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Yes, I believe you do!

I really don't know what to do with my hair at the moment. It seems to be growing, but is still not as long as I'd like it before dying it again yet. Well, I have 3 weeks before I have 3 weeks where I don't have to go anywhere unless I want to or the group I'm working with arranges it, maybe I'll dye it after that. It'll be April by then.

Here's a radical idea - shave it off - Sinéad O'Connor style - that'll shock 'em. Vanity is a curse!

I could cut my head off and people still wouldn't notice me!

I'm sorry littlecat. It just annoys me when people carry on about beutifying themselves because there's nothing I've ever done in all the years to improve myself that has made ANYONE interested in me and it's SO SAD! So LONELY - and to hear people carry on about love and relationships and how they choose to do their hair and how pretty they are and how much they're loved by a significant other REALLY RIPS MY GUTS OUT. I HAVEN'T BEEN WITH ANOTHER HUMAN FOR OVER 10 YEARS! I HAVEN'T EVEN HELD HANDS OR KISSED ANOTHER HUMAN IN OVER 10 YEARS.

If only I could change my hair and have people interested in me.If only there was incentive there to better my appearance in an effort to have someone like me. I've been alive 49 years. I've lost weight, dressed nicely, been clean and clean shaven, I built my muscles up, got a tan. NOTHING makes a difference - People look through me like I was made of glass. Lord knows, I've tried EVERYTHING but no-one's EVER been interested in me - never have - never will - Not even when I was young and had youth on my side.

Now, I'm an old man and it's not making it any easier but I'm still lonely. And the older I get, the less chance there is of getting someone. But I had 0 when I was younger. You can't get -1 partners so I guess it stays at 0 for the rest of my life.

Sorry for my meltdown but I'm so sick and tired of this life - seeing other people go into and out of relationships when I can't even get a friend, let alone a partner.

I'm so lonely.

It's not your fault and it was wrong of me to take it out on you but it just annoys the CRAP out of me when I see people worry about how they look because, no matter ho I look, no one sees me! And it's only getting worse with time!

I wish my hair mattered. I wish changing my hair would make people see me as attractive BUT THERE'S JUST NO INCENTIVE ANYMORE. I could glue a bucket on my head and people still wouldn't notice me. CHRIST THIS LIFE IS SO UNFAIR AND NOT WORTH LIVING!! !

Last edited by ImAnAspie on 23 Feb 2016, 6:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I went to Andrea's for lunch with two of my friends, Dean and Brad. We went to Walmart and London Drugs afterwards. I bought a Hogan's Heroes DVD that has the most favourite episodes of all time selected by die-hard fans. This song was playing on the radio and I was belting it out at the top of my lungs.

"Refugee"

We got somethin', we both know it, we don't talk too much about it
Ain't no real big secret, all the same, somehow we get around it
Listen, it don't really matter to me baby
You believe what you want to believe, you see

You don't have to live like a refugee
(Don't have to live like a refugee)

Somewhere, somehow, somebody must have kicked you around some
Tell me why you want to lay there, revel in your abandon
Honey, it don't make no difference to me baby
Everybody has to fight to be free, you see

[Chorus:]
You don't have to live like a refugee
(Don't have to live like a refugee)
No baby you don't have to live like a refugee
(Don't have to live like a refugee)

Baby we ain't the first
I'm sure a lot of other lovers been burned
Right now it seems real to you, but it's
One of those things you gotta feel to be true

Somewhere, somehow, somebody must have kicked you around some
Who knows maybe you were kidnapped tied up,
Taken away and held for ransom
Honey, it don't make no difference to me, baby
Everybody has to fight to be free, you see

[Chorus x2]

There's really nothing wrong with your looks at all, IAmAspie. Matter of fact, you look young for your age.

Oh, not now Cockney - I'm having a meltdown. Don't dismiss what I just had to say with something totally unrelated! I'm struggling here. Please don't belittle the hardship I'm going through!

Thanks Kraftie, but it's always the men who say that to me and that doesn't do me any good. Women just don't seem to notice me. What the hell have I done to live this horrible, miserable existence! WHY???

I can start to really recover.

Good song by the way.

I would bet, that if you posted your picture, that you'll have the ladies running towards you. Especially that picture of you with that cop car. Let me tell you something: chicks DIG cops.

Music will get me through. Music and Special Interests have always got me through:

I'm just an Immigration Officer now - Border Force