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It is still weird to write something like this in English;

"U nohw waat, aim tayrd. Dee lak of slip is mayking mi fuhsi."

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Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

Drowning in mangoes.
New computer program for work is incredibly poorly executed and incredibly slow.

I have been told that the Agency did not have enough money to buy totally customized software for our incredibly complex work, so instead they bought one off the shelf and paid to have workarounds programmed in.

Literally everything is a workaround, 20 clicks just to get where you have to start, and each click requires the computer to "think about" the input and go to the next field. And that does not count a login, password and phone confirmation and then another two screens to work through to get to where the 20 clicks start. It does not autosave and it will randomly boot you off, even if you are actually working on it, thereby losing the work. It has taken a three minute job and moved it into 20 or 30 minutes or more if it freezes up and we have to go to IT or the Agency for further work before we can get back to what we were doing. I can no longer get my job done.

Lots to do today. I have a busy week coming up.

Because of extreme heat today in Portland, I do not think I will be going anywhere outside of the area of Portland where I live with my family.

One person
A woman too
Can take away a lot
Damage and nobody else will know
Irreparably
For no reason.
Illegal but hard to prove.
No medical procedure that I know of can fix what she did.
That one action took away
Grace
Dignity
Marriage
Peace of mind
Health.

I have a sudden and extreme craving for banana bread. I love banana bread so freaking much.

I've been having worse allergic reactions to fruits and veggies lately, and my meds only protect the stomach. But I sometimes do a bit better with cooked items, so it may be time to make myself a test subject again. For science!!

ironic that the ones with charmed lives who wish life were longer, have not a clue about the situation of those who were born under a bad star who wish death would come for them already.

i think a lot about certain people who have normal kids who will prob never be bullied, and who themselves were/are bullies. the justice.. none..hence why i HAVE to believe in an afterlife/ day of Judgement - some sort of explanation and accountability -
for any peace of mind in this moment. otherwise i'd be insane with anger 24/7

as per Dr. Laura, which my mom told me she had said--

my mom was one of her biggest fans when i was growing up -
she would make notes during her show, she learned a lot and lots of points brought up she had never thought of..
she even called in many times though never got through.
Dr Laura was Jewish and surprisingly her values overlapped with my mom's totally and subsequently my mom would pass them on to us (if appropriate/relevant)

found a book by her at the library 3 years ago- in honour of my mom decided to read it.
it was discussing her being slandered/attacked en masse, and things she endured, what got her through it. of course, she had total family understanding/ support and a relatively well-off, educated, privileged life- which a lot of people aren't lucky enough to have.
too heavy a subject matter for me and i put it down - feeling very disheartened.