yellowtamarin wrote:
There are plenty of things that I could say are autism-related but I really don't know for sure. Do you think it's okay to explain these things in that way, or is it another step closer to "giving excuses" and "using my diagnosis to get away with things"? Should I just put these things down to personal quirks, and try to get through them alone, or share them as quirks, or share them as aspie traits?
I'm still trying to figure this one out myself. So far I've erred on the side of not mentioning AS to most people. Not that it's a "secret" as such - I just don't think it would do any good. Partly because they wouldn't understand the implications of it anyway and partly because, as you say, it's hard to even be sure for yourself what's AS-related and what isn't. I'm really conscious of using AS as an excuse as well (including to myself).
Having said that, I think giving something a name tends to legitimize it in people's minds. So I can totally imagine that in some cases they might dismiss you saying "look, this is hard for me, it just is" but pay attention to "I have a neurological disorder called Asperger's Syndrome, which makes this hard for me". I guess could say that as a last resort, but I haven't tried it so far. If someone already knows you have AS that probably makes it easier to bring it up. Even if you're not sure whether something is related to AS, NTs are unlikely to challenge you on it, because they'd assume (correctly) that you know more about it than they do.
yellowtamarin wrote:
1. When people hear that I studied psychology, they sometimes ask me something about a theorist or concept, keen to get my views or pass on what I have learned. Most of the time, I have next to nothing to provide them with. While I found studying psychology to be fascinating, and really enjoyed "learning" at the time, the information just doesn't seem to be available to me at a later date. I feel I may have a real issue with memory "recall" (in other words, I am good with recognition, but cannot call up information without a lot of prompting). I've not really heard other aspies discussing this issue; more likely they suffer from short-term memory problems. So I struggle to explain to people why I really don't "know much" about a subject I studied for four years.
Yes, I'm a bit like this too. I'll generally remember things if I consciously try to commit to memory when I learn them, but by default I'll just process the information, store some kind of conclusions from it (that are too vague to articulate on demand) and forget the original information. For example, since I work in IT, I've had this conversation more than once:
Them: Should I upgrade to the latest version of [Windows/whatever]?
Me: Yes, it's great!
Them: OK, so what are the new features that make it so great?
Me: Errr... hmm... can't really think of any just now... but yeah, it's good, you should upgrade!
Them: You'd never make it as a salesman.
What happened is that I read about the new version, drew some conclusions from it and remembered the conclusions, but can't easily recall the original information unless prompted. I think sometimes I'm perceived a being a bit evasive because of this - people ask a seemingly simple question and I can't give a clear answer. I don't know if this is an aspie trait, but judging by this thread, you're certainly not alone.
10 Jan 2013, 9:12 am
