WrongPlanet is the only place I can comfortably communicate.

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I've tried other forums and I can't even get people to talk to me. Even Aspergers forums. On some of the special interest forums it seems the same 5 or 10 people talk to each other and no one else.
I'm glad I found this place.

I feel the same way about WP, as well. This is the only community, where I feel free to discuss anything, without being judged.

Those other forums sure are missing out; you express yourself extremely well on here, and I always enjoy reading your insights.

Hey Glider, it's nice to see you back!

I was away for awhile, myself. I recently posted about how I have decided that I'm probably not on the spectrum after all. I had been "not sure" for a while, but I discovered an external cause of a lot of my "possible aspie" symptoms.

I have a few other forums that I go to as well, but this is the only one where I know I can say just about anything about how I see the world, and I'm not going to end up wishing I had said nothing.

I've recently started homeschooling my eldest son, who was having a lot of anxiety in public school (he's AS). I've been going to an online forum for parents who are homeschooling, but it's been kind of frustrating. It's clear that I don't fit in. Most of those people are doing it for religious reasons, and teach "Creation" instead of "Evolution." Well, I like to be honest and open, so I revealed that not only do I want to teach evolution, but I want to make it the backbone of our entire biology curriculum. I didn't say anything negative about anyone else's choice, I simply was honest and open about my own. But ever since then, I've noticed that a LOT of my posts go unanswered.

That would never happen here. If I come to WP and write about my way of seeing the world, I almost always get responses that show that my views are valued and respected. Not that people necessarily have the same views; but that people appreciate what I said. Some people might disagree and share their own views, and that's great.

Anyway, I'm supposed to be off the computer now, so I'd better go. Again, Glider, it's great to have you back.

That's a good point Leejosepho. This is a place where we can typically be candid without the fear of being mocked. That was one thing I got tired of on the roller coaster forum I belonged to---people mocked me and others.

You point out an important trait here at the WP Clyde---the fights here tend to be about the views and beliefs we have without others calling us dumb. Our beliefs and views are respectable and should be seen as such. For the most part, when others don't agree with us, we try to handle it in respectable ways. And as you stated, the disagreements here debate the views rather saying the person is dumb for having that view.

Hi FJP---I have noticed the people not talking to me on other forums too. I may have posted something I felt was "pretty good" and worthwhile, and no one responds. That happened a bit on the dulcimer forums. And the 5 or 10 people conversations you mention seems very clickish---a lot like school. This may be what happened to the roller coaster forum I was with. I think a lot of people like me got frustrated and left since our voices didn't seem to matter. Here at the WP, our voices seem to matter to almost all of the members.

I feel the same way CockneyRebel. This is my only place where I feel I can freely discuss matters that I wouldn't normally discuss without the fear of being judged. There are times of course where people question my beliefs, but it is usually done in a respectful way. I think most of us feel like valued members of this community.

Thank you Pat2rome. I appreciate your enjoying my insights. I always try to be respectful. And I post my honest beliefs and experiences---which is something the WP is---it is honest.

Thank you Elderwanda, it is good to be back. I think many of us benefit from breaks from time to time. That is interesting about the external causes producing many of your Aspie symptoms. Feel free to share about that---if you wish. Even though you have determined you are probably not on the spectrum, you will still benefit here (and you have a family member on the spectrum). I respect your home schooling and beliefs. And you mentioned about posts going unanswered on another forum because of your beliefs---I can say as you know, here at the WP that usually isn't the case.

I find that this forum has a large number of people with a thinking and communication style that I understand. There seem to be very few flame wars, ego trips, baiting, group bullying, personal vendettas and one-track spamming that characterise the internet.

I use a couple of technical, work-related forums regularly and I estimate that about half of my posts are misunderstood, to the point of receiving no useful feedback. Every thread that I have started here has been useful to me (although there have been a couple of times when people have assumed meanings I did not intend).

My typically bad experiences in web forums are having people make the worst possible interpretation of something I write, picking tiny scraps out of context, pwning the thread with something almost completely irrelevant and generally being obnoxious behind their anonymous screen names. The worst experience is when 5 or 10 people suddenly pop up to agree with some obnoxious comment, as if this is what "everyone" believes (when most likely it is 5 or 10 pseudonyms of the same creep). One person hunted down every forum I used for a couple of years, and pasted the same hateful stuff in every thread I started - which must have been a sad existence for that person.

