What's on your mind right now?

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Just stopping by to wish everyone who reads this much love and kindness.

Sincerely, Boden

Haven't a clue what to get my mum for her birthday.

I think there’s a strong possibility of marriage here…..

Sometimes, when I read history related to wars, it feels as if I'm reading a novel about traumatized individuals and abusive relationships.

Except they're not individuals. They're a collective of people with collective traumas.


Really, it isn't a surprise.

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Usually I eat breakfast, lunch and dinner. However since June last year, after morning bowel movement, I get to work and have to defecate again. My slave plantation does not have enough toilets, according to Building Code. Day laborers and customers clog the litter boxes once every couple of days. Janitors often in the litterbox. Hand dryer and idiots too loud. Echo chamber. Midsection feels tired having to take four bowel movements a day.

Considering, from now on, skipping either breakfast or lunch. And just eating the same amount (or slightly less).

Intermittent fasting

_____________________

My slave plantation recently went through a reorganization and things are getting even worse than usual. Considering getting a different job. But it took a long time to get this job. Plenty of jobs had the nerve to make my worthless corpse redundant. So maybe nobody will ever hire my worthless corpse again. Also my slave plantation is hard to get fired from, compared to other companies. (Even though it is still "at will" employer.)

_________________

39 nothing accomplished.

Almost 40 years old

Academic dismissal
Made redundant from all the jobs
Evicted
Dumped by all the "friends"

Clinically depressed
Anxiety disorder
Off leash dogs
Homeless encampment

Zero academic, athletic, occupational, financial, social or emotional accomplishments

Spent the day alone. Did not interact with anyone. Briefly considered offering to hang out with Dena but whatever. She's often late and she talks too much. She says "what?" Too much.

Exhausted lately. Pretty soon I will be too injured, sick or old to do my job.

Involuntary reclassified
Disparate impact
Constructive dismissal

Telecommuting jobs


Tool rental bill and another bigmouth idiot at work had the nerve to remark that I ate too much artisan cheese bread and that they were on strict diets. (Rolls eyes). s**t I have eaten from McDonald's and the food cart, zero times. Criticize someone else's lunch, would you please?

You should probably ask her to marry you if it looks like it's there.

Thinking about the things my father taught me. Thinking about my last words to him and how they were met with nothing.

IgG reactions... Hmmm...

But how to know... Which does which?


I'll start with the most obvious of all -- rice.
But I already tried that. It alarmed too many people. I hate it.

Yet that's not an excuse.
There's still I haven't tried yet -- swallowing my pride enough to make a pass and stop their goddamned fussing for once instead of sneaking around.

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The lug nut supplier for Xfinity and Truck series is shipping non-conforming parts but the teams are being penalized. One team reported a box with 250 lug nuts only having 57 that were within spec. NASCAR needs to either fix the issue on the supplier end or stop punishing teams for using the parts they've been told are good.

I think the guy my daughter is not exactly dating might be on the spectrum. I think so, so much in fact, that I bet her fifty dollars he was. Now I hope I don't lose that bet. We shall see.

I see you haven't signed in to facebook recently. I am torn between "must be nice to not need facebook" and "I hope you're alright."

And I know you don't notice when I disappear for a while.

I don't just need the space.
I also need the security and certainty.

It's not a lot to ask.
But why can't just be as long as I'm not alone?!

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Sinus infection...drifting through the evening...

Like Morrissey, I'm still ill...

Thrashing around while still bound, but with the confidence I’ll break free in the end.

Having more problems as a female than as an autistic.
Autism gets worse now because of "this". Not because I was traumatized or any of that social emotional crap.

But because I'm a female whose body is still unpredictable.
Does this ever get better with age?! Or better yet, does this get better after menopause or something?


I'm not even 30 yet.
And if 25 is supposedly the peak years, then why that's not the case with mine?

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Hopefully you break free there blazingstar. I kinda know that feeling.

Sorry Edna3362, male so I can't help. Which is an interesting thought though, as I can't say my sex has affected Autism for me (other than interests, but that's the same for almost everyone). Hopefully you feel better soon.

As for me,

Wondering what I did wrong. Hurting. Ambiguity. Not knowing. Thinking of good things though to take away that hurt.