Therapy/Medication?

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I definitely don't have an anxiety problem. When I'm interacting with other people, I never feel scared or embarassed, but I always drive them off for some reason. It's like I just can't figure out how to make small talk, or how to become close friends with anyone. I just don't know how to do it, no matter how much I practice.

I hate small talk too. Simple answer act dumb and give short answers. small talk=short answer. It should last no more than ten minutes. It depends how I feel but sometime I can be arsed. One problem I had is I never initiated anything or contacted people. That is a hard thing to learn to do. But if you don't have any anxiety you just have to remember to do it.

NT relationships are more complex that they need to be t is not your fault. They need constant reassurance through things like small talk. Remember to use their name in conversation. I know it is totally redundant when you are talking to them but they like it.

I think half of the problem is hating small talk because it seems so worthless. I wish I knew how to make friends that I could confide in about anything. I don't have any right now. It would be wonderful if people called me to ask of we could make plans for the weekend, or to ask if I was okay if they knew I was going through something stressful.

I have the phone numbers of several people, but I feel like a pest calling them. A lot of them make excuses for why we can't hang out, and hardly any of them ever call me (I'm the one who has to call them) so that makes me feel like they aren't real friends. I feel like nobody cares about me except for my family members.

And I don't know how to get a boyfriend. I'm attracted to unique things that most girls aren't attracted to. I like guys who are sort of hippie types, with longer hair, who dress unique. My last boyfriend had piercings on his nose and bottom lip, which I loved. I wish I could be attracted to more average guys, but I'm really not. And there aren't many unique guys where I live. It sucks; I would kill for a boyfriend and a sex life again. I feel like I'd trade my soul, if I knew how, to get my last boyfriend back.

I'd actually like advice on him; we never officially broke up but he's going through an episode of mental illness and hasn't called me in a while. I told my mother what happened and she thinks that it might not actually be over between us. I might post details on what came between me and him in the relationships forum.

This is very true. I also hate small talk, especially in groups. I like serious, one-on-one conversations. Like the other day I was talking to my friend at the gym about a subject that interested me, when up came his other friend and started talking all about his new dog. Hello, we're talking here! But I felt obligated to pretend I gave a rat's arse about this guy's dog. Which I did for a moment. I finally excused myself, saying I needed to get on with my workout. (A graceful enough exit.) If I wanted to fit in, I would have endured the "dog talk" for a little longer, perhaps talking about dogs I've had, etc. But I just really didn't want to. I guess we have to balance our desire for new friends against our need to be true to ourselves and our true interests. In this case I chose the latter, but I would not have always done so.

Miranda, your original question had to do with treatments for AS. As you said, there really isn't a cure because it's a syndrome, not a disease. But there are treatments. There's medication in the form of atypical neuroleptics or atypical antipsychotics which work on dopamine and serotonin receptors in the brain. There are internet articles about these drugs that you can look up. I'm taking one called Risperdal (generic: risperidone). I was originally diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder and the drug was prescribed for that. When I looked Risperdal up on the net, that's when I found out about AS. Immediately, it became obvious that I was/am an Aspie, and my doctor agreed.

I'm also on an anti-depressant. I've suffered severe and worsening depression for many years now. I was first diagnosed about 10 years ago. Here's the deal: people with AS are highly prone to depression and anxiety. Most of us get diagnosed with these disorders as if they were our primary problem, when in truth they are merely symptoms of our true problem. The true diagnosis defies our doctors often for years, and goes untreated, creating more problems.

Many people with AS will eventually experience elevated stress levels derived from our social failures. Things like job loss, broken relationships, a lack of good friendships and family support all take their toll on us. This can cause us to have money problems, or find ourselves out in the cold when we need friends to help us move away from the divorcing spouse. This eventually leads to anxiety and depression. We get medicated and/or self-medicated which then places more physical stress on our bodies. Anti-depressants cause cortisol levels (the stress hormone) to jump through the roof.

In my own case, I went into undiagnosed adrenal failure (cortisone is produced by the adrenal gland) which in turn caused chronic fatigue. I also experienced a couple of seizures. I had already been long susceptible to migraines, a milder form of seizure. My doctors told me the fatigue was "in my head". I finally got put on Topamax (topiramate) for the migraines/seizures, and it also had an anti-anxiety effect.

