Attempted

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I was wondering for any of you that have ever tried to commit suicide. How did you try and what happen and why did you try and what happen. Like the story behind it I suppose.

If I ever tried I would succeed.. Aside from that I seem to grow more and more self destructive as each day passes. Before my negative energy was focused on others when I was convinced there was nothing "wrong" with me. Not only that but I was also convinced I was a god of evil.. (long story). Anyway, these days now that Ive recognised my problems I see how its mostly ultimately my fault I take it out on myself instead. At least Im not the monster I used to be. However I do continue to enduldge in darkly treasures and earthly pleasures.. But I know that no matter what I do I will remain as myself, ie, "screw up aspie".. That will never change..

Although I want to die, I'd never be able to kill myself.

Sometimes I want to die...
and I would succeed if I tried.

but I believe I'd just have to face it all over again...
only just a little more deeply scarred next time.

.. and then the sorrow and despair pass.. and I remember that which is good about me.

Everybody has something good.

thought about it many times.
attempted...three times.
why? because i thought i hated myself, but obviously didn't hate myself enough or i would have succeded.
some days it just takes me longer to figure out that i DO have things to live for. i tend to forget that a lot.

i've felt suicidal twice in my life but i'm too cowardly even to hold a butter knife towards my chest

i did and failed (obviously, otherwise i wouldnt be able to post it). i bought a small barbeque, got some coals, light them up in my bedroom, closed my door and window, and went to sleep.

i woke up in the morning feeling very very groggy. like half my brain got fried or something. i got up and saw my bedroom door wide open.

im glad i failed though. i managed to laugh now whenever i think about it. well, good experience i guess. i was afraid i got a permanent brain damage. i couldnt walk straight for half a day. my left arm couldnt move properly. but i think i recovered well both physically and mentally.

i have never attemped. i know i would fail becuase i wouldnt bear to dissapoint people around me by dying

I did it and still have the scars on my face and my back shattered in 5 places.
there are worse things than wanting to die, and that is living with the pain of trying to die and failing badly.

also getting up your courage once, and failing, can put you off of ever doing it again. I never realized that before, but now I do.

So now I live. go figure.

Merle

I hope nobody got offended by me asking this question. But simply my conclusion as of right now, we are forced to live even if we cant take it which really sucks in my opinion. I personally dont care whether people say "Is it worth it to die". I dont hold life up to a high degree. Admittedly there are 2 reasons why i'd ever want to kill myself. One yes the pain but the other to spite people. People say they care about me and then do sh***y things to me. Yes ok, I guess u only say you care because its the humane thing to do. Im talkin quite rationally in my brain right now, Im not in a meltdown right now, nor am I cronically depressed. I still get up every mornin and do the s**t I have to do for the day. I dont just lie around, I dont wanna flunk outta college, understanding the fact that living is not an indivisual choice. It was forced upon me. I hope nobody is offended by my opinion.

i agree that life isnt some kind of a 'god's gift' to us. we're just living creatures that just happened to have a higher state of intelligence due to evolution. and we're given survival instict that makes it very hard for us to kill ourselves. even if we plan it perfectly, our survival instict will kick in in the last moment and stop our suicide attempt.

it is not cowardice to escape from unfair prosecution that life has put is in.

I tried using speeding night-time traffic on a busy road.
The cars and trucks were too smart for me and eventually my parents "rescued" me.

Although at the time, I felt like my life was over and that the best I could to was to remove myself from it, I'm glad that I didn't succeed and that I wasn't badly injured.

Impossibly, life picked up and where I thought I was going to lose my family, I now have them for keepers - and even have a second child (I only had one then).

If you end it - it's forever
If you try to end it but fail, you could be injured forever.

The bottom line - don't do it.

Although I certainly have considered suicide in several instances in my life, I'm not the kind of person to simply let everything I am end in such a pathetic manner. Sometimes I humor myself by thinking, rather than killing myself why don't I simply kill everybody else and watch the world turn to ashes around me?

Then I eat a bowl of Cheerios and feel a lot better, heh.

But in all seriousness, suicide is never the answer. Ever.

I did, in 4th grade--or rather, I was about to try with a bread knife. I didn't get far. My mom ran into the room. I didn't try again...didn't want to, after that. I just felt horrible. Felt guilty for it.

Thought about it many times, attempted just once.

Intentional OD of hydrocodone.

Went to sleep, and somehow woke up.