auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,221
Location: the island of defective toy santas
06 Aug 2014, 12:34 pm
I don't know what it is about online forums that seems to bring out the beast in some folks. 
so much energy devoted to one-upmanship and "winning" [and tearing others down in the process].
06 Aug 2014, 12:38 pm
AmethystRose wrote:
League_Girl wrote:
I think the OP was referring to the thread about being misdiagnosed with Asperger's so it sparked this discussion. The OP claimed about there being hostile and rude responses and attacks and insults, (can't be bothered to look right now to see what exactly the OP said) and I only saw one person claim he OP was catfishing because of their contradictory responses. But I didn't see any other replies being bad but one. I am not sure anymore what the user wanted to hear and they didn't understand what I was saying so I gave up not knowing how else to put it. Ironic because people have done it to me too so many times and couldn't be bothered to try and explain it or rephrase it so I would understand so they always went "never mind" and my therapist told me in high school lot of people just don't have the patience for it so they don't even try.
Sometimes people will say a post was bad when really it wasn't. People misinterpret or take things too personally or don't like the answer or advice so they will feel attacked. Sometimes it's just a misunderstanding and they may not know that.
Sometimes people will say a post was bad when really it wasn't. People misinterpret or take things too personally or don't like the answer or advice so they will feel attacked. Sometimes it's just a misunderstanding and they may not know that.
I actually didn't claim that in those comments, but that is accurately the last thread that I read and commented on before posting this thread and going to bed.
My exact comment was: "Hey guys. I just wanted to say that it really doesn't matter if the OP is catfishing or not; this is still a good thread. P.S. I wasn't familiar with the term "catfishing." Thanks for teaching me a new word!
" I posted a response to that thread, if you're interested in reading it.
I re read my post and my bad. I meant the OP in the other thread. I didn't mean you.
06 Aug 2014, 12:41 pm
BirdInFlight wrote:
Never you, kraftie!! 
No. I'm referring to someone I ran into whose post was on the Love & Dating section. Quite some time ago someone had posted a topic in which I gave my opinion, and then was attacked for it (I and others who felt the same way I did, it wasn't just me) by a particular person who twisted every word some of us said on that thread, completely misinterpreting and slamming us for the viewpoint he was basically making up in his head. We were some women giving our experiences and our viewpoint -- this guy was a man trying to tell us what to think and belittling us for even feeling the way we felt. But worst, is, like I say, he put words in our mouth that were not even implied let alone said.
The whole thing reared up again recently. He posted a topic that started out seeming joyous and innocent -- so there was I reading it, having forgotten who this guy was because the other thread was so long ago.
Suddenly his new post contains a dredging up of the old thread, and a complete twisting of words again, of those of us who had posted there. Then I was like --- ooookayyy, it's THAT guy....And I couldn't believe he was still bringing that up. I had exited from that older thread early as he was completely out of line and I told him so.
This new one, I made my point and called him out on his BS.
So, while what the OP is saying is a nice sentiment and full of peace, etc, I have to say, nope, if someone is crapping all over me I'm going to crap right back as they deserve to be called out on their BS. I tend not to get into an endless "back and forth" because it's not worth the time, but I will say my piece, hence I basically disagree with the OP here.
She or he should tell THAT guy this stuff.
.
No. I'm referring to someone I ran into whose post was on the Love & Dating section. Quite some time ago someone had posted a topic in which I gave my opinion, and then was attacked for it (I and others who felt the same way I did, it wasn't just me) by a particular person who twisted every word some of us said on that thread, completely misinterpreting and slamming us for the viewpoint he was basically making up in his head. We were some women giving our experiences and our viewpoint -- this guy was a man trying to tell us what to think and belittling us for even feeling the way we felt. But worst, is, like I say, he put words in our mouth that were not even implied let alone said.
The whole thing reared up again recently. He posted a topic that started out seeming joyous and innocent -- so there was I reading it, having forgotten who this guy was because the other thread was so long ago.
Suddenly his new post contains a dredging up of the old thread, and a complete twisting of words again, of those of us who had posted there. Then I was like --- ooookayyy, it's THAT guy....And I couldn't believe he was still bringing that up. I had exited from that older thread early as he was completely out of line and I told him so.
This new one, I made my point and called him out on his BS.
So, while what the OP is saying is a nice sentiment and full of peace, etc, I have to say, nope, if someone is crapping all over me I'm going to crap right back as they deserve to be called out on their BS. I tend not to get into an endless "back and forth" because it's not worth the time, but I will say my piece, hence I basically disagree with the OP here.
She or he should tell THAT guy this stuff.
.
I that guy, and folks like him, are part of the potential audience to this topic; I hope some of them read it.
But look, here's the thing: while I absolutely agree with you that if someone is accusing you of anything or twisting your words, you have a right to defend yourself and untwist those words, I also can't stress enough that this can be done in a non-hostile and non-insulting way.
06 Aug 2014, 12:46 pm
League_Girl wrote:
. . .
I re read my post and my bad. I meant the OP in the other thread. I didn't mean you.
I re read my post and my bad. I meant the OP in the other thread. I didn't mean you.
NP. Forums are confusing sometimes lol
Actually, I miss-remembered what I had written in that thread as well; you'll see that in my response to that other thread, which I posted before reading replies to this topic and going back to see exactly what I'd written to quote myself. I thought I had reacted more than I did, but now I remember: I removed the over-reaction from my comment in that thread and posted it as a new thread... LoL!
06 Aug 2014, 12:54 pm
06 Aug 2014, 2:24 pm
