I don't want kids, and i don't like kids?

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Lots of Aspies have kids; lots of NTs don't have kids. I think it is more of a personal preference than an aspie thing.

I don't like or want kids, but woe to you if I see you harming one. *shakes fist* I don't think it's an Aspie thing, though.

Not having a maternal might actually be a good thing in this over-populated world. Also, the stigma that you aren't a real woman unless you have children needs to die in a fire.

I've never wanted children and can't see that changing. There are some kids I like and love dearly. I love being an aunt and my second niece or nephew is due in a few weeks, but being their mother is a completely different thing. I think raising children is just too important and difficult a job to be given to those who are half-hearted about it, or definitely don't want it.

It's good to see that so many people are now questioning the "you grow up, fall in love, get married, have kids, it's what you do" mentality.

My mother loves children, and she can't stand it when babies cry or scream, because the crying is a sign there's something wrong and she empathizes deeply.
I can't stand it when babies cry either, but what I can't stand is that horrible, horrible sound! Of course it's sad if the baby is not happy or well, but all I can think of is how to make that horrible sound stop. I am even considering wringing its neck (which I would never do, of course). My mind goes blank and I can't think straight when children scream.

In general, children are horrid and mean little creatures (and no, I didn't like them either when I was a child myself). But forntunately my nephew is an exception. He is a very sweet and clever kid

I hate that horrible sound, too. I've had four kids-- one of whom screamed for 6 months straight-- and I still hate that sound.

I still like kids. They're by and large cool.

You don't have to like kids. You don't have to have kids.

To not have kids is a completely valid choice, and the best one to make if you don't want kids.

People aren't all alike and should not be pressured to make decisions as if they are.

Besides, I have done enough to perpetuate the neurotype for this entire forum.

You're not a real woman unless... ummm... never mind. I have 4 kids and they still tell me I'm not a real woman.

I don't mind children but I don't want children (and if I really do when I'm older, just two is fine). I suppose having children would mean that I would have to say goodbye to quietness and my favorite things. I'm not ready for that

I don't want kids because:-

-I am afraid to be pregnant (can't explain why)
-I am afraid of vomiting (it is not uncommon to be sick while pregnant, and kids pick up a lot of bugs too when they are small)
-I am scared I might die when giving birth (this has been known to happen with people)
-I am afraid the child might be Autistic or have some other (physical or mental) condition that makes them stand out from the norm
-Kids are LOUD

I don't like children but I love my own.

Thank goodness the youngest is nearly out of his teens!!

They were all accidents.oops
I was a very stupid young person, and birth control pills made me feel so sick. Trusting a male to deal with contraception is a recipe for disaster.

I never would have deliberatly had children. But they became my special interest for years, I even home educated two of them.

A very common sentiment. Don't rule out kids just because you don't like everyone else's; your own are always different.

Never had children, never wanted any. I hate the noises and the constant need for attention. As for the patronizing "one day you'll change your mind" a**holes: I'll be 44 in February, I entered perimenopause about two years ago and my mind has never changed. When my gyn confirmed my suspicion about being in perimenopause I left her office beaming like the sun. Like others do when they learn they're pregnant

I think what might be different and dangerous about having children for young women with Aspergers is that NTs lie a lot about the happiness that children supposedly bring and deny the stress and torture they cause. I am highly sensitive and have severe social issues, but I only learned about my AS at 38. I thank whoever every day I never allowed myself to be pushed into having children. The experience would have killed me (and/or the child). Not having room, space, time for myself and having to endure that horrible noise for years would have been a nightmare. NTs might grow into this more easily and apparently Aspies on the mild side of the spectrum seem to be capable of adapting somehow. But if you're not on the mild side of the spectrum, I don't think that's possible. And unfortunately you can't send children back if you realize: I am not capable of doing this. If young women with Aspergers would ask me, I'd say: Not having children was one of my two best decisions ever.

So don't have kids.

I like kids but don't want them. If I found out tomorrow that I was infertile, I'd celebrate.

I don't want kids for various reasons.

I wish other people would respect my decision, instead of trying to talk me into it.

Not looking forward to the inevitable 'when are you going to have kids' question at Xmas gatherings. It's such a personal thing to ask about , and for some infertile people, a very awkward/upsetting subject.

meh. kids are like gremlins... if you feed them they become monsters.

I feel really connected to what you said. It's so rough being seen as a monster when you're anything but...

Personally, I'm a lesbian and have been with two people in my life -- both women, both neurotypicals, and in both relationships, there was inevitably the conversation about future hopes and dreams...which always seemed to include the topic of children. One of the first things I'd say was that I don't think I'd be able to handle the crying because high-pitched sounds hurt so much to hear (espcially when they're SO loud). Then, they'd of course say: "but babies are so cute..." This is where I'd stare blankly at them and they'd start to see that I didn't feel the same way. To me, the idea of high-pitched screams loud enough to break glass, constant undesirable smells, and being kept awake by both aforementioned things nearly 24 hours a day seems like anything but cute to me. Being somewhat socially-savvy, I'd try not to put it so bluntly, but they'd never be satisfied with my answer. *sigh* Then, I'd be interrogated in what I could only conceive was some strange attempt to assess whether I'm actually human or if I'm really some sort of soul-eating, heartless monster cleverly disguised in an elaborate human suit. In the end, they found my intolerance to the screams of children to be impatient and mean and intolerant, the fact I didn't find them cute to be scary or inhuman and just generally suspicious, and the fact that I didn't really want children to be heartless and unnatural. At the end of the day, they found their own values to be right (presumably because that's how they and the majority feel), mine to be wrong, and they'd make no attempt to see things from my side because I was wrong and didn't deserve that consideration.

When it happens, it feels like you're being treated like a monster. You may even start wondering if you are one -- especially since people have this tendency of saying "everyone feels the way I do and no one feels the way you do" and that makes you feel that much more exposed and insecure. But what it really is is that you're different from them, you feel differently than them, and instead of them respecting your opinions like they expect you to do for them, they're intolerant and hateful to you just because you don't agree with them.

Arguably, everyone pops out of the womb knowing absolutely nothing, only a fraction of what we as a species claim to know is actually verifyable, and so at the end of the day, anyone...anyone claiming they're right and you're wrong in an instance where you caused no harm to anyone...is just an idiot -- and an intolerant one at that. Life choices are largely a matter of opinion and if others expect their choices to be respected (whether they're part of the majority or not), they should respect yours as well.

Something else to consider...

Humans have already overpopulated this planet to such an extent that we've already caused damage to such an extent that certain areas are completely uninhabitable, entire species have gone extinct, our ozone layer has a gigantic hole in it that will not be easy to fix, and none of that damage is really close to slowing down. Not having children helps to reduce the amount of abuse we're giving the only planet we have. Though a couple not having children doesn't begin to make up for the couples that have more than 2 (since we're already overpopulated and 2 only keeps that overpopulation steady but doesn't decrease it), if you don't have your own child, you are contributing to a better future for all the children that already exist (more food and resources to go around). This is another way of looking at things. I'd personally say to someone if they asked: "my not having children allows you to have yours without having our planet and children suffer more for it."

P.S. - On a completely unrelated note, I saw your avatar and though I also enjoy anime, I haven't seen a lot so I don't recognize where your avatar is from (if it is from a series). If you read this, would you mind sharing which series it's from? --For some reason, it seems vaguely familiar. ^-^

I don't want kids, either. Getting pregnant on accident is a big fear. The thought makes me shudder and yet....."I'll change my mind someday."