A question about Aspergers thread aimed at all autistics

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I think most of my emotional development was halted at around 10 years old.

I doubt that anything could ever change this.

I can only speak for myself, and have undiagnosed Aspergers, which I think of just as a term of a type of ASD. I can't really say its a separate condition.

Anyway, that is not the case with me. I have overly emotional responses (which I can suppress or hide) but do not see any truly childlike nature in myself.

As a former teacher I can tell you that neither learning speed nor difficulty with math or reading comprehension necessarily indicates a low IQ. You may simply have a different learning style.

@sharkattack: I've been told that I am very rational and that I lack emotion. I don't feel that my emotional development was/is stunted as much as the ability to express my emotions is.

My emotional maturity took a long time, mostly learned behaviour I think. At 57, I still have the odd moment where I do or say something considered to be immature - very different to being 'young at heart,' which I think I am as well. Only my body tells me my real age.

Oddly, my EQ is 75%, which is above average. I think it's a combination of learning and a side-dish of empathy, which is something I also had to learn. It took me years to learn to 'be present,' and that opened the door to empathy. Much of the time I'm still guarded though, because empathy is such a confusing thing to experience.

For some reason I'm reminded of Sheldon's rules for empathy, starting with offering a hot beverage.

What is considered emotionally mature or immature?

Apart from my own subjective ideas, I can only go by the reactions I get from people.

Mature: Don't make fart jokes at a meeting with the Chief Executive Officer.
Immature: Fart loudly in the office, then giggle.

Apologies... stereotypical response

I think I'm reasonably emotionally mature, but I've always had a temper and get my feelings hurt rather easily. I was never bullied or harassed as a child (well, there were a couple of incidents as a teenage girl, so I can't say "never" -- I suspect all girls go through a bit of harassment from boys), and wasn't really isolated-- I live(d) in a small town and had a lot of first cousins my age, my mother's sisters' kids, and they wouldn't have dared hassle or ignore me.

At least as a kid, I did test with a very high IQ. I've never been able to tell what good it did me, though. I dropped out of college (I think that it was the times: remember "Tune in, turn on, drop out"?) I've always had jobs, but not very _good_ jobs, and a lot of different ones during my working life, but was only fired once. I once worked with a young man whose IQ was 67. I'd never have guessed, except that he couldn't pass the test for his driver's license, but that could always be a lot of things other than IQ.

Higher than average IQ was never in the criteria for Aspergers. It was average or above IQ.

There was PDDNOS, Autism, Asperger's. [Then Rett's and CDD]

Also, if one were to look at specific studies assessing manifestation of symptoms in HFA [which is not actually a specific diagnosis in the DSM] vs Asperger's, there is a difference. Only this didn't become very clear until DSM IV and DSM IV TR. Then in the DSM 5 it was put on a spectrum. They are all pervasive developmental disorders, but those with Asperger's [what used to be termed Asperger's] experience different symptoms and challenges than do those with HFA than do those with LFA than do those with PDDNOS, when DX'd with the same criteria using the same methods.


By what you just said, you would have been diagnosed HFA. I have a high IQ and speech delay- my dx is HFA. TaDA!

[ETA: bold added for clarity]

I was diagnosed with having a low IQ. Kind of like what Forrest Gump has if you've ever seen that movie. There's a lot of things I can and can't do. I can't name everything though, but I do have a lot of difficulty with many things.

Something we've run into in our family is that a higher IQ *and* early/advanced lingual ability can provide the false appearance of being neurotypical, even to therapists if they aren't aware of what to look for. In fact it's just a whole crushing mass of ever-growing adaptive rules created on the fly to avoid scorn & disapproval. Kinda self-defeating at times, if you think about it.

I don't believe I have any issues with emotional maturity or understanding. In fact I think since my late teens I've sympathized with people older than me.