Do aspie women have it worse than aspie men?

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I think it's much lonelier to be an aspie female as opposed to an aspie male. My reasoning is because men make the majority of aspies they are more recognized and identifiable in a way among society.

This is a little paranoia of mine, but I think the world is becoming a geek/nerd-dominant place. You may think this is a good thing but I've always been told that I'm never geeky or nerdy enough despite my weird obsessions and interests. I rarely read books nor I do ever get good grades. In essence I'm not smart.

Plus it seems easier for a NT female to fall for an aspie male than it is for an NT male to fall for an aspie female without having some cruel hidden agenda behind it. Some people say that aspies are more prone to landing in an abusive relationship. If that's the case then...damn.

Fortunatly I dont worry about romantic relationships anymore but I still have difficulty making friends or having other people believe that I'm an aspie just because I look like any other girl.

oh yeah I can relate. Im the female aspie in my marriage and my husbands hidden agenda was the fact that he do have traits that I can feel is related to AS. Mostly is his lack of needs of having friends. He dont have friends, dont need friends or miss to have friends . He is fine with the excistence of me and his family. But I have the needs of friends and to be confirmed by others and not only him. In this way Im having it "worse" than him.....

Doesn't seem to be as much geared to aspie/autie females as males. I've also noticed NT females seem to be more tolerant (in an honest manner) than NT males like you said. It is lonely for all us aspies/auties (both female & male), but their is one bonus to being an aspie female if you like guys (don't care either way b/c I'm a demi or asexual). Simply put based on #'s ((their are like 4-5 times as many aspie/autie males as females or 4 out of 5 w/ an ASD are male/ only 1 out of 5 is female) (has this changed or are these specific #'s for gender ratio only in the US?)) aspie women (who like guys) have more options for finding partners within the aspie community than aspie men do (each woman has 4 options hypothetically if all aspie women (though I'm sure this is not the case) picked an apsie male partner). But I wished some of the stereotypes (that aspie/autie women are less intelligent than aspie men) would lessen more than they have. (Some people have thought I could not be an aspie/just ridiculously shy b/c I am female & am fairly/pretty smart )

Men have a difficult time then women who have AS if you want to go out and have friends then go out by yourself leave him at home and good time with your friends aspie men get called all sorts of names the women don't.

I think it would have to be lonelier to be an Aspie man. I believe that because men in general have the pressure of being more assertive in approaching the opposite sex in starting a relationship. At the risk of oversimplifying it, I'll say that all women really have to do is sit around, look pretty, and wait for a male. As an Aspie male, I'm EXTREMELY uncomfortable in that role.

That's not to say I'm incapable of forming relationships (I'm happily married, sorry ladies!). The way I got INTO relationships was by making myself as approachable as possible (reversing the above gender roles). My obsessions (I was once a band nerd superstar) had a lot to do with women approaching me. It was the few that stuck around long enough for me get comfortable with that I was able to be involved with.

The trouble I ran into was becoming obsessed with women to the extent that I didn't know how or when to let go of the relationship. The absolute lowest point for me and relationships was when I'd been with a severely codependent girl who knew about as much about functional relationships as I did. I eventually came to the conclusion that I'd be happier alone than I would trying to keep her happy. Beyond that I was involved in one other bad relationship; the others ended amicably before I got my "happily ever..."

My pursuit of the opposite sex involved a very painful development of "style" that seemed much more natural to my male peers. By contrast, I was involved in a similarly socially impaired but non-Aspie young woman. A certain genetic "defect" that had to do with aforementioned social impairment also gave her striking physical features that made her highly attractive (in my opinion, anyway). That made her easy to pursue, and we had a very good relationship. We broke up because it just wasn't meant to be, and while it made us both sad, we both knew it wouldn't work out. We're still friends, of course. The thing all my relationships have in common is right-place-right-time, not my physical/intellectual attractiveness or ability to sweet-talk a woman. Had circumstances been different, I don't think I'd have gotten quite so lucky!

i definately think so.

adding to what you've already mentioned, women do better in packs. they can protect each other, look out for one another. offer support, etc. i know that many aspie women do have friends, but many, like myself do not. this is one very big handicap that is rarely mentioned because male social groups work differently.

don't kid yourself. Women get called names, too. Having friends doesn't come easily with Aspie women, because the sensory issues of 'going out' are just as crippling for a woman as for a man. Being an Aspie woman does not mean we have women friends that we yukk it up with while the old man is stuck at home.

There is no 'typical' Aspie woman, there is no 'typical' Aspie man. We are all pretty specialized in our own personal syndrome. Saying men or women have the hardest time doesn't even approach the much more complex issue we are, male or female.

You have definitely hit the nail on the head here sinsboldly. I feel unable to go out and socialise a lot because I sometimes feel crippled by my ASD. And I certainly don't have female friends to 'yukk up to' either. I have also been insulted and called names throughout the course of my life. I'm so glad you pointed this out.

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I don't really like these 'which gender has it harder' topics. All I can say is that ASD is probably equally hard for both men and women.

The only differences I could possibly see are the complicating factors of there being fewer aspie women, and in most cases aspie women are the more vulnerable to sexual exploitation.

Let's just agree that ASD is no cake walk for anybody.

I am in an insulated environment..but I think I have it somewhat easier than a lot of people have it. I have a network of friends and the support of my parents...currently..

It is all entirely subjective....for men and women...There is almost no point in even trying to make the comparison.

I have been taken advantage of sexually..it happened as a child..just because I was a child..and then as a teenager...when I didn't know any better and didn't know how to defend myself...and that might have been because of my AS..

But I am sure NT females can be just as vulnerable...just as AS and NT men and boys can be vulnerable too.

No matter what us gals and you guys will always be screwed because the world is NT. I would love world peace and all the goodness that comes with it, but the NTs have to be more honest and the aspies and all those messed minorities need to compromise just as much. Life will always be a hard road to travel, with many weights upon the aspie shoulders. So...

LETS BUY ALL KINDS OF JUNK WITH OUR BONDS/SAVINGS/INVESTMENTS AND GO RV-ING! YEEHAW! EXPLORE YONDER MOUNTAINS!

Probably both do.

But I do think aspegers isn't as recognized in females as it is in males. For years I went through hell seeing psychologists and psychiatrists without anyone ever mentioning the word aspergers or autism.

Wasn't until my mom learned about it on the internet and she had to be my advocate. So it is harder to get diagnosed amongst females. I also did not live a lucky life in the dating department nor friendships. I find it funny most guys here think women have it lucky when it comes to dating or the social world. Growing up, I was teasted by both sexes and felt like I didn't belong anywhere. Outwardly I was a nerd and the stereotype of most nerds is that they're real into math and paperwork. My biggest interests were music and art....there seems to be a stigma or pressure to fit in a subculture which is just the same as conforming when trying to find like-minded people.

I think it's just as hard for males....at least the drift I get is there's a pressure for them to be more outgoing and the ones that make the first moves in dating. I also notice with NT males, they get together and talk about the usual such as sports and things that would probably be harder for an aspie guy to get into...then again I guess it would be the same with females.

women have asperger's worse than men, because men can pretend to be the strong silent type, and women can't. women get labeled with sexist names like slu*, bitc*, and they get taken advantage of for sex.

While adknowledging the challenges experienced by men, I agree. I've experienced quite a bit of that and aspie women don't have easy lives either.

Aspie boys are more immature and have bigger problems with school and finding a job later. They also only know women as bullies.

they know women as bullies and por* actresses

but wait! also mothers, grandmothers, and sisters, so don't be too harsh on aspie boys!