This has turned into a very long post. But the point is that treating only the symptoms of our problem (e.g., depression) ends up making our AS worse. I went through manageable migraines and moderate depression which took several years to morph into seizures, anxiety/panic attacks, chronic fatigue, major depression and suicidal ideation, to say nothing of falling off the career ladder, experiencing a business failure and being unable to have a relationship. It would have been great if my doctors could have diagnosed and begun treating me for AS when I first started going to them all those years ago.

Anyway, look up Risperdal on the internet, then ask your doctor about it. It has some side-effects, but so do anti-depressants. I hope this helps.

I'm glad you brought that up. I just finished reading that, and he said that I think "traditional" psychotherapy doesn't really do any good for people with AS, while other types like mentioned above can. So yeah, someone who knows about AS or can adapt for it would probably be necessary.



I'm torn on the issue personally. On the one hand, I really wish my life went smoother and I knew what the heck I was supposed to do. On the other hand, I like who I am-I think I'm a good person with different strengths, and I don't think I'd want to get rid of AS if it meant getting rid of me.



That sounds fishy to me. Like it might be a scam...but who knows. Tony Attwood didn't mention anything about it in his book that just came out. I guess supposedly the Mercury thing was discredited, and this sounds like it might be a scam playing on that. Although I really thought there was supposed to be a correlation between autism and mercury levels...but who knows



That last part is just how I feel. The thing is, I *DO* have anxiety about interacting with people (especially ones I don't know) because of the latter part. Not knowing what to do causes me a lot of anxiety (I can function in a setting where I know what's expected of me-like helping someone at work, or something like that).



I really want this too! That's one of the reasons I'd like to maybe meet local Aspies, since I think we might understand and accept each other.



Yup. That's just how I feel too.



Ditto, except for a girlfriend in my case. I've dated a bit, had one serious relationship, but it's hard for me to meet anyone since I don't do social things, and then I feel like the things I'm interested in aren't going to be interesting to a girl (and I don't really like going out all the time like most people seem to).

I loved this science fiction story I read years ago where a computer analyzes everyone at a certain age, and matches them up to their best possible match. That still seems ideal to me



Yeah, post it. Might as well

I can speak for myself at least,

I went to the general works section at the library and found "psychology for dummies". I have not gotten far into reading it, though. I'm not sure who would find it to be informative about stuff for self-help or anything either.

Think of a time in your life when there is a transition between you being confused or have anxiety in a situation and then you felt like you knew the situation better to deal with it better.

I do not take anything pharmecuetical for the circumstances that I have. Mine are very different than most. I do not have any mental disorders.

Anyways, there are other therapies to depression than psychiatric medicine that inspire you to feel more confident in yourself just taking it day by day. These "therapies" are very simple. All that they require of you is to distract your attention away from trying to succeed at things that you feel makes you inadequate and a failure. One of them is excercise and the other is just reading and self-help.

Personally, I read a book also called "a users guide to the brain". This was published I think in 2002. Its the latest trend in information to unlocking the secrets of the functions of the brain. His book starts out with a summary of the beginning of a story of the life of Temple Grandin and Temple Grandin was one of the main inspirations for the author John J. Ratey to learn from to write his book.

There are stories of personal triumphs in neurological disorders and of documentations of victims of brain damage that have influenced the researchers in the neuroscience medical community and that his book has used to illustrate the importance of learning from and taking care of our brains.

Personally, I also see a good case-worker at a mental health organization where people follow guidelines from their boss. I do not see a psychiatrist or am pressured to take pharmeceuticals when I go there. I was in the past but that was the old nutter case-worker that I had to graduate from for a case-worker who is more open minded to stuff like aspergers. This is helpful becasue I know that she cares and she can help me get new referals for other sources if she can find them.

One of the things that she is supportive of right now is to help me move into an apartment with my discount voucher. I'm not sure how I will handle it but it is something for me to do. Its a goal for me that I have set.

And I hope that you can take care of your brain.