Workplace Disclosure - OMG. Now I've gone and done it.

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I told my manager in person, privately in his office, and that was it. He was cool with it; didn't phase him one bit. Just listened to what I had to say, thanked me for informing him, and we both went back to work like nothing was different. He never thought less of me for it, and neither did the few co-workers I mentioned it to once or twice.

There are ways to tell your supervisor about AS without specifically mentioning the a word. I've done it many times before.

I have been working in a hospital. My line manager was a nurse and sympathetic to health problems. I took along a leaflet on what it was and said that I might have it (shortly before diagnosis) as I was advised by an AS employment adviser. She implemented sending round emails so that any amendments were in a written form.

I ended up going off with stress and now not in that job, but that happened to 2 NT people too and she was a workplace bully and didn't discriminate (she was mean to everyone)! She was a terrible manager but OK on a personal level.
I didn't tell the consultant doctor my overall boss as knew he wouldn't make accommodations. I told the 2 people that worked with me as it was a very small office and I was constantly leaving for appointments and easier to let them know why rather than fighting to hide it.

I kept it from other people and it was on a need to know basis. I told an admin manager when talking about stress as my diagnosis was one reason for having a lot of stress. I also told my agency recently when I went off with stress as it is an explanation that I have had a lot going on (got married too) and have reasons for being stressed it's not that I am being weak. My employment people said I should do this, but previously said not to tell them. I did stall from disclosing and checked with the employment people first when they asked when I was off work.
This disclosure was spread over months I didn't do it all at once.

Just did it for the first time and the managers didnt really understand what aspergers was how it affected me, the just thought i was being uncooperative. Then i gave them an official accommodation letter, then they finally took me seriously. My manager still doesnt get that its a disability and still in part thinks im not trying and im not listening to there instructions. She thinks of what of what is my disability as more of a "problem", which was a bit offensive but I just deal with it. I mean you dont say to someone in a wheel chair about their "problem". You say condition, disability, etc.

I dont really know, but telling them basically saved my ass, or else I would have not passed probation.

EXACTLY. People are sneaky, especially NT managers who are like "alpha NTs" as I call them - very extroverted, very street-smart, manipulative, and all about playing politics. Even if you tell these people about your AS dx, they may put on a facade that they'll accept you and be accommodating, BUT my experience on two occasions (as well as that of other Aspies I've seen in online stories) is that you will be targeted for "errors" that didn't exist, constant criticism, given less work (or more menial work), with the intent of getting you to quit, or set you up to be fired at performance review time. This allows them to navigate through the legal hurdles they'd otherwise face. If you find yourself in this kind of passive-aggressive retaliatory situation, the best thing to do is document, document, document (all dates and times etc., and save any surly emails - send them to your web address!!) and if you can show a pattern that the abuse escalated after your disclosure, HR can put two and two together and will likely take action if they think there is a threat of a lawsuit or fines (obviously, don't use those two last words!)

Exactly! I have had many jobs, with many managers who knew nothing other than how to get along with those higher up, and a big part of that is the group mentality, and included in that is bullying. I also withdraw when things get bad, until I blow up. I have always wished I could calmly stand up for myself like I have seen others do. One company I worked at had a woman who behaved like a 12 year old, making fun of people, talking rough, etc I was one of her targets. Actually, there was a little group who liked to give others a hard time, and one guy in the group finally got nailed because he was doing it to people in other departments and even with employees of the businesses we worked with. He would make fun of people's names, tell dirty jokes, act like he didn't understand what you were telling him etc. He was promoted to supervisor even after all the trouble he got into, and the bully woman was made my trainer. Sure made me wonder if they were trying to run me off. What killed me was hearing stories from some people in other departments who would have fits over any little thing a supervisor would say. One woman went to HR because her manager (a woman) suggested she might want to try to look a little more professional by wearing a little makeup. HR offered to move her to any other department in the building. Meanwhile, dumb old me just kept getting dumped on, to the point of many people feeling it was ok to jump onto me over nothing, call me "heifer" not do my work when I was out sick, when it was policy for us to not get ahead of each other and I always did other people's work on my team, in the same position, when they were out.
Sorry for the long post, feeling a little lost and sorry for myself and going over past failures I guess.......

I know it can be hard when you are constantly misunderstood and bullied at you workplace (or any similar place), I have experienced it too. The best thing I could advise to anyone is to stand up for yourself before it's too late and you find yourself blowing up and things get escalated and the bully makes it look like they are the victim, taking advantage of your "misbehavior".

I wouldn't disclose a diagnosis, though, as it can have rather unpredictable effects. Try just explain individual traits in the right context, like "I can't stand up for myself when I feel offended by XY, I think I lack the verbal dexterity to be able to do so. What would you suggest as a solution?" - to the boss after an episode of bullying.

I told my boss because he asked me why my quality of work had decreased lately. My functioning level had been affected because I was undergoing depression from something else. He told me to go home and come back when I was better. I am not officialy Dxed. I mean I have a few other conditions such as epilespy and ADD. I and my psychological-counsellor suspect I might have AS.

