no meltdowns or stims?

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Do you think it's possible to be on the spectrum and never experience a meltdown, not even in childhood?

I ask because a friend of mine has an adult child with some AS traits, but he never had a meltdown and neither does he have a history of stimming. I guess I look at my son who has meltdowns and some stims and I think her son can't have AS if he never did those things (not even as a young child).

But, maybe some people aren't diagnosed until later in life because those features weren't present. I was just wondering if it could be possible.

Well, those things are not part of the triad of impairment. I think the official main set of problems are;

social communication
social interaction
social imagination.

Everyone stims, even if it's not noticeable.

As for meltdowns, I think it could be possible, however, many people have meltdowns privately.

So I would say he does these things, but it was never known.

I would think it would be hypothetically possible, but highly unlikely. Stims, even less so than meltdowns. They're part of the diagnostic criteria, they're so common. I'd look for things like internal meltdowns - for the longest time, I thought I didn't meltdown, then I realised one day I did, but I shut down, I don't explode, so it's not so visible to others. I'll also isolate myself when I'm having a meltdown, so it's rare that others will even know it's happening - I'm on my own.
For stims, they may be minor things like drumming fingers, tapping your arm or foot, or even visual - tracing things with your eyes. All of those could be stims, and none of them would be easily noticed. I'd expect that someone on the spectrum did stim, it was just barely visible, and that they'd have meltdowns only rarely, and even those would be hard to spot if you thought neither were present.

What do you mean they're so common?

I have never had a "meltdown" in the Autism or AS sense nor do I stim...I was diagnosed by a whole team of psychiatrists at a teaching hospital. But, I was told not to expect to find any real support for my diagnosis because I am at the high end of the spectrum closer to neurotypical ...or what one says is "normalcy."

I think it's possible to learn to hide the things such as stims that aren't socially acceptable. I think that's why it was so difficult to get my son diagnosed. Because he wasn't exhibiting a lot of things unless he was actually extremely stressed or extremely excited. I know they've told me that it's been hard to do a diagnosis for me because I've learned to hide alot of my stims and I tend to lock myself away when having a meltdown.

Stimming takes so many forms, many of which aren't noticeable. They aren't always rocking but can include nail biting, fiddling with pens etc..

If you're suggesting that the child has never lost his temper - I'd say you weren't looking at the whole picture. Even babies lose their temper.... Losing one's temper and having a meltdown are very similar.

I didn't notice the first proper meltdown in my eldest son until he was aged about 7, long after he was diagnosed.

Well, from the DSM-IV criteria:
My bold. Stimming made it into the DSM. It's common. Most aspergians do it in one form or another. If it wasn't something commonly found in Aspergians, it wouldn't be part of the diagnostic criteria.

Shrug. I'm on the upper end also, high enough up that I could be PDD-NOS rather than Asperger's. Doesn't really matter. I meltdown rarely - otherwise it wouldn't have taken me so long to realise I do it at all. It's possible it's something so rare that you've not joined the dots. Ditto stimming - it takes a huge amount of stress for me to stim these days, but it does still happen. Maybe you do, maybe you don't. All I'm saying it's very common, and I would be dubious of someone who didn't do so at all. But many of us hide these things, and some well enough that we don't even realise we do it ourselves. I'd absolutely be dubious that any Aspergians have never stimmed or melted down at all, but it wouldn't surprise me if some didn't realise they do it.

My hands shake a lot, but I think that's carpel tunnel syndrome and not stims...right? I've had it since I was child. When I dragged race, I was told it was "adrenaline" but it would go on for minutes on end, taking over my body as well.

My legs tend to shake as well when I'm under stress. I also bite my lip, can't stop moving around, and I tend to do a "Compas" count-clap. 12-1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11...although I've blamed that on Flamenco. lol.


Would that stimming or something else?



I don't know about meltdowns, although I did have an anxiety attack on New Years Eve and then on New Years.


Excuse me for taking this a bit off-topic.

I'm unsure what's the difference between stimming and tics. Is it the same? I've a whole lot of tics since my early childhood. I guess the difference is that it's not so easy to stop a tic when it has already started while if you want to stim or not is up to you - I mean, I fiddle with my hands and specially fingers, recently for the last several months but I can easy control if I want to do it (for instance when I'm bored) or not. Am I right?

Last edited by Irulan on 07 Jan 2008, 5:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.

tics are more involuntary and can feel like a strong force bursting out,whereas stimming is for self stimulating purposes,even if it's not noticed when it happens.
it can be hard to stop stimming as well,under certain states.

He is a chronic nail biter. Wow, I didn't know that could be a stim. Interesting.

About meltdowns, I didn't know this guy when he was a child. My friend has seen one of my son's meltdowns...which resembles low functioning autism when he has one. She reports that her son was not like that as a child.

That's sad, but true. It seems like the higher functioning individuals get a bum deal when it comes to supports. The differences are discreet and NTs will expect you to be typical in all ways.

Well no mother is going to admit that when it's over... they all say "oh, well my child wasn't like that".

It's funny when you have your second child how you think... No1 child didn't do that.. then someone else says "yes he did... remember when he.... etc,"

You forget the bad.

What exactly makes up a meltdown? Every child has a fit now and then, and even as adults, people might break down and cry when stressed or worried. Is a meltdown something that is more sensory oriented than emotion oriented? I don't think I've ever really had a meltdown. I came close a few times after being overwhelmed sensory-wise if that's what a meltdown is.

My meltdowns (which have always been a big problem for me) are usually more emotion-related, though environmental issues contribute. One aspie trait that tends to contribute to them quite a bit is my need to have things go as planned. Unexpected events and things going "wrong" can often be highly upsetting to me. However, I am just very emotionally hypersensitive and have always been. I am told that this is related to AS, though not all people on the spectrum are like this. I feel like I somehow lack the mechanism that allows most people to get over small and moderate irritations without getting too upset. When bad and unexpected things happen to me, I often just break down. I am trying to work on this.