Your Preferred Method of Communication

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I think I like In Person communication. I dislike talking on the phone & I have problems with typing due to dyslexia & bad fine motor-skills.

For the most part I don't have a hard time talking to people I know or have something in common with. What I have a hard time with is the "give and take" of conversation, so I get yelled at a lot for "interrupting" and "talking over" other people.

I do get asked "Why are you talking so LOUD?" a lot or "Why are you yelling?" And after many years of this I now am somewhat better at regulating my volume.

I do have a hard time with phones. If I'm not calling a close friend or family member I have to write a script. If I can get someone else to make the call for me I absolutely will. Typically my mother will call places for me like the eye doctor, dentist, etc. And occasionally talking to strangers in person will get difficult, and I will need notes to tell me what I was going to say. Usually talking to people in public places (like store employees, etc) is when I start to feel overwhelmed and forget my words. I took a blank cake to a goodbye party because I couldn't figure out how to ask the cake lady to write on it for me. I almost walked out of a vets office once because I couldn't figure out what to say the reason for bringing my dog in was.

And let's not forget the fact that I am "too direct" or "too blunt" with people Luckily most of my jobs that someone has commented on that, the other employees think it's funny. Which is good because I'm still confused as to what is too blunt to say and what isn't sometimes.

So verbal communication is the most expedient method, generally. I'm just awkward at it.

I can sign, but my teachers years ago taught me S.E.E. (Signing Exact English) which is not exactly ASL and my deaf acquaintances often get bored when I try to communicate to them in sign as I-sign-each-word-as-I-would-say-it which causes a lot of meaningless extra eyestrain for those trained in the more contextual ASL. About the only SEE users today are deaf children of hearing parents who are concerned about their kids learning correct English structure. We have an ASD kid that is mostly nonverbal but has hearing within normal limits (last time checked) so I never pushed sign language on him as he seems satisfied using his tablet to type and show anything he would be more comfortable not speaking. His fine dexterity is not impaired like mine as he seems to lack the SPD issues I have, so he's quite the expert texter. FWIW, I got a new set of hearing aids for XMAS, but I've been waiting for NYE to try them out in public.
I see that most on this thread hate the telephone as much as I do. I forgot to mention in my earlier post how much "voice recognition" automated systems ANGER me when I reach such a thing. I've actually contacted a few companies that are using the technology and threatened to turn them in for ADA non-compliance with my special needs. So far most have either responded with a way for me to skirt around the V.R. and use touch tones instead, and a few have even changed their automated systems to now ask the caller to "please say or enter" information instead of the stupid computer small talk of "please tell us why you're calling".
Also FutureVet, I'm SO guilty of the same verbal "bluntness" you mentioned. I must be the world's worst brownoser, as I've always believed that "today's schmoozers are tomorrow's losers". The smalltalker extroverts are always saying to me "So Chris, tell us how you really feel", which I have to assume is some wierd type of sarcasm.

I don't mind speaking, though I fumble over almost all the words. I don't really like emails or texts or phone calls. Also if I'm having trouble speaking my typing is no better. Pictures or picking out words would be easiest but it's awfully limiting, so taking a while typing when I have to type and fumbling over words and mixing them up when I speak will have to do.

I'm cool with speaking, but I have more preferable ways to communicate.
Here's my order of communication preference, from top favorite, to least favorite.

1. Eye Contact
2. Facial Expressions
3. Aura/Presence
4. Body Language
5. Emotion
6. Touch
7. Posturing
8. Gestures
9. Appearance
10. Movement
11. Oral/Verbal
12. Dancing
13. Singing
14. Images
15. Writing
16. Typing



Generally, I can run through the first ten methods of communication listed above in just within a few short moments of meeting a person. Though if I capture their gaze from a distance I can usually communicate quite a bit of information in the short time it takes to close the gap between us.

As I said before, I'm cool with speaking, but it's pretty far down the list... Admittedly, if I could get by on the first 10, or even the first 5, then that would be awesome. Impractical, but awesome. Ironically, I'm quite the talker once I get going, especially when it comes to my interests, but then who isn't that true about.

Your responses are all very interesting. I totally get the phone thing. I won't pick up unless I recognise the caller ID, and eve then, sometimes I ignore them and wait for them to text me instead. I get anxious talking to strangers on the phone because, beyond their being strangers, which I hate, their contacting me is usually unexpected, which is unnerving and disruptive, and it can be hard to understand what they're saying, and to make myself understood clearly.

I really want to learn sign language, I think it would be really great to be able to just talk with my hands, and if I did it enough, my family would eventually pick it up. I tried taking a class at my university, but I had recently graduated and would have had to pay a re-enrollment fee, which I couldn't afford. I've been trying to learn periodically by watching youtube videos, with limited success.

I like email, because it allows me to read over someone's words as many times as I need, so I fully understand what they're saying, and it gives me as much time as I want to compose an eloquent and thought-out reply, which is virtually always lacking in face to face or phone conversations. Like Idealist, the only time I really talk a lot is when I start discussing my special interests, then I'm like a runaway train.

By text.