You too, huh? I had a former boss pretend not to understand what I was saying, when it was obvious - basically an exaggerated mockery of my condition. Passive-aggressive behaviour at its finest.

I told her about my dx due to her atrocious behaviour, thinking that I had nothing to lose at that point (turns out I was wrong!) hoping that at least she'd feel ashamed of her conduct, but no, it just got worse. She then tried to get me to confide in her, saying that if she directly told me what is expected of me in a given situational context, then I'd do it w/o manifesting Aspie traits. I didn't trust her, and turns out that she was just feeding me false info (as verified through my documenting and recounting the experience to NT friends & family). Same with the times where she told me that she didn't understand what my message was, but I'd repeat the same thing virtually verbatim to a friend, and they told me it's obvious, she's playing games out of dislike for me. It's sickening what these people do to prey on those perceived as more "vulnerable", it's like elder abuse.

So, in summary, you just hope that the person you're disclosing to will have enough of a conscience not to BS and psychologically abuse you, but it doesn't always turn out that way.

I disclosed my self-diagnosis and my later official diagnosis to one of the partners in the office I work in. Since he and I have good rapport, I figured he'd give me a fair chance. Sadly, his response was to lecture me on how I can improve my social shortcomings, but I could tell that he didn't believe I had any actual problem. That experience has made me more wary of disclosing anything since.

Though I may soon be forced to disclose my diagnosis to my immediate boss. I recently had a rather poor evaluation stemming AS-related problems. So if my boss doesn't see improvement (which is incredibly unlikely to occur), I will probably have another such evaluation sometime soon.

Surprised to see this thread that I started pop back up ...

Anyway, I'll update with how things have gone. My last post on this thread about this disclosure was made on Monday 12th September:

The reason I disclosed was that I was experiencing extreme stress and anxiety about various aspects of the job (which I had been doing for 6 years) and I couldn't cope any more. On the Wednesday following this I had a shut down at work which led to my surrogate boss finding me stuck at my desk and unable to move or speak. She whisked me off to my doctor and I was promptly signed off work. I have been off work since then - struggling with significant depression and anxiety and general difficulty functioning, and trying to get appropriate support in place - my GP and the psych team have been next-to-useless however.

On the work side of things the surrogate boss to whom I disclosed has been absolutely brilliant and 100% supportive throughout all this. My line manager reportedly is also very supportive though I have not had much direct contact with him and he does not know yet about my ASD, just the "stress" noted on my medical certificate. My direct work colleagues, who don't know the reason for my absence, have also been supportive in their emails. The occupational health service have also proved very helpful, and I have also had some email support from the free counselling service provided to staff (as face-to-face counselling is a step too far for me at present, though I hope to graduate to that).

I'm hopeful that I'll finally get back to work in the new year, with appropriate accommodations in place to stop me from getting into such a mess again in future. Before returning I do plan to disclose the underlying reason (ASD) for the stress/depression/anxiety to both my line manager and my direct colleagues - I think that both they and I will benefit from them being aware of the real nature of my difficulties. I have done this job very well for the last 6 years, my performance regularly praised and never questioned - just the pressure of "being normal" all got too much. I can do it even better now I'm more aware of my challenges and once I have appropriate accommodations in place. I look forward to being even more effective in my job.

Glad to hear it worked out!

I was lucky I was diagnosed while laid off from my old job but if I can find another job I will disclose only after they hire me.

When I was diagnosed after getting my present job, I informed my former boss. He had my Psychologist and I fill out formal paperwork so my disability would be documented. then he proceeded to figure out my strengths and increase my duties that played to them. My current boss inherited me and is very pleased with my work. My boss is great and understanding.

Good for you!! It's refreshing to hear those stories. However, I hope he was at least understanding of your need to still interact with others; regrettably, some Aspies (including myself) who disclosed have had situations where the boss tries to segregate them from others, to minimize human contact - I once had a boss who said that I was better off working on technical matters on my own rather than being in a room full of people trying to reconcile their needs on a project. So when you say "he increased [your] duties that played to [your strengths]", I just hope he didn't decrease those that were people-oriented to an absolute minimum.

We Aspies still need human contact, otherwise we don't get better, we could regress.
Unfortunately, corporations are not very humanitarian about this, and would tend to follow the democratic approach of the needs of the many versus the needs of the one.

This probably won't be of any help, unless a positive outcome inspires you to believe it can happen.

I told my boss, but he lives two doors down from me, and has a son whose been classified Autistic (PDD-NOS) by the schools. The thing is, we don't see eye to eye at all about how to handle it. I live two doors down with my three Autistic sons, and he sees the differences in how we handle it in action.

But, we get along just fine. We've become pretty good friends over the last several months, though we've lived this close for six years, and I never spent much time with him before he hired me last April. No problems at all with him knowing, and he even asks sometimes at work whether anything about the way things are done is a problem for me.

Just wish I could get it through his head that I need to put my hands on things to learn them instead of being "shown." We're working on it...