It's only the first DAY of the new year...

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...and already I'm having spiteful thoughts about my dad.

You see, I really had my heart set out on getting a cheese-steak sandwich from the local deli, who was still open...well, after being denied it yesterday, Dad said he was willing to take me this evening, no less then an hour ago...under the condition that I 'clean up my room'.

Now, have you ever had a moment when someone said something to you that was so f***ing insensitive, that you didn't even get mad; it was more like surprise: "Damn, that was blunt!", you'd think. Well, that's what happened to me. He KNOWS that talking about my bedroom makes me uncomfortable...but I got over the surprise and agreed to his terms.

Well, half-an-hour ago, we got back, and as soon as I set foot in the door, I set down my drinks and my supper, and made a beeline to the closet to get the vacuum out of the closet...and you know what? Mom immediately assumed I was either angry or 'punishing' myself! I think that burned me even MORE then Dad's blunt statement. So I just said I merely wanted to vacuum before I ate, so she let me. So I did...now my floor is cleaner, and my returnables are collected and down cellar...and it was PURELY OUT OF SPITE THAT I DID SO.

This has got to be a record...it's only the first day of the new year and already I wish my father ill-will. But you know what? I'm not gonna let his insensitivity get me down! I'm just gonna fill my head full of happy thoughts...of him finally BUYING THE FARM THIS YEAR!

Usagi1992

Can you become more independant, like using cabs or something? Inviting a buddy to go eat with you, or maybe go get takeout with you and eat at your house or theirs? Here we have a handicapped transportation service that I used when I wasn't allowed to drive (from MS, not AS). It's managed by the public transportation authority, your doctor has to fill out a form saying you need it. He could tell you about any such service in your area. Or how about public transportation?

Your father seems to be using your dependance on him against you. I think you should start coming up with alternatives so that when he demands something you are unwilling to do you can use the alternative - although that might backfire, if he then says "well, use your alternative - I'm tired of driving you around everywhere" the next time you need a lift.

Just a thought.

I'm sorry he's being such a jerk about helping you. the disrespect is maddening, I'm sure.

Well, KaliMa (cute name, btw),

He isn't always disrespectful like this. He just figured that since it was the start of a new year, he just wanted my room to have a clean start. I didn't wanna jump on it right away, but it's like I can't say no to him.

And remember, he is like 67...which gives him the right to be childish at times.

Did you ask your Dr? Or maybe Social Services, either at the local hospital or you may have a Social Worker of your own. I have a Social Worker at my medical insurance company. There should be something, so many disabled people work nowadays that either the government should have realized there was a need, or private industry should have realized there was a market.

The Ride, the service here in Massachusetts, charges $2 per ride, or $4 per round trip. That's less than the bus from the suburb I live in to Boston and back, and you get door-to-door service, no having to get to the bus or train stop. My Dr. had to fill out a form saying I couldn't walk to the bus stop.

Maybe check your state's website on the internet, they might have some program for the disabled.

Good luck. You shouldn't have to struggle to get to work every day.