how did you come to terms with it?

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I too was diagnosed as an adult.

Same person then as before.

Nothing different.

I merely found a label that fitted. There was nothing to need to come to terms with.

I spent most of my life thinking that I was entirely unique, because I was aware of so many ways in which I was so significantly different than everyone else.

When I read the descriptions of AS, it was like someone was specifically describing many of my unusual characteristics(and some which I hadn't realized were unusual). I already had a concept to describe the combination of those characteristics. The concept was "me".

The concept of having to "come to terms with" AS seems bizarre to me. It gave me hope. I knew that I was different, and I knew that other people knew that I was different, but I couldn't understand exactly how they perceived me. When I was in school, people said that I was crazy, and so many people bullied me. But learning about the diagnostic criteria gave me clues as to the way other people saw my behavior as different.

I didn't have significant social aspirations, but I did want to find some way to not be reliant on others financially. I started looking up how to get a job. I memorized so much about how to convince others that I would be able to do a job. I learned how to do well in interviews. I memorized questions and memorized so much about body language, even things like not crossing legs, holding my hand with my palm facing slightly up when shaking hands, et cetera.

I got a job. And knowing about AS has helped me maintain it.

Finding out AS was not something I had to come to terms with. It has helped me so so much.

I still deny it for the most part and will until I get rejection papers for all five branches of the U.S armed forces.

I haven't quite come to terms with it, although I am more able to be mature about it and sit and talk about it to people like my mum or other close relatives, or a counselor or anyone like that. But I have not accepted it. I am still ashamed of having this label, and I am not happy with being defined as odd or whatever, and I do hate having AS and often get really fed up.

I nearly come to terms with it when I thought a person connected to my special interest was on the spectrum. Now that I have figured out she is doubtfully on the spectrum, it made me go into severe depression for a few days last month. It would feel nice to know that somebody to do with my special interest suffers with similar things as me, and because it is known for Aspies to look upon people in their obsession as somebody they admire and want to be like, I thought it would really help me. But no, I have my doubts that she is on the spectrum. She is very popular, everybody likes her (from what I've seen), she's a good communicator, and she went on holiday with her friend and met a man out there unexpectedly, who adores her now. I'm sure being popular and liked by everyone, and going on holiday with a friend and meeting a boyfriend out there is quite difficult for an Aspie to achieve, so I highly doubt she is on the spectrum. I know she's prone to getting stressed and gets in moods with people....but then I found out she's Aries.

So no, I haven't quite come to terms with having AS yet. Maybe when I reach my 30s, have settled down a bit, and know that I'm not in my 20s any more. I feel that I'm still young and should be doing things what my peers are typically doing, like going out clubbing and all of that s**t, but when I get to an age where some NTs have become fed up with or passed big parties on a regular basis, I might come to terms with things a little more then, but I don't know. We'll just have to wait and see....that is, if I manage to get past 30, if I continue to have self-control keeping me from committing suicide.

Initially, it was a relief to have an explanation for my social difficulties and way of being. As I learned more, I discovered there was a male stereotype, that I did not quite conform to, since I am a female. This made me wonder if I was misdiagnosed. After doing some extensive reading and meeting others with AS, I discovered there is no such thing as an AS stereotype; knowing this helped me "come to terms" with it.

The diagnosis has helped with self understanding and acceptance. Now, I can openly discuss my problems and work on improving myself so I can get my degree.

I was diagnosed relatively recently in my 60s. Although it brought a sense of relief and closure, I am not able to tell anyone about it at this stage and do not know if I ever will. I do not know how to come to terms with it although I am glad I know why I am like I am.

My story is much like yours, I was Dxed at 10 or 11, accpeted it in the last few years as it became quite clear to myself I had it and can account for almost everything that did not go near as planned in my childhood life(and some things that went even better aswell). When I was told I was AS and therefore a mild autistic I compaired mysel to the 2 LFA people I knew and could not see the simlarities, I could talk after all. It was bad news at the time for my now failing bid to fit in and be accpeted like everyone else at school. I was blind to my own autistic traits and how noticeable they are for so long although I knew I was different somehow from age 3. I would hush anyone who talked about me and my diagnoses, i did not want pity mainly, I wanted to earn everything includeing friends and respect the normal way and I did want people to think I was werid, crazy or broken either. So it was about a 10 year journey to accpetance of having AS.

I can't say anymore I've come to terms with this disease.

It robbed me of every interpersonal relationship I ever had and destroyed my soul.

The moment I was told I have it. I was always fine with having it, I don't see why I shouldn't be. It was an answer to my problems, and I don't care about being labelled in such a way by professionals.

t didn't take much. I was like "AHA!" That explains it and moved on . . .

I was that way too. I wouldn't take accommodations at school and didn't want to be special ed for a long time because of what I bolded in your quote.

At first I was unwilling to come to terms with my disability, but as time in college and therapy grows I started to adjust to my ASD and understand I'm not the only one with a problem, there are other autistic people with the same shortcomings as I have.