the treatment of women on wrongplanet

Post Reply New Topic

I wish I hadn't entered this thread. this all makes me so sad.
I always wondered about that too. For instance, when I am watching a tv show and they make a sexist remark, if it were a racist remark instead people would be furious. Now if we women get furious for the sexism we are "man-haters", "crazy", "unstable and exaggerated" etc
this is so damn frustrating!! !

greta christina writes very elloquently about that. her blog is about atheism but many also applies to other movements like lgbt and feminism. many of the things she writes do. no coincidence she is also lesbian.
http://gretachristina.typepad.com/greta ... s-why.html

against feminism most of the arguments are just "shut up that's why". guess what, we won't! we won't endure this anymore.

I can't even begin to understand why someone would deliberately try to hurt or opress others. let alone do things like killing or raping or torturing... when I was younger and naivier I thought people did bad things because they didn't know better, and once explained that what they are doing is sexist/racism/homophobic/harmful/ableist etc etc etc they would feel bad about hurting others as I do. Oh boy how wrong I was!
And now I am trapped in this crazy world full of mean people I can't even begin to understand. I wish people would just accept others, live and let live. why is it so hard to do? I CAN'T understand anything different than that. I CAN'T understand evil.
In my naivety I also thought when I discovered I had apergers that others were like me in this matter. Ding, wrong again! Maybe I should quit autistic forum and join an humanist forum instead.

I'm quite sick of sexism being one of the few tolerated isms. And I wholly support moderators taking a similar stance to sexism that they would to racism or homophobia.

A few years ago in the UK a woman and a man (strangers) got in some heated argument in a supermarket car park. He called her a "Welsh C**T" and got done for racism.

Now as far as I know, being Welsh isn't an offensive term. The Welsh are an ethnicity for sure and perhaps only a 'culture', but not a race. But being called C**T however is offensive and the offensive word was used about her gender. But the guy got done for racism. Madness.

The L&D thread is absolutely RIFE with sexism - and beyond that even, it's rife with vile misogyny. As is, I'm afraid, this thread.

By the way, I don't think making blanket statements about the MRA is sexist. It's a particular movement with a particular ideology. I don't think you can say the same about feminism because it's a much broader church. I am a feminist, but have no problem calling out man-hating Dworkin-style 'feminists' as vile and sexist people. But I agree it's a fine line.

Also hating on fat women is pretty sexist as is hating on short men. Not being attracted to fat women or short men is merely a personal preference. I don't have to be physically attracted to short men if I don't want to and I don't have to feel bad about it. As it happens, I tend to prefer men between 5'6" and 5'10" though I'm currently seeing a man a little shorter than myself (I'm 5'5"). Hottest sex of my life. And I'm a fat woman, too.

The only solution that I see for myself is just to stay away. I suppose internet just brings out the stupid in people, it would be too sad if it truly reflected what people (men) really thought about women, or how people cannot relate to others and are just all about generalizing, judging and exercising their delusions in personal superiority. It's a bit shocking because overall I think discussions in WP do turn out to be quite intelligent and I often learn a great deal, but when these sort of things pop up, and there is just no way arguing/reasoning and it never moves forward. Although there are so many voices of reason, lack of control of A FEW individuals on WP turns it into a never ending nonsense.

The saddest thing is, that being a bit naive as I am, I sometimes try to take what those people are arguing seriously, but the fact is that they won't. That just goes to show that it is a problem, and so any sexist, feminist, and whatever discussions should be really bound to some subforum and strongly moderated out of places like womens discussion and love and dating and others. Because these few individuals always have to say something about women, and always start threads like that and always turn discussion into women bashing. It's tiring, and actually it is a form of BULLYING. As if we didn't have enough of that.

I sent an email to Alex in support of ending the attacks on women. I'm confused as to why this can be a debate. I primarily interact with hfa people and the men don't display the attitudes I see here. It has greatly curtailed my interest in using this site.

