Saturn wrote:
Does anyone else have trouble with this? Does anyone know if it's a particularly aspie thing?
I've had trouble with this since adolescence. I'm prone to feel embarrassed and blush in just about any social situation. I'm not sure why, exactly. Perhaps it's to do with general low self-esteem and a sense of inferiority to others.
I kind of tend to feel ridiculous that there is a social situation going on and that I am part of it.I feel there is an absurdity and a basic crapness about the way humans have organised ourselves and I feel as culpable in that as anyone else, or maybe more so because other people perhaps don't feel this. I just feel embarrassed to be part of something that is so far from ideal.
I feel a bit like people can see through me into my thoughts and so I can't hide anything about myself that I don't want to display socially, and as no one else is displaying the things I am thinking and feeling within, I feel guilty or something for thinking and feeling those things that I feel people can just see. I think Jung wrote about this with regard to the INTP personality type, that is, that INTP's feel a very weak sense of persona and feel that people can see right through them.
I've felt that embarrassment and the fear of embarrassment has held me back in some ways from doing what I want to do, saying what I want to say, behaving in the way that I would like, and so on. Perhaps it's not such a majr issue for me now as it was but it does still commonly arise day-to-day.
Well, let's see how it worked out in my experience: it's an acute self awareness. An awareness of many details in your people surroundings, a general
awareness of many details. So I'll attribute it to a 'sensitivity' to all of the above.
The more involved I am in with being social
and thus making the normal mistakes, allows an ease to transcend you. It looks like an
over sensitivity by way of a predictive power of what can happen and does happen. I'd call it a hyper awareness and thus an awareness of one's social limitations in this context.
Why this over the top threshold might be an indication of Giftedness. I've seen this embarrassment posted up on an Introvert board, INTJ, but this behavior isn't endemic to introversion-- it isn't universal.
My guess.
12 Mar 2012, 6:40 pm
