So who does chatty areas in forums?

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30 May 2011, 7:03 pm

Verdandi wrote:

Moog wrote:

Really? I dunno what to say.

I don't consciously know why I participate in some conversations, and completely overlook others. I should investigate. Recently, I haven't felt inspired to post much at all.

I think on some level it's about interest, but then why do I find chit chat sometimes interesting and you don't? That's the question.

Yeah, interest probably has a lot to do with it. I feel like, and may be misunderstanding, a lot of the random discussion tends to be for the sake of discussion (at least on other forums), and that's not very interesting to me.

Thanks for the somewhat expanded answer.

Zen wrote:

I hate those kinds of threads. :oops:

I'm not sure I properly understood the point given how the discussion evolved. Whatever came of it, I moved on.

I'm not fond either, I really don't see the point. I don't care that they happen because I don't look at them anymore.

People should post that they themselves stand out here on WP. That way everyone gets noticed. I see those topics as WP popularity contests of sorts.

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30 May 2011, 7:12 pm

Maje wrote:

I cant read through the random posts without loosing my concentration. I dont feel that I have anything to do with it; like it is how "other people" communicate together. Hard to explain.

I think this makes sense to me, although I can't be certain without telepathy.

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30 May 2011, 7:18 pm

I will use telepathy instead of posting the answer

Last edited by Maje on 30 May 2011, 7:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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30 May 2011, 7:26 pm

IdahoRose wrote:

I go into the Random Discussion forum a lot because there are lots of threads that give me the opportunity to say what's on my mind. Kind of like Facebook, except I'm able to be more open here since the people of WP aren't connected to my family members. I always have to be careful of what I say around family members, because the content of my thoughts would be offensive or even outright insulting to them and would subsequently cause embarrassment to my parents.

It is so hard for me to get into Facebook, too. Most everyone I've added as friends is based on mutual or overlapping interests, and I think I have at most five people I have met in person on my list...and I met them after I added them. I also have none of my family friended.

If I were to do this kind of thing you describe, I'd be more likely to go to PPR, but since I have politics fatigue, I just avoid it too.

SyphonFilter wrote:

People should post that they themselves stand out here on WP. That way everyone gets noticed. I see those topics as WP popularity contests of sorts.

Yeah, I didn't even think people thought of them as popularity contests until recently.

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30 May 2011, 7:34 pm

I'll jump into a random topic if it catches my attention. Usually I end up disappointed if I didn't get in on the conversation in the first two pages or so. I notice the tendancy for the conversation to take wild turns off topic. If I jump in, say, 6 pages in - it gets ignored anyway because everyone is long past the OP's opening concept.

I'm also struggling with all the fact addicted 'where's your proof' kinda posters. I don't keep big detailed zipdrives full of everything I've ever read. I tend to rely on goggle to be my file system. I have no trouble digging up facts from something I read - when it's applicable and consistent with the conversation. I find that expressing an 'opinion' can be a sketchy thing. I'm of the mind that an opinion, by definition, doesn't require resources or annotated reference libraries. I'm very wary about getting into conversations that will need a research assistant just to participate no matter how interesting it may be.

I have interests - I pretty much express those in another thread I started. If I can't find a thread on something I'd like to discuss, I'll make one. I dunno - I find the adult forum about as comfortable as a birthday party for a coworker at Olive Garden. Luckily, its optional. (no offense adult forum crew... just not my cuppa :wink: )

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30 May 2011, 7:36 pm

draelynn wrote:

I'm also struggling with all the fact addicted 'where's your proof' kinda posters. I don't keep big detailed zipdrives full of everything I've ever read.

I hope I didn't contribute to that, I just wanted to read what you'd read!

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30 May 2011, 7:38 pm

Verdandi wrote:

Yeah, I didn't even think people thought of them as popularity contests until recently.

I don't know if they really are.

I mean, there might be some overlap between popularity and standing out, but I think mostly on an autism site you can take things on face value, and if it's a thread asking about people who stood out, then that's what you're going to get. I don't see that there's much 'political' voting in those things.

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30 May 2011, 7:42 pm

draelynn wrote:

I know I've been in threads like that elsewhere, and I generally went ahead and replied to the earlier posts because I'm impulsive.

Quote:

I'm also struggling with all the fact addicted 'where's your proof' kinda posters. I don't keep big detailed zipdrives full of everything I've ever read. I tend to rely on goggle to be my file system. I have no trouble digging up facts from something I read - when it's applicable and consistent with the conversation. I find that expressing an 'opinion' can be a sketchy thing. I'm of the mind that an opinion, by definition, doesn't require resources or annotated reference libraries. I'm very wary about getting into conversations that will need a research assistant just to participate no matter how interesting it may be.

I'm one of those fact addicted "Where's your proof" kind of posters! :oops:

I don't do it nearly as much as I used to, and I tend to check google first before responding. Sometimes I get frustrated with people making assertions that they can't back up, but of course opinions are opinions. That last took me years to learn, though. Certain kinds of assertions really trigger it for me, though, but they tend to happen in more political discussions.

I don't recall reading anything from you that made me wondered where the heck you were coming from, though. You usually make sense to me and things you say tend to be easily looked up.

Quote:

I have interests - I pretty much express those in another thread I started. If I can't find a thread on something I'd like to discuss, I'll make one. I dunno - I find the adult forum about as comfortable as a birthday party for a coworker at Olive Garden. Luckily, its optional. (no offense adult forum crew... just not my cuppa :wink:

)

One of my worst eating experiences ever was at my niece's birthday party at Olive Garden. I refused to ever go back. Ever.

