Aspies and lying

Post Reply New Topic

I guess it is a type of deception.

Really depends on the kind of lying.

If it's rude or such, I sometimes tend to smile or laugh, which gives it away.

But for serious stuff, hiding secrets or such, I've found to be very good at. When it seems like something serious, and I have a real motivation to not let the truth out, I'm pretty good at that.

I'm scarily good at lying. Whether it was a coping mechanism I developed due to my abusive childhood, or something I was born knowing how to do... I do not know.

I chose not to lie these days, though. At one point I got so bad that I would have been diagnosed as a pathological liar if people had actually seen through it. I never want to spend such energy creating those intricate webs again. It was beyond exhausting and not worth it at all.

I do lie by omission sometimes. It's not usually on purpose, though. I just never know what's relevant and what's not.

Here is a link to an mp3 podcast about deception from RadioLab, a show on National Public Radio here in the US.Link

I found it very interesting and well done. It is not ASD specific, but gets into facts of interest on this subject, such as what is different about the brains of pathological liars, as discovered on fMRI scans. It also covers self deception (at the end) and covers the topic of happiness and self deception.

I'm an aspie an I lie, only I'm not too good at it and will eventually fess up

I can get away with lying about some things when I go to the job center. Because my personal advisor thinks people with AS are honest, he can believe me more and not check up on anything because he just trusts me. Obviously I try not to lie too much otherwise things will start becoming obvious. I keep it at a steady balance, and I'm an expert. A proper expert. In fact, I might start a new thread to help Aspies who end up getting found out with lies and are caught out. That has happened to me before, but my brain can hand me another lie to cover me up in less than half of a second, so my denial is extended and I never get found out properly.

I try not to use my ''lie powers'' too much because it can get you in a mess, but using a lie on the odd occasion can be easy.

Actually, I think all of this makes it easier for us to lie, because people can't figure out if we're lieing by just watching our body language. This is what I noticed a long time ago; people couldn't really tell when I was telling a serious lie or when I was being completely honest and often called me out on lies when I wasn't lieing at all. We can easily use this confusion to our benefit if we so choose.

The question isn't if we can lie, because I believe we can be remarkably good at it, the question is if we want to lie. I don't lie very often simply because I tend to have no need for it, but when the need arises I'm well prepared to deal with it.

I have lied as a reflex to being accused of something.
I have lied to protect another person's secret, albeit badly.
I usually don't bother to lie, because

1.there is a whole set of confusions involved in forming a good lie.
2.lies need to be recalled & applied to future situations. I have enough trouble applying talk.
3.lies don't promote honest interaction or solution to problems, which I value.
4.you need to make proper eye contact to lie effectively.
etc etc etc.

I don't bother lying because:
-I do not do things that would provoke some people to lie about later (steal, cheat, etc.) However, I have done some mildly bad things like pilfer a couple of pieces of candy from a jar or something, in which case, when asked, I say, "Yes, I took some."
-The same things OddFiction said about eye contact.
-The same things OddFiction said about the confusions.
-I value truth from other people and I'm upset when they lie, so I don't lie because it upsets a lot of people.
-I'm frankly a very bad liar. The few times I have tried it, I get caught very quickly, so I just decide it's not worth it. With most people, they may be mad at you for doing something, but when you do something and then lie about it, they're madder than before. It's not worth all the trouble.

I'm a really good liar. Mostly I lie so I won't have to go to school. It works really well.

Unfortunetly my incredibly Aspie-ish brother sucks at lying and always blows my cover (unintentionally, though).

I'm accused of lying a lot when I do tell the truth. I $#ck at explaining things sometimes & I had lots of behavior problems as a kid, problems in school, problems with my parents ect. I was in trouble a lot & even when I would tell the truth; I would be so nervous about things that I said things the wrong way & got things confused so people assumed I was lying. My family has a very hard time believing me about things because of that. However I am fairly good at lying sometimes if I'm not caught off guard. I do not think fast.