There are obviously arguments and disagreements on Wrong Planet, and the community seems to handle them well - surprisingly few threads are locked or deleted.

I never feel comfortable communicating a lot of the time, even online, because in the past every time I do so I'm always shot down.

I've only been here for a little bit, so I can't say for sure that this is my only haven or anything, but... I don't feel comfortable being honest in most places I go.

Most of the time, I'm okay here. Other times, users will gang up on me. Am I tactless? A little but I don't think I deserve the harassment I've gotten on WP. :/

I feel reasonably comfortable here compared to some places. But somewhat uncomfortable here compared to yet other places. I am really happy though that some people have found a feeling of home and belonging here though. I don't feel that way quite so easily for some reason.

I like the parts about people disagreeing without being judged as harshly (on some topics), and about certain features of autistic communication being respected.

Although it can take only one person to cause feelings of unwelcomeness. Once on here I had a terrible experience in a disagreement. Someone accused me of using political correctness to cause my opinion rather than experience. I said I was working from experience actually and gave details. The person both refused to believe me, and told me to write shorter responses. I felt terrible and spent hours trying to write posts that were both short and contained the information I wanted. I understand reading comprehension problems because I have them myself. But often I cannot even read my own posts for that reason, because I cannot control the length of posts usually. They come out long or short. She kept telling me I could write short if I wanted. I tried and tried through several meltdowns. I asked if anyone could help me shorten my posts, not a demand just in case anyone might be willing and able - like on some forums I go to where if there is comprehension trouble, those with the ability will translate. She told me nobody was going to do that because unlike my home there were no servants here. (Which was a double slap in the face and an eye opener, because the only people who normally accuse me of having servants are people who bully me by claiming I fake autism to get servants like a rich person.) I think at some point when I asked her to be nicer or something she told me I "always play the victim" (another thing the bullies say, to make their bullying seem less so).

Anyway I was shocked because I have a bad habit of thinking all discussions are in good faith. I think the other person is playing fair because I am. I think when they say something about my thoughts or motivations, then just telling them my real thoughts will solve the problem. To realize the other person was just another of the people convinced I'm a "fake autistic" hit me pretty hard and I was afraid to come back much for a while. I also didn't understand why someone would talk to me if they think I am a liar. I don't talk to people I think are liars much because I talk to exchange information. If they are a liar the information will be false so what's the point? After that conversation I was so drained from trying to write like the person seemed to want that I couldn't function. And all to talk to someone who was talking in bad faith. Left a bad taste in my mouth even though itwas just one person, and raised my anxiety about coming back where it had happened.

Oddly enough it is easier for me to handle the parts I don't like about here that are more widespread than one person. Those are that I have found a certain amount of elitism among some people here. Either believing their formof autism is better than the others, or more commonly general prejudice against other kinds of disabled people. I am disabled in other ways than just autism so some of that is personal. Others I am upset on others behalf. Whether it's about physical, cognitive or psychiatric issues. (Actually my argument that went bad here, was someone saying that people with mental illness are dangerous and shouldn't be trusted. This was right after a friend was driven out of the autistic community because she also had psych issues and was facing bigotry and it hurt a lot watching people denigrate an entire kind of people including my friend and many many others I have known and cared about. People with psych labels, like autistic people, are more likely to be victimized than the other way around.

The other reason I'm more comfortable some other places is not intentional on anyone's part and cannot be fixed. It's to do with compatibility issues. Most people here have different sorts of autism than me. That is expected since I seem to be in the minority, at least among autistic people with good expressive language. And I communicate even better than I do here, when it's with people with even more compatible brains, and who are interacting without words. Even for that matter when communicating with words, but with shared understanding of the limitations of words in certain ways. But I would never expect the world to all be like me so I accept that.

So I mostly do okay here but there's a few parts I can find quite difficult.

I think I am being harassed here for my special intrest with having pet meerkats by someone by the name of Delirium on the "Asperger's Mansions" thread. I guess there's a bully everywhere.

now that i have a new computer, i'll be here everyday~ but yus wp is one of my favorite internet hangouts