dumb feeling that fashion will solve everything...

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Isn't having great style subjective?

I could have written that word for word . I'm often perceived as arrogant or snobish based on appearance. It's good for keeping shallow people at bay and those who get to know me a bit better soon find out it's not true.

Sure it is, but you also get a lot of feedback from others, even without asking. Judging from your pictures you have a very personal style too - these things attract attention more often than not

True; people tell me i have 'good style' or 'good fashion sense' but i just wear what i like. >.<

That's exactly what I consider good style - expressing your personality regardless of trends and knowing what looks good on you and suits you. The most common fashion mistake so many women do is to follow trends for the sake of it and wear clothes and make up that do nothing but accentuate all the wrong features.

I completely agree. I wear what I like. I will mix classics with trends as long as they flatter my figure. Sometimes I wonder if what I'm wearing appeals to others - then occasionally I get a compliment from a woman I don't know. I take that as a good sign that I must be doing something right.

I'm currently learning to be a bit more girly. I totally identify with the "turning into a teenager 10 years too late" comment. It is all too easy to think that maybe if I didn't always turn up wearing scruffy jeans and geeky jumpers then maybe more girls would want to talk to me. The moment I try anything different though I just feel so self conscious and obvious. It's like while I'm wrapped in jeans and jumpers I'm safe, but maybe sometimes I do really really want to be that little bit braver.

Gremmie, when I was much younger I went through phases where I would only wear black (because it was supposed to be slimming) or I wouldn't wear skirts b/c I thought my knees were weird looking. As I got older I decided to try new things - like adding color to my wardrobe. I discovered that I liked color and coordinating colors and balancing with neutrals is pretty easy (I didn't want to look like a color wheel) I started looking at it as a fun challenge to go out and try on clothes that I would never consider buying from looking at them on the racks. It was fun and I would find things that I never dreamed would look good on me - but they did. I think it's like mastering any art. Many people think fashion is stupid or pointless or expensive, or take themselves too seriously to act like they care, but I disagree on all fronts. It's a form of self-expression that can be challenging, creative, technical and fun.

I live in Seattle, a city where the norm is outdoor wear and fleece - I dont' consider these fashion and I only wear fleece and thermals around the house. If you've ever seen the tv show "What Not To Wear" that's the world I live in. Taylored jeans, tasteful colorful tops, a fitted blazer and heels (and handbag and accessories). But I wasn't like this when I was younger. I'm 38 yo now (people say I look early thirties) and it has gotten easier with time. I don't worry about what others think so much anymore and I feel good.

I say just start by going out and try on things you wouldn't normally wear. Eventually you'll find something you love so much you'll have to buy it.

You're right about trying things on that I wouldn't normally wear. My boyfriend made his sister (who is knowledgable about such things) take me shopping at New Year, and I ended up buying stuff I wouldn't even have looked at before. The point where I often fail is actually leaving my room dressed up. I've ended up knowing people here for a while, so they all expect me to look a certain way and probably will notice if I look different. One of them commented in surprise one summer when I actually took my jumper off for long enough for him to see that I have arms. I just don't like being the focus of attention very much. It's scary.

I do understand. I hate direct attention. I'm still not sure if I may be agorophobic also. I've learned to deal with it by literally acting like I have blinders on out in public. I don't make eye contact and generally just don't look around because I don't want to catch anyone looking at me. I feel like people stare at me and judge.

At least with strangers I don't have to worry about a ton of comments if I wear something out of the ordinary. My husband and I are self-employed so no co-workers to worry about and I really don't have any friends.

I try to buy trendy clothing to follow fashion, but I don't end up wearing them. I'd like to wear them to work, but I don't want to draw attention to myself....

So I end up wearing the same old stuff to work, which is probably a tired look.