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Where I come from we say "Taxi!"

Scunthorpe

Whiskey! (Matt Berry used to say that in Snuff Box, when he was in a huff. That was a weird series, that was).

Anyway what's for breakfast dad

Eek! You've just reminded me I need to put the oven on to pre-heat for the toast or it dries it up too much before the surface is toasted. I'm always forgetting that.

It's egg on toast like it always is.

Nice
Enjoy it man

My tea's nearly ready

Thanks, it was quite a good one. I suppose with the time zone difference it'll be your time for prayers, Peter Rabbit story, and bed soon.

I've only just had my tea

Are they letting you stay up as a treat for being good?

we get a bit of an extension on the weekend

Why you so chipper anyway
Are you performing later

No I'm having a slack day till something spoils it like remembering something urgent or my killjoy conscience.

I don't know why I'm so quick-fire today. Could be high blood pressure from the excitement of last night or the joys of spring sending too much oxygen to my brain. I hope I don't blow a gasket.

Why what happened last night

Oh that was the performance where I did Cotton Fields instead of Crossroads to appease them like the coward I am. There's a lot of new social contact and that always gets me a bit wired, having to think fast and being scared of pissing them all off. You can imagine the strain, hiding all the religious, cultural, and political differences, and still trying to be immediate. It can last quite a while afterwards. It was much easier in Leicester and Sheffield where they get annoyed if you aren't offensive. I'd have picked California but I didn't have much choice, and the rural Arkansans are good eggs really.

Well how long have you been there then

A good few years, but I've spent a lot of the time as a mysterious recluse. I was doing a bit of music a while back but moved away from the place I'd got used to, and then I had an operation and they told me I couldn't play the guitar for 6 months, so I was out of the loop for a while, and now I'm starting again. I hardly ever socialise except when I perform music. And I spend quite a bit of time in the UK where all my friends have moved away or have got really busy so I'm left to rot on my own. After a lot of solitary confinement it's quite a shock to the system suddenly having a box of people looking at me again.