I am very happy that a few months ago a very sexist, almost stalkish user got banned from this forum. I feel a lot safer now.

I couldn't have said it better

I want to say that I agree with starvingartist. I define myself as a feminist, just as my boyfriend does. I feel insecure when I read all these posts about men's rights and entitlement. I first joined WP because I wanted to understand my SO a little bit better, but I never found the courage to post something because I started getting scared of the gender war on the love and dating section.

I don't truly identify as a feminist but due to recent circumstances changing my views I wish to do whatever it takes to help the movement in any way possible! It is the least I can do and try to undo my past I just don't want to see more valuable people quitting or see more Roger Elliots popping up.

I just wonder if it's worth browsing to find examples for Alex, when it's blatantly obvious that misogyny is going on - the forum is rife with examples, he doesn't need anyone to put them in a list.

Would it not be more efficient to create a template e-mail that users can copy and paste, and then send to Alex? I'm sure Alex would receive a lot more e-mails then in support of this cause.

I dont think he checks his wp emails.

Also have you read his posts? He would have to warn himself! lol

Do you remember a thing ages ago where his ex posted stuff about him being mean to her? I dont know if it was a troll or real tho.

^ HEY!

You sure he doesn't check his e-mails? Then the alternative is to create a poll and hope most vote in favour.

I don't remember anything about his exes. I hardly know Alex, really.

Send me an e-mail.

I dont know if he checks his mails, he just didnt respond to mine or some friends about banning, I expect he will take notice if people are all talking about the same thing.

regarding his posts maybe he went through a bad patch or someone hacked his account? I dont know, it was years ago, forget I said it.

btw got my john lewis card, when you next come we can go for free coffee and cake!

Maybe banning is more to do with the main moderators. *Shrug*, not sure.

I will text you. I got more vouchers in the post for a free cake and hot drink, but only three of them!

I just ignore the 'misogyny' instead of trying to email Alex. Can't keep myself busy with misogynists all day. Waste of being on wrongplanet.

Inded its an unhealthy habit but then again I wasted to much time myself focusing on misandry so im learning to move on and try to help women out instead of take my frustrations out on the wrong women instead.

yeah, i fought against diagnosis because while i had researched ASD and on paper i identified with a lot of it, in doing "field research" and coming here, combined with the few self identified autists i'd met in real life, it was incredibly alienating. to me, it felt similar to as if many of the posts were arguing that people with ASD should be locked up because of a few examples - that had been told to them by other people, no less. after i was diagnosed anyway, haha, i looked deeper and identified people i could relate to, oh but the noise!

i would like to use the site to get and offer support that i can't in the real world, but the main reason i don't come here often is because it takes way more effort and focus than i have to avoid the stuff that from my point of view is harmful. i end up spending a lot of energy writing a response that feels pretty pointless in the end. (and usually i give up before i post and delete it anyway )

if we are people that largely have focus and processing issues it seems cruel to me to toss incendiary remarks around and expect them to be ignored in the name of free speech. to me it feels like being blind and someone shouting fire or having an unannounced fire drill in the middle of the night. i'm never going to learn a way of fully dealing with that well beyond avoidance, or i wouldn't be diagnosed in the 1st place.

one reason i even attempt to take the time to respond is because the hateful stuff comes off as propaganda to me. when i see so many parroting the same lines i can't help but feel that someone has given up processing the world because it's too much to deal with and instead opted out of dealing with it. life can be overwhelming, it's easy to go there.

hate is a barrier against reality not a lens to view it more accurately. i believe they are coming from a place of deep sadness and turmoil, that makes me feel sad for them and want to help. i know ASD people can do so much better in cutting through all the BS of the world if given the opportunity to process it. we might only be able to use one lens at a time and only sees details a very specific distance from us with that one lens, but when we put in the effort to turn all those different views into a single picture it usually lets us see very accurately. like HDR of the brain i guess. off to look it up online. lol.

i know we can come up with a novel way of doing it better here too.