I relate, though. The adult forum has nothing for me.

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30 May 2011, 7:44 pm

Moog wrote:

draelynn wrote:

I'm also struggling with all the fact addicted 'where's your proof' kinda posters. I don't keep big detailed zipdrives full of everything I've ever read.

I hope I didn't contribute to that, I just wanted to read what you'd read!

No - you didn't! I don't mind a 'hey - share with the class' kind of request. I just get peeved at the 'your opinion means nothing without a study, published paper or blood relation to a nobel prize winner' kind of attitudes. While I find science fascinating, attractive and infinately useful at its best, I also find it to be stagnant, exclusionary and derisive at its worst.

I'm not a fan of the box. I don't think outside of it - I deny it's existence altogether. And I think Schrodinger was just an animal abuser... poor cat...

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30 May 2011, 7:46 pm

Moog wrote:

Verdandi wrote:

Yeah, I didn't even think people thought of them as popularity contests until recently.

I don't know that they really are, either. I know how people reacted to them weeks after (in wrongplanet.net discussion). I think I made my reaction clear there, though.

I took it at face value: Who stands out? So I listed everyone I can remember. But people seemed to be taking it differently, and I just moved on.

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30 May 2011, 8:09 pm

Verdandi wrote:

I'm one of those fact addicted "Where's your proof" kind of posters! :oops:

Like I told Moog - you are one of those - 'Hey, can I see where this is coming from?' types. I can't remember seeing you sit on anyone for facts unless they were wildly - out there. I was sat on a few times for expressing a 'theory' - being told that the defintion of a theory required supporting science - that I was making a hypothesis and when I did so I I needed to make that clear (so they could ignore me.)

Well, last time I checked the synonyms for hypothesis, like words included: supposition, proposition and... theory.

Semantics aside - I googled quick proof, which they also could have easily done, posted it and the conversation stopped. I just do not understand where this attitude comes from? I assume everyone has an opinion based on what they know. I like finding out what other people know. how does that get twisted into some sort of contest about who's head holds the most facts or who's smarter than whom?

I should have said AGGRESSIVE fact addicted...

And, about the popularity contest undercurrent - none of it strikes me as weird. People come here looking for validation they do not and may never get in real life. Other people, who are used to being outcast and overlooked may feel threatened by their perceived popularity... like they can't escape that rat race even here. I get both sides of that and just try to be supportive where I can and hopefully try to spread some good old fashion hippie peace, love and understanding. I'm also trying to be real careful about looking at the age of posters especially when they have a strong opinion on something - well - immature. 'I hate my parents' kind of threads kind of give themselves away.

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30 May 2011, 8:24 pm

draelynn wrote:

And, about the popularity contest undercurrent - none of it strikes me as weird. People come here looking for validation they do not and may never get in real life. Other people, who are used to being outcast and overlooked may feel threatened by their perceived popularity... like they can't escape that rat race even here. I get both sides of that and just try to be supportive where I can and hopefully try to spread some good old fashion hippie peace, love and understanding. I'm also trying to be real careful about looking at the age of posters especially when they have a strong opinion on something - well - immature. 'I hate my parents' kind of threads kind of give themselves away.

There have been times, I think, when I was both socially unpopular and socially popular. The former was mostly in school. The latter happens when I have fans, which I've had for two separate reasons (not huge fans - just internet famous, kind of). I don't really "get" the currents underlying either, although popularity tends to surprise me more than lack of it.

There have been times where I was routinely left out of particular kinds of activities in my social circle, and it frustrated me a lot, because I made an effort to include people when I did things, but it almost seemed like I would be forgotten. I never really thought of it in terms of popularity - more like, I don't know, I had no idea why they were doing it. I can get the frustration with the sense of being left out of things, definitely.

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30 May 2011, 8:41 pm

I can't do that chatty type of internet conversation, I think it is even harder than small talk conversations IRL. I may not be very good at reading non-verbal expressions, but at least it's something. If I say something that is misinterpreted, taken as offensive or just completely incomprehensible, I can look at the other person, see that something went wrong, readjust and try something else. Here that all just takes way too long.

It does not help that I only have one strange writing style and it is not quite right for writing here. Even in general discussion, I tend to stick to question->answer or hypothesis->argument type threads because they are allot more obvious.

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30 May 2011, 8:52 pm

huntedman wrote:

I hear you about taking way too long. I always appreciate people who have patience and don't expect an immediate response when communication goes sour, although people tend to get very impatient.

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30 May 2011, 8:54 pm

Maje wrote:

I will use telepathy instead of posting the answer

I meant I am not positive, but what you said sounds like it makes sense to me. I think I can relate to it.

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30 May 2011, 10:24 pm

Verdandi wrote:

huntedman wrote:

I hear you about taking way too long. I always appreciate people who have patience and don't expect an immediate response when communication goes sour, although people tend to get very impatient.

It's less about being impatient for an immediate response (though they are nice). It takes me so long to realize that communication went sour in a thread, and even when I do notice it, there is so little information as to why.

When you say something way out of line in a real world conversation, you get people staring back at you in a moment of awkward silence. It's a little uncomfortable, but you know there is a problem with something you said recently. The first person to stare at you or the first person others stare at after you, is likely the person that you offended most. What do I know about that person? does any of that relate to the topic of conversation? etc.

You start to gather evidence of what went wrong. It's like having a black box after a plane crash, there is some hope of understanding why things went wrong and how to prevent it in the future.

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