What to do when you're having a meltdown?

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I tend to have meltdowns (or shutdowns) every 2-3 months but fortunately I learned to control them to a degree. I am able to recognize an upcoming meltdown and change it into shutdown or escape the trigger before it gets really bad. Actually the only situation that is able to get me into full blown meltdwn is an argument with my dad - he is yelling loudly then and I have nowhere to go, locking myself in my room doesn't help since I still can hear him.

Anyway.
This is how my meltdowns look like:
I feel urge to jump, scream, hit stuffs, stamp and cry but I rarely do. Usually I am able to control myself and I hide in a place where I can be alone and embrace my knees, then I rock and sometimes cry - but only if noone can hear me. At times I lie back on carpet instead of rocking.

Alternatively I get into save mode (shutdown):
I don't evacuate from the trigger then but I just take it off from my brain - together with everything else. I might get silent and answer questions using monosyllables ("Yes", "No", "I don't know") or repeatably say what bothers me "I don't get it! I don't get it at all! It's stupid! It's illogical! It's pointless!". But there is nothing what other people might say to help me. The conversation is one sided - I "communicate" but I don't listen. In fact I can barely remember what was happening when I was like this, it is a blank page. My brain doesn't record much when I am in this mode.

Sometimes I am also able to recognize a meltdown/shutdown coming and distract me with something else before I lose control. But it is hard and usually doesn't work.

I have severe meltdowns 2-3 times a week. I'm trying to ask for my medications to be optimised but I get fobbed off with mindfulness, which is only good for mild anxiety, not full-blown meltdowns.

I tear at my skin, kick things, slam my fists down onto tables repeatedly, scream really loud, pull at my hair, slap myself and sometimes throw things.

I had to come off a certain medication that was supposed to stop my periods (it didn't) as it made me have such bad daily meltdowns that the neighbours nearly called the police on me, and when I came off it, I lapsed into a semi-stuporous state for a while, due to the extreme exhaustion meltdowns caused.