Do you ever tell someone you're fine when you aren't?

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My issue is I focus on the past and at times this drives me to tears and mom will be like WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU! Me:Nothing I'm fine. Her: NO YOU ARE NOT FINE!! !! !! YOU NEED TO TELL YOUR PSYCHIATRIST YOU GET UPSET LIKE THIS!! !! ! me: No it's fine. So I tend to not let her/family see me when upset but at times I can't help it. Now adays she just storms off. I'm at a crossroad in life I got to into my "special interest" of Psychology to the point of analyzing my family and yet now without College I'm depressed. So it falls onto the Shakespere question To Be or Not To Be? In College Aspie Obsession or no college and depression WOW! A RHYME Obsession or depression LOL!

I just say "Good" in as non-committal a tone as I can. It's what people want to hear before they go on to discuss their problems.

Of course, all the time.

Have I got this right... you're doing some major internal processing of some pretty painful stuff. It shows. Your mom is worried about you, is expressing pretty forcefully, and isn't satisfied with your response, which is at variance with what she can see.

Sooo... maybe a more honest response, along the lines of "I'm just working something out, I can handle it. I appreciate your concern and if it gets to be too much I will tell my psychiatrist. Now I'd like to be alone for a bit."

Of course, she'll probably still flip out, but would something like that be do-able for you? It's both acknowledging her observation and concern while still not getting into it.

It'll be a useful skill for a future friend/relationship.

I do it all the time. Nobody wants to be bothered by bad emotions.

I say "good" all the time, especially to strangers.

My answer is fairly uniformly "Meh"

Luckily, people here are used to it by now. Twas annoying when I had to elaborate with "It's always meh"

Yes I know. Quite a mouthful of an elaboration.

It took me a long time to learn that people weren't serious when asking me how I was. I tended to answer honestly and dive into a rant about everything that was going on in my life. Now that I have learned that asking one 'how are you' is more of disinterested formality, I will oblige them with some stereotypical 1-2 word answer. This makes me feel a bit awkward.

"Fine" seems to be the small talk script, so, yeah, I say that.

Sometimes I say "fine" when I'm not, hoping that maybe it will somehow lead me to become fine.
Who knows...

I tend to respond to 'how are you' with 'not bad'. That seems to be a satisfactory response to those who aren't really interested in the answer. 'Fine' tends to come about with those whom 'not bad' isn't enough, or those who view 'not bad' as the equivalent of 'not good' (I choose 'not bad' because I am usually in a state of apathy, leaning toward neither good nor bad). If they pursue an answer other than my standard, 'fine' is the roadblock word on which I rely. I am not one to share my emotional state, even with those to whom I am close.

Everyday of my life....and i'm sure alot people know i'm lying.


Eh well...in this sickest of all societies...the Gestapo of optimism and the SS of shiny-happiness have me surrounded.


I would face even greater social ostracism than I already do if just went around and said ...."Heyyy glad to hear it!! !....i'm burning in hell myself"! !!

"Fine", "Not bad", "Okay". Always.

Here in Ireland they ask; how are you? And then you say; how are you yourself? They say good/fine/allright and then you say; I'm grant, thanks.

They somehow expect that you give a possitive answer. But I usualy forget the last part and mumble; allright, thanks.

Since I'm never fine*, I just say I'm fine as I don't want to be a dark cloud and/or an emotional burden to people.

*Autism don't let up

Yes, always, up until the last moment.
Because usually I can become fine again by myself so there's no need to make a scene out of it. D:
"Sharing feelings" is usually much less desirable than whatever I'm not-fine about.

Nup, because I am not good at lying and so when someone asks "how are you?" I blurt out an honest response (whatever that may be) before I have time to really think about what I'm saying.