Make phoney Newspaper ads for other members.

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Wanted in Central London a curator for a new
Routemaster museum. Person with enthusiasm for
Routemasters only please 555-555-5454

Plane tickets from LA to New Zealand only $99 ! !! !
Good May 30 to June 10. Please call and leave a message
555-665-5555

FOUND


One highly inebriated chipmunk; answers to "Bob."

Will owner please reclaim.

Call 555-555-2376

Were you poison with Ecoli
at the New Orleans Olive Garden?
Please call Ashman&Ashman attorneys
at law. 555-SUE-THEM

I just threw inferno magic at all the Olive Gardens, after safely teleporting everyone out of course.

Wanted in Russia a curator for a new museum of
historical artifacts {including the body of Stalin}
of the motherland. Person with strong enthusiasm
of Russia only please call 555-555-6565

Tickets from San Francisco to Moscow only $100!! !! !!
Good March 1st to March 23rd!! !! !
Please call 555-323-2323 and leave a message!! !! !

Wanted: Sephiroth. Last seen carrying Jenova's head. Is armed and dangerous and should be approached with caution.

100 free video games of your choice for the best Mario impression!
South Australia

Call 0777 1337 1337 immediately!

Certified A&P Mechanic
"Have Tools, Will Travel"

Call DoubleFeed

1 888 555 4360

On Janauary 1st, a lotto drawing was held for $50,000. The winner was TheMachine1 , A Wrongplaneteer, a resident of UNKNOWN. The only problem is that TheMachine1 never claimed the huge cash prize. The winner had 6 months to claim the prize and was informed via email that they had won. Further attempts at contacting TheMachine1 by phone and mail failed. The prize was sponsored by Internet Advertisements and Millionaire Promotions Inc. A spokesperson for Millionaire Promotions stated "It's unfortunate that TheMachine1 didn't claim the prize. We tried several times to get in touch with TheMachine1 but were not successful. A new drawing will be held next month. We hope this time the winner will step forward." Millionaire Promotions feels that 6 months was more than enough time for a person to claim the prize. The deadline for claiming the prize was July 1st. It appears that TheMachine1 in no way attempted to conact Millionaire Promotions. This is the first time that someone has missed such a large prize awarded by Millionaire Promotions.

Late friday night in a guarded building just outside the Staples Center in Los Angeles, Deinonychus threw an after-show party. The guest of honor, however, didn't show up. One of their biggest fans, asperion , A Wrongplaneteer had been invited to stay with Deinonychus after the show. "We had mailed an invitation and plane tickets to asperion after learning from a friend of theirs how much of a fan they were." Said a spokesman for Deinonychus. "But after asperion failed to show up at the airport, numerous attempts were made at contacting asperion by phone, but we never got through." Deinonychus feels that such a missed opportunity is a sad one, especially since asperion was such a big fan. Maybe asperion's luck will change in the future, though. But it is highly doubtful, seeing as how this in many respects, was a once in a lifetime experience.

Thank you for making the Nose Pickers Society so successful. Without your continued support and donations, it would not be even close to what it is today.

We would like to welcome our newest members. We send our thanks out to all of them for stepping forward and becoming proud members of the Nose Pickers Society.

Mark Stewart, Tulsa
John Avery, Carson City
ahayes , a Wrongplaneteer, Laramie
Sarah Neilson, Omaha
Steve Alvin, Aguanga Hills
Alison Fields, Peterson
Brad Carlson, Essex

CALL 999/911 FOR A FREE SOCIAL CONVERSATION!! !

Your search for AnonymousAnonymous , a Wrongplaneteer + Portland has found the following results:

Displaying 1-10 of 75

1) Tom Harrold (Portland)
Assault With A Deadly Weapon

2) John Cramer (Portland)
Murder, Assault

3) Achmed Sakal (Portland)
Violation of Parole

4) AnonymousAnonymous , a Wrongplaneteer (Portland)
Unpaid Parking Tickets

5) Sally Jenkins (Portland)
Violation of Parole

6) Jose Garcia (Portland)
Breaking And Entering

7) Bill Johnson (Portland)
Violation of Parole

John Redcorn (Portland)
Grand Theft Auto

9) Alex Carson (Portland)
Armed Robbery

10) Brad Powers (Portland)
Assault With A Deadly Weapon

Early Wednesday morning, a woman walked into a small restaraunt in The Dirty South but instead of ordering a meal like the usual guests, walked straight into the women's bathroom and ran back out with an armful of toilet paper. The waitress working there that day tried to stop the woman from leaving the restaurant, but was not successful. Witnesses identified the woman as nirrti_rachelle , a Wrongplaneteer, a resident of The Dirty South. Police are still looking for nirrti_rachelle for further questioning. Later in the day, a few local trees were covered in toilet paper. They suspect that these two crimes may be related.

Lost. Have You Seen My Spine?

Late friday night in a small pharmacy in the United Kingdom a woman entered posing as a regular customer. She was dressed nicely and carried several red roses in her hand. She made her way to the back of the store where she then picked up a store display and ran out the door with it, leaving the roses scattered on the floor as she fled. 2 of the 3 other customers in the store at the time identified the woman as Anubis , A Wrongplaneteer, a resident of the United Kingdom.
It turns out that the store display that Anubis ran off with contained 30 disposable enemas. Police are still uncertain why anyone would need that many enemas. And they are still looking for Anubis for further questioning. The store owner had only recently set up the display as part of a 3 week promotion. "Maybe she was severly constipated and didn't know what else to do" the store owner later stated.