Appearances

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I am a woman who will be 30 next month and like most of you in here, struggles with appearances. I happen to be a bit hippie chick type who wears very little make-up and dresses mildly like an earthy chick. I also seem to enjoy wearing my hair short and sometimes enjoy shaving it into a buzzcut for cancer charities. However, the problem is that I am trying to work on looking more feminite if it's not extreme girly girl. I am also debating on trying to grow my hair out but the problem is that it's so thick and it bothers me after a while that I get fed up and cut it off. How have some of your tackled looking for feminite without looking too girly girl and having to fight the habbit of growing one's hair out?

I've had long hair all my life. It's kind of the default in Native American communities to have long hair and I think this got passed to me although I'm half white and my Native American parent kind of mainstreamed herself for lack of a better word as a young adult before I was born. Just some things stick culturally especially if the person in question is more conservative tradition-wise which I am. Or really conservative in any sense, cause conserving the status quo re: hair would be to let it grow without chopping it off. and I think it looks good on both genders.

Point being: umm... long hair makes you look more feminine to mainstream society but it isn't inherently more feminine so I think that's a good way to feminize yourself without losing your sense of identity. Of course you brought up the trouble of upkeep of long hair which is a real factor. But. Hmm. I don't know. I don't wear makeup either. If I did I would wearreally obvious stuff like Bjork wears. That's not to feminine, that's just beautiful.

Maybe wear your hair in braids. I used to do that when I was younger. I usually wear mine down, or if it's really hot I'll put it in a pony tail.

I like the braiding idea as that is a feminine idea as I used to love braiding my hair.

Yeah it is a good idea. I was wondering though if anyone else has trouble braiding their own hair and if it's related to Aspieness. I wish I could but I'm so clumsy/not good at knowing where parts of my own body are, especially hair which can't feel anything itself.

Growing my hair out was a pain, but once it got long enough to put into a ponytail, I was fine. It's past my waist now and I wear it in buns or braids. I can't stand it loose for sensory reasons, but I love how different hair styles look. I actually spend less time on my hair now than I did when it was short (though the shortest I've had it was a couple of inches and it still needed styled at that length). I like how a plain bun is undeniably feminine and yet not soft
I can braid my own hair because I had long hair growing up and I braided it every day.

I have thick, wavy hair and have had it both short and long throughout the years. At the moment, it's a reverse bob - just past shoulder length in the front, just past my collar in the back, with a fringe/bangs. I straighten it after I've washed it and then it's very low-maintenance. When I had long hair, I had much more trouble with it: brushing it was torture, it was unruly and frizzy and a nightmare to dry. A short-but-too-short cut can look very feminine and, if suited to your hair type, be very low-maintenance. You could also ask the hair dresser to thin out your hair: less heavy and thick, without taking away from the length.

I struggle with thick hair too. I compromise and wear short hair that isn't too short - in other words, the front part of my hair goes down to a little above my jawline while I can let the back be as short as I want. Kind of like an A-line cut/bob type of thing, but shorter and choppier. This picture I found on Google gives you a good idea of what I'm talking about (at least from the front): link

As for clothing, I mostly wear jeans or khakis with T-shirts. If I need to be somewhat formal (such as attending church or a party) I will wear a long-sleeved blouse or a short-sleeved blouse with a vest over it.

I have a longer pixie and I am in the process of growing that out from a buzz that I did for charity back in March for an organization that raises money for cancer research. I also bought a set of clippers to keep my hair cool for the summer and a lot of people liked the buzz. However, I am happy to be growing me hair back out as I feel good having hair all together.

Re. long hair - there's always the option of an undershave. If you leave your hair down many people won't even notice that half your hair is shaved off. If you put it up you'll definitely look different from normal, but not necessarily any less feminine.

mh.. I wanted to be more feminine some time ago, but the hair.. The worst part seems to be growing from very short to ears length. What comes after that, Im not sure. . I only had it longer twice in my life :s
It's short now. I'm going for androgynous. Lisbeth Salander is way hot .