People telling you to snap out of depression, irritating?

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If you've been depressed since early childhood, and it's the only feeling you know - have ever known, just feeling the heat from the sun and the supposed joy which is summer won't make you any less depressed. When suffering from clinical depression - you basicly go trough the trauma, anxiety, stress that most people experience trough a lifetime -just on a daily basis. Depression is all you know - have ever known - it's your lifelong companion and a burden you carry every day. Until the point were you're robbed of any feelings similar to joy - and you'd care as much about losing your leg as not finding a pen. Eventually you realize that it's not supposed to be this way, questions arise and you envy those who seem to be floating trough life enjoying every aspects that life has to offer - yet you lack the motivation and drive to pursue happiness.

You can't just snap out of depression. You have to really want to end it, and see that it's possible despite there being nothing to help you believe this.

I read somewhere that to be happy a person needs three things:


* Something to do.

* Something to look forward to.

* Something to love.


Now that only works if you're already pretty happy, and keeps you from getting depressed. If you're already depressed, you have to make some changes to those 3 things:


* Something to keep yourself occupied, preferably something that gives you a sense of self worth. You have to be satisfied with completing small goals at first, but can move onto bigger ones when you feel up to them. First and foremost what you should be doing is getting yourself better.

* Something to look forward to - This one is the simplest. You look forward to not being depressed. You don't let the fact that it may take time, and that you may have setbacks put you off.

* Something to love. This must, without question be yourself. You can't get over depression by focussing on something or someone else. In order to do this you have to develop a total f*** the world attitude, because you have to believe in yourself above everything else, and never even consider that anyone who is putting down could be right. You may have been told that you're useless, but everyone is good at something, they just need to find out what that is, or time to become good at it. You don't give a damn about what anyone else thinks, because you are only interested in what you do, being good for you. It can be as little as doing the dishes, or anything that is a slight improvement over what you did the day before. You go at a pace you can handle.

You will have to find ways of making yourself better, that work for you. Lots of people will give you advice on what to do to get better, but you should only do things that you feel work, that you can respect, and that respect who you are. Be prepared to try things if you're not sure. You're supposed to be finding out who you really are, not who everyone else says you are, or even who you think you are because of that.


Getting over depression takes time and hard work, but at the end of it you can feel satisfaction in overcoming such a difficult thing. Some people take pride in building a successful business, and supporting their families. When you have overcome depression, and are ready to take the first steps of that kind of task, you will have made no less an achievement.

Tell anyone who just says 'get over it' that you'll get started on that, just as soon as they 'get over' being such an insensitive a**.

You post personal information about your psychological/emotional state on YouTube?

Seriously.

Try dealing with parents that think your "depression" doesn't exist. That the only reason you're depressed is because "you don't have enough Christianity in your life. True people with depression are just demon-possessed. So just snap out of it and stop being lazy." Their religious-conspirator ways.

Depression's confusing enough as it is. Now that they believe in depression, I have to remind them that religion still has very little to do with depression, since I was and I still got it.

But... all in all, I agree, it's almost impossible to just 'snap out of it'.

I think there are two different types of depression.

There is environmental depression and chemical depression.

Anyone can get depression. People can get it from losing their family, losing their mom or dad, losing a child, going through a divorce, losing their job, being dumped by their ex, losing custody of their kids, a child can be depressed because they are being bullied in school, etc. I call that environmental depression. Some people get over it on their own and some people don't so they need counseling.

Chemical depression, people are just depressed for no reason and nothing will ever make them happy no matter how good things are. Only way they can treat it is medication.

I think most people just don't get what depression is or what it truly feels like. This is how I tried to describe it in another forum....

Professionals make those kind of unhelpful remarks too sometimes, when they just don't know what to do with us. I was told by a community psychiatric nurse that she thought I 'just needed to get on with my life'. Well isn't that what we all try to do at first when depression hits? If I had been able to do that, I wouldn't have been referred to see this person in the first place; I would have had no reason and no need to be there. I wasn't at all comfortable talking to this woman and going to see her was unpleasant and a complete waste of time, mine and hers. What she didn't seem to get, and she probably wouldn't have got it no matter what, was that it was my feeling unable to 'get on with my life', feeling totally overwhelmed by the pressures and responsibilities of everyday life and that feeling that I just wasn't coping with any aspect of my life that was a major cause of my depression.

Anyone that tells me I need to change my attitude, quit acting like a sissy, man-up, get out more, I seriously want to smash their face in.

Thank you guys for being honest, it's much appreciated. And no, I don't share personal information on YouTube if you were wondering, I just read some of the comments regarding depression videos, etc.

One person mentioned he believed in chemical depression vs. environmental depression. Very good observation on your part. This is collaterally known as biological vs. social depression and makes up the 'biopsychosocial' model behind depression and other psychiatric differences.

Once again, your comments are much appreciated.

Is this thread a jab at advice I gave in another, or just a coincidence?

I was giving honest advice, not telling him to snap out of it. My later (and in retrospect, unwarranted) post in that thread was a product of frustration and was not related to my actual advice.

I have had pretty serious depression before, and being cooped up without sunlight (even if you don't like to go out) is more harmful than you might think.

Nope, just a coincidence.
I'm sorry that things didn't go well in your previous conversations though.
Many people such as myself become rather irritated when people tell them to 'just be happy' among other more offensive comments regarding depression and other forms of dysphoria.
This is why I wanted to start this topic, because I wanted to see what information other people would provide.

Alright, don't worry about it.

I felt a little bad about how I conducted myself in the other one, I figured that might have triggered it.