The term disability vs. issues, differences, special needs

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It is fine for others to focus on the literal definitions of words and terms, whatever they like. I suck at thinking that way, so I'm going to focus on other things, like what is going on in the real world around me.

In the real world of the grade school, the junior high, or the high school in my area, autistic kids are not getting a decent education, simply because they are autistic and considered to have an overgeneralized disability that prevents them from learning anything. It is not like their strengths and weaknesses are being taken into account, and a special education plan is being created for each of them, so they need to be acknowledged as disabled to get access to these magic mushroom disability accommodations. There are no magic mushrooms. Intsead, they were diagnosed with autism, so they are automatically considered to be deficient in intellectual funcitoning 4evar and evar and evar, so they are considered to be incapable of learning, unless they can show themselves to be high-functioning, verbal, IQ-average, and capable of being mainstreamed. If you are not all of these, then you are farked in the school system here. If you suck at taking IQ tests or standardized tests, then you get a nice shiny MR label to go with your autism on your school records, and you are really farking farked in that case.

Why are you not mainstreamed? Oh yes, that must be because you are too intellectually disabled and therefore incapable of learning. If you can't learn from spoken lessons, then you are farked. You are assumed to not be able to learn at all. If you get frustrated due to your lack of communication skills or one of your rigidity issues, then you are farked. You are not classroom-ready due to your horrible behaviors. Oh look at the autistic kid acting out like a little monkey, let's all stand around and stare. I am not talking about kids with profound autism and/or severe mental retardation. I am talking about a regular autistic kid, not an outlier. Some of the kids who are verbal and high-functioning but still not mainstreamed also end up learning nothing in the special education classroom. The teachers and students sit around all day watching YouTube videos. One Aspie kid who did a computer project on his own showed it to his teachers and was still not acknowledged as being capable, just because he is there, disabled and incapable in the special education classroom. Oh break me off a piece of that kit kat bar, you couldn't possibly have done that, you have Asperger's, and you can't do stuff like that, don't you know that?

I will also add that, while I am considered by the Canadian and provincial governments to be DISABLED (thus, making me eligible for disability bursaries and other services when I am in school---things I would not be eligible for if I was simply "different"), and while I am considered DISABLED by the university I attend, I am in NO WAY thought of as incapable. Why? Because these people have been EDUCATED as to what a disability actually means. In fact, they encourage me to step beyond what I even think I am capable of (and they are often right!)

Links are lost (collected them when ASDs were a passing interest), but you can trust my memory regarding facts:

The highest rate of employment from all studies I've read has been 47% (US, and from a textbook that consolidates most of the studies), though most tend to be in family business or working way below their level of intelligence. This was amongst the highest of functioning with AS. Most point to less than 20% for adults with AS and other milder types of Autism. The 47% figure isn't too bad (though compare that to the normal population where it's probably higher than 90%), but as I said, it was focusing on the mildest cases, so it's not entirely accurate insofar as all of those with AS

People with AS tend to live at home with parents ("most of"), people with HFA tend to be at home or in group facilities (I think this is due to early severity and parents putting them there from the beginning due to not being able to handle them, but I'm just guessing here)

Most have few or no friends. AS tends to be about 6% in regards to marriage (textbook); this might be higher now as I recall the text was speaking of some of the first people diagnosed when the DSM-IV-TR was new (it probably shouldn't deviate too much though, as that'd point to the label broadening in comparison to its original intent). Apparently, it's a lot easier to make babies than to get married for people with ASDs (ha), but then, all people with an ASD (including subclinical) and even other mental disorders (ADHD), can possibly pass it on in the more severe forms

It's fairly disabling when you look at it objectively. You need to be clinically impaired in one of those areas above to meet the DSM-IV-TR too (the social one will be a given, and it's probably the main one kids will meet; the occupational and self-sufficiency ones are for the adults).

I didn't think "disability" have anything to do with me back in school. Even though I lead a rather anxious and disorganized life, I've always maintained straight A grades. However life after school became rather difficult. As the years go by I feel more and more different from other people my age. Increased responsibilities is the top reason for my struggles. Not to mention my stress load right now is high for even NT people.

If an aspie kid is struggling in school, real life is gonna be even harder. It doesn't get easier as you age. You might LOOK less autistic due to experience and adaptations, but inside you're still different, and living with NTs are exhausting. I don't think I have accepted it as a "disability" until the last year or two. At least I don't beat up myself for things I just can't seem to manage any more.

Having a job and your own place is great for aspies, as well as finding the right person to marry. Having children is usually not that great for aspies, though. It tend to bring out the worst problems you never know you had. I stopped having meltdowns back when I was 8, and rarely have shutdowns as I'm an articulate person. Recently I keep not wanting to see people or talk to people because of my stress level. Finally I unplugged our phone and feel a bit relieved.

Anyway my point is autism is lifelong and should be considered a disability. It hardly ever get better, usually get much more difficult as you age. I'm not looking forward to my parents in nursing home and I need to be the power of attorney for everybody.

I have a purrrty typical set of autism-related impairments, but I don't feel like I am disabled, that I can't do certain things at all. I feel like I can do purrrty much what I wanna do, but I have to find my own way of doing things. Typical ways don't work for me. It's hard to figure out how to work around sensory issues, communication differences, thinking differences, me being rigid and perfectionist. The social stuff, I don't care about, fortunately.

That's been the pattern of my life, finding my own ways of doing things. Someone told me recently that I usually got what I needed in terms of educational help as a kid, because I always followed my way and never conformed to anyone else's way, and that was why my parents and teachers all had to give in to me, just because they couldn't get through to me due to me being too autistic, too rigid to accept anyone else's perspective or even to know what they wanted me to do and why.

I also don't mind the term high-functioning for myself. I have always felt high-functioning on the inside. I have always felt capable. I didn't feel that there was a problem when I had major communication impairments as a kid. The impairments were irrelevant to me, as I had nothing to communicate anyway, and the idear of communicating almost never occurred to me. But I was not seen as unable to learn language for communication, so I got the chance to learn it (be taught it). Not eberry autistic child is so lucky. Some are not taught language in the way that they need to learn it. They are forced to conform to someone else's way of trying to listen and speak, when they would do bester starting from reading and writing. So no wonder they can't learn that way and are considered incapable.

IMO, different folks are higher functioning at different times, and lower functioning at others. I am ambivalent about those terms? But maybe terms like, people who are more profoundly autistic, and less profoundly autistic.