The most traumatizing thing you've seen?

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^ That sounds horrible. I've been lucky enough to get out of jury duty because of my disability but I have to let them know I'm "disabled" which is annoying. I don't think I could handle that.

I went in hoping to get it. My job pays while in jury duty and it seemed like a great opportunity to experience something that most people avoid and as a result only a chunk of people have. They actually asked everyone who actually wanted to be there and myself and about half of the others who said that they did want to be there ended up on the jury.

It turned out the guy had pleaded guilty to the crime 7 years earlier, and got a retrial on a technicality... Had we found him not guilty we would have been letting a monster out of jail on a loophole. (which was the real difficult part)

One of the positive things of it was, since nobody was allowed to talk about the case... while we all waited around and stuff... nobody was really social or anything... we all sorta would find our own spot and entertain ourselves and not bother talking... so I didn't have to pretend like I wanted to hear what people I didn't know and didn't have a connection to thought of anything... I was quite grateful for that.

If called again... I would be someone to raise my hand to be on a jury again... but I would also make it clear that the last one had a profound psychological effect on me, and see if I could get on a civil case instead :p

It's a very big responsibility and not a pleasant one but has to be done hopefully by those who are able and equipped well enough to handle it. I went through too much of that sort of gore growing up to be able to or I would sign up when my name was called. It's interesting but very hard too. My nervous system is shot both from a neurological standpoint and from too much prior trauma and likewise disqualifies me in most cases. Thanks for sharing that it's very interesting.

This:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdbyG2MrBHk&ob=av2e[/youtube]

And/Or This:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLW3_Ieckm4[/youtube]

I'm not just traumatized by The Only Way is Essex, but also the other so-called "reality" shows...

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XhnN54tHjkI[/youtube]

a be-heading.....don't watch one, it's bad, i can still hear it.

Both of these are WEll KNOWN events..

The Challenger Exploding over & over on CNN. Awful!
&
9/11. I actually was watching the news when the second plane hit the WTC tower. Another one played over & over. On ALL TV stations I had then.
****************************************
I'm suprised nobody said these. I can also add STS Columbia's sad fate on re-entry over this part of the USA.

Sincerely,
Matthew

DISCO.

I'm still in recovery.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrTz5xjmso4&ob=av2e[/youtube]
This track.

My family lived in the Philippines until I was about 6 or so. One day I watched our neighbors slaughter a pig by cutting its throat. I was probably about 3 or 4 years old at the time. The pig was squealing desperately as they opened up its throat and blood flowed down into a bucket. The strongest parts of the memory is the ear splitting squeal and the huge amount of blood that poured over the knife.

When I was really young (about 8 or 9) I saw a dead cat by the side of the road. I've always loved cats so much and that was the first time I ever saw a dead animal and understood what it was. I'd seen dead animals before but I could never understand the concept of death until then.

Something that's less traumatizing now than it was at the time was seeing my father go into a blind rage and throw all sorts of bowls and cutlery at my mum. I was about 3 so the memory's very faint, but I know I was really scared and wanted him to stop. He was very violent towards her but I didn't see it often.

The year 2003-2012.

My parents being physically violent with each other to the point where one was hospitalized.. and they were forced to have counseling.

For a long time I've been like the "dog" in the movie "Dog the Bounty Hunter". When he's in a grocery shop and there's a robbery going on. Everybody's in the store are terrified, but he still just keeps browsing the store like nothing's out of the ordinary. Because he's so used to the violence, that it is ordinary for him. That's how I am now. For instance, a few months ago I was out clubbing with two friends. One of them had a traumatic childhood, and the other one didn't. Me and the friend with a traumatic childhood just stood like nothing was going on, only a meter or two away from the fight. We just looked at it and then continues our conversation. The fight ended by the cops taking one of the guys, and an ambulance taking the other, which was at the time unconscious. Afterwards we looked around and saw that our other friend wasn't with us anymore and we saw her hiding far away, because she was so scared. That's the first time I realized that maybe my reaction to witnessing violence wasn't so normal.

Although, the most traumatic event's I've witnessed, are pointed towards me.
Dad broke my arm when I was four years old, and my knee when I was six or seven years old. He's also broken a few ribs that never got treated. Not really sure when that happened, but they were noticed at an MRI a few years ago when I broke a rib for other reasons. The doctors told me I also had old broken and fractured ribs. Could bee something more, who knows.
I've been through a lot of sexual abuse in my life. Some in a very early age, 3-5 years old maybe. One when I was 14. One when I was 15. One when I was 22. And one when I was 23.
I was also bullied at school, for 8 years. Both verbally and physically.

Although I wish one thing would have affected me. About 8 years ago I had a dog that I loved very much. When he was about three years ago he got extremely sick and died 24 hours after getting sick. Mom was driving me with him to the vet's office, but he died in my arms when we were at the parking lot by the vet's office. After being autopsied, I was told that he had a very extreme case of HCC. Which is a type of infectious hepatitis in dogs.
For years I felt like a horrible person for not having felt anything when he died and wondered what the heck was wrong with me. Mom cried a little when we were at the vet's office and the vet told us he was dead, but I felt nothing at all. He was my dog, and I loved him more than anything or anybody. How could a be so cold and feel nothing at all.

Phew! Sorry for the long post. I guess I need to visit my foster-dad. I usually down-load all the s**t going on in my head on to him when my head get's crowded. That usually makes it go away and results in me being able to sleep.

This is extremely traumatizing to hear

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkMWdI2IKiw[/youtube]

I don't know. Perhaps Three Guys One Hammer, perhaps the Dagestan Massacre video.

my cat dying, rodent getting run over by truck with many wheels, woman getting beaten up by man on street, my dad in a rage, old man masturbating on train, dracula and when i was a kid i thought i saw ghosts.