What's on your mind right now?

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I watched a YouTube video today and it made me sad for allistic people & wonder if this is 'normal' for people who aren't autistic.

It was about the life of a woman and it was all done through what people thought of her. Some of it was normal. But then there were bits where she changed her behaviour for others.

It started with her lying and saying she liked Danger Mouse when she didn't know what it was then when she didn't like it. Then she was dancing in the school playground and people made fun of her so she didn't dance again for five years.

Then she grew up and did a job she didn't want because her family wanted her to do it. It made her an unpleasant person. She didn't quit or change her behaviour, she just accepted this as her 'role'.

Some guy proposed to her and she didn't want to marry him. But her mother was telling her how awful it would be to die old and alone. So she married him. Then she had kids with him because that was the 'normal' thing to do. Even though she wasn't into him.

The rest of the video was normal except her dying young which can happen to anyone. But it made me think - do 'healthy' NTs do this? It seems very unhealthy. All based on dishonesty done to fit in. Never being true to oneself.

The marriage thing struck me as particularly wrong since it's such a life changing thing for both parties, don't marry people you're not into! Don't do romantic/sexual stuff with people you're not into!

But even the smaller things, how sad to not dance because some other kids made fun of it.

Made me very glad of all the times in life someone has asked me something and I've given the honest answer back rather than the 'fit in' answer back and all the times I've done something because I wanted to do it and didn't care what others thought. As long as you're behaving morally, other people's opinions of you shouldn't come into it.

Maybe part of this is because I associate the 'what would others think' so much with my worst years of having social anxiety.

Risking another heart attack...

^ looks lush

What's the thing at 11 o'clock , between the toast and the ? ( slice of gammon ? )

Best buy has a hiring event today and tomorrow. Trying to go

Dress code. Nothing to wear.

It has three jobs open

Applied for and got rejected for one out of three jobs

The "experience with consumer electronics" is so vague. Literally, I have that job skill. But that's like saying, "of course I am good with numbers because I can add one digit numbers".

"Beggars can't be choosers"

"Don't judge a book by the cover"



Superficial and materialistic

Yesterdays hiring event penis had the nerve to tell me that I was wearing jeans and tennis shoes and come back next week. He acted so innocent. "Is everything ok?". He doesn't have authority or skill to "help". Idiots "help" you one teaspoon and claim a gallon of credit





f**k that ass hole

f**k mister redelings


Anxiety gone haywire

Graceful degradation


No motivation, meaning, purpose,


On Sunday after the lesson, my only friend told me that she was going to hang out with her sister instead of me. Her sister didn't even take the class


That b***h can hang out with her sister any time but she can't hang out with me any time


Don't change the subject


Diversion



"Life" rapidly getting worse

f**k "life"

Itchy shins last night


Nothing to do all day long

We have something similar to that in the US----but we also have shredded "hash browns," too.

They can either consist of potatoes alone----or they can have corned beef hash and other ingredients, too.

... On which angles should we tackle, yes?

On the restrictive side of rationality; logic and empirical evidences?
On theories and conclusions about interpreted datas from various lenses, from plausible to impossible to the absurd?
Or on the emotional and living side of things; both validating and invalidating means?

Consequences or root causes? The 'right' or the 'wrong'? Global or local?
What do you favor? What do you think others would favor? How do you interpret this, and how do you not assume to interpret this?


Please.
Just don't ask me about how the climate is here.
I have my job here as a physical resident citizen of a country that happened to be ranked as the most vulnerable, and you have yours somewhere else even if that includes screams of affirmations or denials whether you are living the whole thing or not.

And because all true... And they're all also false. Pursue your own angle if you will.

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.

Took testosterone shot

The some of the testosterone fell out but whatever

Dr etchiverri email



Felt like gorging as usual

Having no friends is taking a long term toll

Toll collector

Tawse

Cane

Pants down

Vulva blister

Reasonable accommodation, dress code exemption

Today was kind of hot

Today was perfect

Felt invisible

36 too old for neuroplasticity

Too young to be treated properly

Too far gone

The chicken and hummus we're good

Wanted cheese too

The egg tasted expired

Dazed and confused

Frazzled and don't know why

Signed up for two hiring event tomorrow


Applied for a job at the second one

Rejected

Applied for a different job

Nothing to do tomorrow s**t

Loser

Loner

Brain damage

MRI

I no longer see college as doing something else besides work. I just see it as a chore.

Calling the EPL the Premier League is almost as annoying as calling a baseball series The World Series when nobody else plays in it.

I kind of get it though because they don't have rules about how many English should be on the pitch at one time so you could have a game only English cos it was played in England & between teams from English cities but no Englishman played.

Theoretically having a rule you need 2 players of that country on the pitch per team at all times should help that country succeed. Idk why it doesn't. Maybe in a bigger country it would but Cal Mac and James Forrest become crap when they put on dark blue.

I'm normally pro immigration & don't like 'they're taking our jobs' rhetoric but when it comes to billionaire football, they just buy the best players & the rich get richer.