"We kill threads"; Threadkiller Society

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ZIS EEZ SPARTAAAAAAAAA!! !! !! !

I need to remember my password for photo bucket, so I can start linking images.
I tried going off my facebook but it didn't accept it.

Personally, I am almost as good at forgetting passwords as I am at killing threads.

Sylkat

I found it.

So how does one, pray tell, enter the Threadkiller Society?

I seem to be showing some natural talent and am running a pretty good TK average lately. Is there an application ? Or must one be nominated ? Is there a painful ordeal ? If I kill this thread what does that mean ?

Oh I see... It's like an audition! What fun!

Well then, to begin I shall treat you to an encore of my first public performance, in Miss Block's class, 1st Grade, Flying Saucer School, Roosevelt, NY.

Ah hem....

Three Little Kittens

Three little kittens they lost their mittens, and they began to cry,
"Oh mother dear, we sadly fear that we have lost our mittens."
"What! Lost your mittens, you naughty kittens!
Then you shall have no pie."
"Meeow, meeow, meeow, now we shall have no pie."
The three little kittens they found their mittens,
And they began to cry,
"Oh mother dear, see here, see here
For we have found our mittens."
"Put on your mittens, you silly kittens
And you shall have some pie"
"Meeow, meeow, meeow,
Now let us have some pie."
The three little kittens put on their mittens
And soon ate up the pie,
"Oh mother dear, we greatly fear
That we have soiled our mittens."
"What! soiled you mittens, you naughty kittens!"
Then they began to cry, "Meeow, meeow, meeow"
Then they began to sigh.
The three little kittens they washed their mittens
And hung them out to dry,
"Oh mother dear, do you not hear
That we have washed our mittens."
"What! washed your mittens, you are good kittens."
But I smell a rat close by,
"Meeow, meeow, meeow" we smell a rat close by...

OK. Looking good.

Next I will scan my doctors report on my Gall Bladder Surgery and give a thrilling counterpoint eyewitness account of what it felt like and how I have coped with the loss of something I was very attached to.

But wait. I have a question for the Thread Killer Applicant Committee. How long exactly must a thread be inactive before it is declared dead ? And if I should die before the determination is made, how will that affect the process ? Do you think I should draft up a kind of Living Will that lays down in laymen, and laywomen's terms what my wishes are in such a circumstance?

Well I guess you can get back to me on those. Probably speechless at the moment, and I understand. But I am not one of those guys who promises things and then makes excuses for not having the goods.

An Air Force Light Colonel of Japanese extraction deleted my Gall bladder. You can be sure I didn't make any jokes about Pearl Harbor, Noooo Sir. As far as how it felt... I haven't a clue. I was knocked out completely.



But I did experience a sense of loss and penned these words soon after...

Your Gall Bladder won't be going home with you Tonite

While I lay weak and weary
Opon a Hospital Bed so Dreary
I heard a tap, tap, tapping at my mindless door.
Quoth the Upper Intestine, WTF?

Er... You probably don't need to hear anymore... Don't want to overload such fine and respectable Application Approval Judges like yourself. And I know its more of a formality, not quite a rubber stamping (I would never entertain such a slanderous and false charge), but maybe a rubber... rubber... stick. Yeah a rubber sticking.
It won't be any time at all as I present the next part of my multimedia portfolio.

This pointless thread was created in Mar 25, 2008, and its still going strong.

Maybe so, maybe so... But this pointless human was born on Feb 23 1958 and it's still going strong.

And is very good at killing things!

Well, to be honest I am not very good at killing things, except my meat by overcooking and perhaps myself. I still have a very touching note in my graduation yearbook from my very best friend. It was something like this... 'It would be best all around if you join the Army and get yourself killed you Maniac!'

But come to think of it, one attempt I do remember fondly. Trying to skate the West abuttment of the Verrazano Bridge (Brooklyn Side). How we didn't succeed still amazes me.



So that ends my application and in closing would like to thank all those who never responded to my posts and help make me what I am today, for there are no winners in the Wrong Planet Kills Threads competition. Yes, maybe only one will be selected as the very worst, and allowed to join the TKs, but all can go home knowing they too are real losers. So you can all pat yourself on the back for a job bad done!

But hearken to that Aspergerian. Don't you hear ? The nothing. This thread breathes only shallowly. The pulse is fading.

Only you are left. And I see you may also be of primate kind, as I am. Is that your true form then ? You show it openly ? Is that wise do you think ? I never show mine casually. It hides behind a layer of masks. But seeing as it is only you and I, I see no reason not to show my face too and breathe the air freely.

Take all the time that you want. I'll just invent the Xylophone while I am waiting. And... ponder the utility of making the entrance requirement of something, it's destruction.

Take your time, we will just wait till your done feeding this thread with your posts,, then we come back and try give it a proper burial with a post of our own.

All done,
Good Health to your thread