your time), and there comes a time to not give a s**t anymore (approx. 95% of the time). If you are receiving nothing in return for your good behavior, then vindicate yourself from it. Positive results follow instantaneously. I promise.

Hey goatman, perhapse my previous post was a tad harsh, im really sorry you feel so done wrong in life, and that has something to do with it im sure. We have all been done wrong, but it sounds like you have had it much worse then at least myself, im sorry your life has been like this, its very difficult to know what to do socially I too find myself on my best behavior sometimes and still get treated like s**t but I guess thats life.

I have no advice other then to find what you want to acomplish in your short time on this rock and fight as hard as you can for it, for I hope in doing that you will find happyness in the end.

I know I founght, and at the age of 25 am only half way their... actually less then half way... and all I want is simple, I can die a happy man if I live long enough to attain the American dream, a modest living, and to watch y children grow up, then everything in my life can then fall apart, and I can still die a very happy person.

SOmetimes its the simplest things that provide the greatest amount of satisfaction/pleasure!

Respect is not a phrase book. It is an approach of understanding, of willingness to listen and accept, and of willingness not to impinge on the values of those you interact with.

Most people can sense the difference between these things; even if you can't read them, the chances are significant that they can at least read you that much.

Based on how I've heard you speak of various individuals, I suspect that this true, underlaying respect may be something you would want to work on.



People who try to have you killed, drugged, or institutionalized as you describe are not merely disrespectful; unless acting in self defense, those people are phychotic, not merely disrespectful. You owe them nothing; if you treat them with courtesy, which is what you describe above, power to you for being the better man. Behave to them as best fits your values and your interests.

It is important, though, not to confuse those individuals who have absorbed the phychoses of our culture so completely that they act them out coercively with people in general. Many, probably most, individuals, however, wouldn't dream of engaging in such acts as you have described. They deserve for you to give them a chance on their own merits- and you are unlikely to see the good in them if that chance isn't founded on the sort of underlaying respect I've described above.




Good luck with it all.