Others upset by special interest

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I have quite a few special interests, most of them are the normal types. Still it's hard to find people who would really listen and relate. Some people would have virtually no common interest with you at all. Like my mom, when she tries to please me she would listen to me talk about science, I'm especially passionate about geology, genetics, physics, astronomy, biology and archeology. She can't do it for more than 10 minutes, though. Her eyes start to haze over and she gets sleepy. Of course I'm not too interested in what she has to say either, like talking about other people, TV shows, shopping, superstitions and astrology, complaints about other people. I do listen for a while, then try to change topic. Well bred people can probably tolerate up to 25 minutes of you talking about things they don't care about, but it's very hard to pretend to stay interested after that amount of the time. I'm sure other aspies would feel the same if they don't share your interests, not just NT people.

Sometimes I think if anyone has any interest at all, even very ordinary ones like cooking, shopping, knitting or reading books, they're gonna face a lot of disinterest and even rejection from some people if they talk about them to everyone. The correct social response is to talk about an interest for no more than 5 minutes, any interest, special or non special, then stop. Unless you're actively encouraged by their responses, like "How does that work? Tell me more about it." It's rude to keep talking if people don't want to hear about it, no matter the topic. I know we aspies are particularly handicapped in recognize people's feelings when communicating, but we can learn, and be on the cautious side.

There are good books on Aspergers regarding how to reassess, and find constructive outlets for 'special interests.'

My special interest has actually led to my current career. Actually, now I think that may be this cause of some of my problems. At work, I will talk about the work we do with the enthusiasm of someone who does it for a hobby. People seem to get upset, and maybe it is because they don't think about it that way. Maybe they are only doing that work as a means to an end, and they think it is a chore. And maybe when I talk about doing it because I enjoy it and doing extra on my own time, they think I am bragging or showing off?

Does this sound reasonable?

Ohh... and, when I am around my family, when people are talking about their interests, I bring up my work, because it is my biggest interest (it was before it was my work). Then, people don't like talking about work, or maybe it is a sensitive subject.

But also, work has all of this social stuff tied to it. In many circles, people seem to pull out their career as a tool for gaining status or impressing people. So, something I see as a hobby and passion, other people might see as a status tool? If they do see it this way, I can see why they might be upset with me.

Does this sound reasonable?

If so, this is so wrong! I don't want my passion to be trivialized. It is meaningful to me just for what it is!... Okay, done complaining about what I can't change.

I knew that I shouldn't have talked about my special interests all the time, but it was very hard not to do. After many scoldings, I started keeping my interests to myself and start making drawings of them instead. I had to get them out somehow and I figured that I should be fine as long as I enjoyed my special interests quietly.